Persona 4: June 6th – June 18th (The Campout)

Kanji finally comes back to school.

He makes the effort to be polite, which Chie immediately mocks because she’s a dick. He claims not to remember what happened, which is definitely a lie because none of the others forgot their Shadows. Chie immediately grills him on who his boyfriend was. He gives a completely reasonable explanation that he’s just a guy he wanted to hang out with, which Chie immediately reads as gay because it’s impossible for platonic friendships between guys to exist. (Wonder what Yosuke thinks about this and all all the bro time we’ve been having.)

KANJI: I, uh… I don’t really get it myself.

Ugh, this is so pathetic. It’s like even he’s trying to nohomo himself. After reaffirming his misogyny, he does at least manage to cough this out:

KANJI: Girls are so loud and obnoxious, so, y’know… I really don’t like dealing with ’em.

(he says in front of the two girls who saved his life)

KANJI: S-So, uh, I started thinking… What if I’m the type who never gets interested in girls?

Honestly, he sounds more bi than gay to me. He’s never said he doesn’t find women attractive, just that they’re scary.

YOSUKE: Well, I can understand the part about feeling more relaxed around dudes.

OH DO YOU, NOW. One of the other spoilers I’ve heard is that Yosuke has a cut romance with the protagonist (and yes, I have installed the mod that restores it), which makes this a very interesting statement.

Kanji elaborates on what his Shadow said: Since he grew up in a textile family, he’s always had an interesting in sewing, “But the second I say stuff like that, people look at me funny… Girls make fun of me, the people in the neighborhood treat me like I’m some zoo animal.” Again, why are only girls specifically making fun of him? Is the subtext here that he tolerates it from boys because he’s gay? But no, that doesn’t make sense, because he specifically says the reason he prefers boys is because they’re not as mean.

Yosuke gets down to business and grills him on how he was TV-napped. He says he remembers feeling like someone came to his house, but doesn’t remember if anyone actually came. For some reason they’re weirdly cagey about telling him the TV connection, but after he joins the team (granting me another rank up) they finally explain the situation… at Junes, once again in full view of the gossiping public.

KANJI: Wait, so someone’s killing people with a TV…? What, is he beating them to death?

Bahaha. Kanji asking the important questions.

And we actually listen to the background NPCs this time! They’re talking about seeing Kanji on the Midnight Channel. So people are watching it, so why isn’t everyone in town talking about it? Especially since he took time off school immediately after! That’s plenty of time for rumors to percolate.

Yukiko points out Kanji disproves their theory that all the victims are female. She falls back on the Yamano connection, but I say we still can’t be sure of anything. Kanji reveals that when he came back to school, he found someone snooping around about his disappearance, and stole a note from him that contains two clues and a smoking gun:

  1. A top album chart with Hiiragi’s album at the top. Apparently, her sales have jumped since the incident. Yosuke immediately dismisses her since she has an alibi. Does no one understand the concept of accomplices?
  2. A “female announcer ranking” that reveals Yamano wasn’t popular until just before her murder.
  3. A “list of TV programs” that lists the dates of each victims’ appearances on TV.

The third one gets everyone to realize the victims all appeared on TV shortly before they were kidnapped. Alright, so my theory was right! They go on to point out that the culprit moved onto Kanji instead of trying to kidnap Yukiko, implying they are only targeting people right after TV appearances… and wait a minute, there were those tabloid journalists in Yukiko’s social link trying to get her back on TV! It was a social link, so probably not plot-relevant, but it raises the question of what would happen if Yukiko went on TV again. Yosuke is frustrated because they still don’t have a motive, even though this is actually a huge breakthrough — we now know how to predict the next victim!

They head into the TV world to introduce Kanji to Teddie. Kanji wants to pet Teddie, but Teddie refuses. Then Kanji realizes that if Yukiko went through the same thing as him, then she also must’ve “come out” to everyone (see, he does remember!), which makes her slap him. Jeez, Yukiko. She offers to be more “gentle” next time, which makes Kanji blush — so yes, he’s bi. Teddie gives him glasses, but they’re the gag glasses — apparently, Yukiko insisted, so this is now the team’s hazing ritual. I feel like people should be more sensitive about bullying new members, given they just went through extreme emotional trauma. Kanji chucks the gag glasses into the void and finally gets his real glasses, which are cool shades.

On the 7th, the kids discuss the school campout that’s coming up.

YOSUKE: Does that mean we sleep together at night, too!?
CHIE: You wish! Guys and girls sleep in different tents!

I’m sure Kanji’s fine with that! You should be too, Chie! (In all seriousness, they really should bring up how gender segregation loses all justification when gay people exist.)

After school, Morooka complains that we’re not in the Student Health Association. Hey, didn’t he tell me I couldn’t take multiple clubs? So really this is his fault. When I help out, the students mention that Saki’s brother also works at the health association.

He hates Yosuke. Fair. He also hates me. Less fair! Despite coming in, he immediately says he has to leave to help out at home.

In class on the 8th Yukiko asks me what “heikin-dai” is. I obviously have no idea, but would this be a difficult question for Japanese players? I cheat by looking it up on the internet, and the teacher finally has a reasonable reaction: “But you should ask me if you have questions, Yukiko-chan, not him!” Hallelujah, one of the teachers here actually cares about educating students. Balance beam is “heikin-dai” in Japanese!” he goes on to say to the Japanese students. I wonder if this was flipped in the Japanese version?

After school, Yosuke proceeds to be a gross creep by telling me about his fantasies of girls squishing their boobs against him when he rides a motorcycle. He then proposes that we get our licenses together, I guess because he’s decided the purpose of motorcycles is to squish peoples’ chests against your back, so he needs me to get my own because if I ride his it would be gay. Kanji shows up and Yosuke proceeds to embarrass him by loudly talking about how every guy totally wants a hot girlfriend.

> Tell me more.
> You’re like a kindergartener.
> So you’re over her?

Ohoho! I did not expect the game to let me say that! Yeah, let’s go for the jugular.

YOSUKE: Why’d you bring that up…? [annoyed emoji] Well, I mean… I gotta get over her sometime.

You got over her instantaneously.

YOSUKE: Wait, no, this isn’t supposed to be a serious conversation! Back to the subject! Don’t worry about me–what you oughta be worried about is ~smooshes~! [thanks VA for enunciating the creep factor]

I know the dialogue has to always link back up, but Jesus Christ, Yosuke.

YOSUKE: As long as we have a motorcycle, the girls will come running! That’s all the advantage we’ll need!

Who is this “we” you’re talking about?

Yosuke just keeps talking in front of the gynophobe about his strategies to help “us” pick up chicks. He loudly declares that the only reason he doesn’t have a girlfriend is because there aren’t enough people in the sticks so he needs to go to the city to get one willing to tolerate him. Kanji, who is clearly desperate for our approval, keeps trying to join the conversation and Yosuke keeps being a dick to him, all but telling him to screw off every time even though he has way more knowledge about motorcycles than this doofus.

YOSUKE: I’m serious about this…

Just like you were “serious” about rescuing Saki, huh? Yosuke, there is a murderer on the loose and this is what you’re caring about? It’s like he’s finally gotten bored of that and is moving onto a new adrenaline rush. …My sociopath theory is looking stronger by the day.

On my way out I discover I can ask Ai out on a date. Ehhhh… I guess I need more social links? Sure, girl, I’ll pretend to care about you long enough for you to cough up a card. …And she says I can’t go out with her until tomorrow anyway. Okay.

Kanji wants to go into the TV world today and I have some quest items to fetch, so I indulge him. As with Yukiko, a Regular Enemy But Bigger boss has appeared in his dungeon, so I have to trek alllll the way back up to fight it, then I have to spend even more time faffing around to get the quest drops. I really can’t see any purpose to this other than to waste the player’s time. I could see the argument (even if it’s a bad one) that they don’t want to let us get the quest drops before we take the quest because that would make it easier to game the calendar system, but there is no reason at all not to let us travel freely between floors of dungeons we’ve already explored. The boss, at least, is way easier than the Contrarian King due to having an actual weakness, so I beat him on my first try. (I do have to burn a lot of Revival Beads because he kept 2-shotting Yukiko with Bufula though.)

Along the way, I discover follow-up attacks do have unique effects: Yukiko’s instantly dizzies an enemy, which isn’t as useful as instant death but might be effective in boss battles, we’ll see. I only got it to trigger once during this whole dungeon crawl, though. (Also, the way she cures fear/panic/rage is to slap people, lol.)

Back at home, Dojima is having Adachi over for dinner.

ADACHI: You want some eel too? Fair warning: it’s from the supermarket.

What is Yosuke not telling us about Junes’ food sources?

DOJIMA: Sorry, but this guy eats instant noodles every day.

Dojima, you regularly feed your daughter instant noodles. Are you lying to save face in front of your subordinate?

ADACHI: But eel was a great choice! Nanako-chan loved it, at least. I’d say she’s eel-y proud of her daddy! Eh? Ehhhh…? Haha…

…Adachi makes lame animal puns, just like Teddie. (Farla: “Also, he’s the only nice person we’ve met, so obviously he’s evil.”)

I ask Dojima about getting a motorcycle license. Our silent protagonist elides over the details of the conversation, but I wonder how that must have gone. “So, my friend wants to creep on girls…” Dojima is hesitant, but Adachi backs me up.

ADACHI: I understand how you feel, since I’m from the city myself.

Huh, did we know this already? I spend so long between play sessions I can’t remember. Regardless, another red flag. Adachi is a newcomer and an outsider, and a city boy would probably care a lot more about a TV announcer.

Adachi rhetorically asks me if going everywhere on foot is a hassle. Technically, no, because travel takes no in-game time. Adachi insists that no it totally is. He goes on to calmly mention that Dojima was apparently a reckless motorcyclist in his youth. Like, he doesn’t say it in a joking way, he just states it very calmly and seriously. At this point I can’t help but assume he’s doing this deliberately, but to what end? This reminder seems like it would make Dojima less inclined to give us a license, not more. Dojima gets upset at Adachi spilling his personal information, but is interrupted by a phone call. He asks Adachi for the case file, and Adachi lets slip that there’s a “suspicious guy” they’ve seen.

DOJIMA: About this license… did you decide on this yourself? No one talked you into it?

So no, we did not tell him the circumstances that led to this. We double down on the lie by nodding. He points out motorcycles are dangerous.

> “I’ll be careful with it.”
> “I want you to trust me.”

Alright, let’s engage in psychological warfare. You started this, buddy. Dojima suddenly relents and acts friendly, saying that he’d love to discuss this further but there’s no point because we don’t have a license and it’s just so hard to get one.

He walks out and I get a call from Yosuke. He… just babbles more about motorcycle licenses instead of anything important.

You wonder about the “suspicious guy” Adachi mentioned, but there’s no way to find out more about it for now.

I could absolutely go out and stalk them. But no, John just decides to study for his motorcycle exam because that’s more important. We skip straight to the next day, where Yosuke talks more about the exam.

YOSUKE: I see you haven’t forgotten about our “up close and personal” plan.

Despite my best efforts, yes, thank you for reminding me. My afternoon is taken up by the exam, which I just pass automatically. Or is it based on my knowledge stat? We see Dojima and run over to show off our new license. He’s shocked, because I guess he thought I was an idiot. Conveniently, he’s just filled up his old scooter, so he can hand it off to me.

Adachi conveniently lets slip that…

ADACHI: Hasn’t [the suspect] been using professional-quality cameras to take pictures of peoples’ houses from the Amagi Inn to around here? Looks like he knows the back streets too…

“I’m always trying so hard, but darn, I just can’t ever seem to catch him! He’s just so clever and smart and does such great camerawork, and so handsome, too!” How do they even know they’re professional-quality? Are they seeing the photos? How? Is this an analog camera and the culprit is dropping them behind him like breadcrumbs?

Dojima orders him to shut up, and reveals to me that he got his license behind his parents’ backs.

DOJIMA: When my dad caught me riding a scooter later on, he gave me a good thrashing… Hahaha.

Haha, child abuse!

I go back to school to cash in my quest rewards and learn Kanji is supposedly bullying people in the practice building. I head over to find him pathetically watching the sewing club, and for some reason John acts like he actually believes a random student over a guy whose soul he’s seen. He resolves to beat up the real bullies so as to “not cause trouble” for me, and I get his social link: the Emperor. Seems like an odd choice for a guy so conflicted about his masculinity, but I guess we’ll see how it develops.

On the 10th Chie ambushes me before class to ask if I’ve been thinking about the murder case. No, sorry Chie, I’ve been focused on getting a motorcycle license because that’s more important.

I finally finish reading The Gentle Way and get my expression high enough to talk to Nanako about death. I ask her why she’s asking about this now, and… she saw a funeral on TV because of course she did, who else would be speaking to her? Then she asks me what happens when people die. Ooh boy. I tell her a comforting lie and say they go to Heaven. “And you could too if you just walk into traffic, little girl who spends most of her time alone!” is left implied. She appreciates this. Then she’s upset that Daddy leaves her alone so much to deal with bad people, and claims that he used to be around more and pick her up from school last year because there was less crime.

NANAKO: Are bad people more important to Dad than I am?

> “That’s not true.”
> “He’s protecting everyone.”
> “He’s protecting you.”

Eugh, none of these are good options. I pick “That’s not true,” because I don’t want to spout copaganda, which just makes Nanako call me a liar.

On the 12th Yukiko asks to hang out on another grocery trip. She’s apparently having trouble making even the most basic food. I tell her to ask someone for help, but she just insists “there’s no point unless I do it alone…” because she’s an idiot. I reload and offer to teach her myself so she doesn’t die of food poisoning… and she still says no. Well, I tried. Apparently she’s such a horrible cook the inn chefs can’t even bear to watch and take over for her when she tries to cook under them. She managed to get around this by lying that she’s practicing how to cook for a boy she likes, then of course she starts blushing about how ~maybe it’s not a lie~.

Her blushing face looks so weird. It honestly looks like she’s having a fever or something.

You felt a faint hint of love from Yukiko…

Please, Yukiko, no, don’t make me complicit in your compulsory heterosexuality. Please let me throw Chie at you instead.

Creeping on me gains Yukiko Amrita, which is pretty good, but her skill inventory is too full of skills that are even better, so I pass. I’ll just have to rely on cure items.

On the 13th the students switch to their summer uniforms, so I definitely won’t be able to conceal my weapons anymore. I finally try out my new scooter, which takes all afternoon and raises my courage a bit.

On the 14th, nothing happens. On the 15th, Yosuke informs me he’s gotten his motorcycle license and insists we head to the city to pick up chicks. In class I have to explain the difference between “morals” and “morale” and then… I don’t even get a choice, Yosuke drags me to Okina City. Then Kanji shows up, having apparently followed us here on his regular bike:

Yosuke, of course, continues to be a raging dick. What does he have against this kid, seriously? (And aw, Kanji made sure to wear a helmet! Safety first! No pads, though.) Kanji says he wants to go off on his own to buy craft supplies, and though I’d much rather hang out with him I am railroaded into staying with King Sleazeball.

…We wait in the same location for three hours, because Yosuke apparently expects girls to just walk up to him. Kanji comes back, apparently having had a much more productive afternoon. Kanji points out the obvious fact that we are using scooters, not motorcycles, because as the biker kid he is capable of noticing these things so maybe you shouldn’t have been so dismissive of him, Yosuke. Kanji offers to “avenge” us by hitting on girls for us, even though he’s scared of them! Wow, he is genuinely so nice. Yosuke does not deserve him. Yosuke proceeds to neg him by insisting there is no way the hot muscular bad boy could possibly be a bigger chick magnet than him.

…Then things devolve into a chick acquisition contest. So I guess we’re repeating that bit from P3. What annoys me is that this could actually be relevant to the persona thing and how you present yourself, but instead it’s just here because the writers are manchildren.

YOSUKE: Why did we even start this…?

I wonder too, Yosuke. I wonder too.

As with the segment from P3, it is actually really funny. There are a ton of characters, all of whom derail the conversation hilariously, and all of your dialogue options are hilariously bad, including the option to open every conversation by outright saying “I’m hitting on you.” You can even hit on a police officer, who seems to take it weirdly seriously before insisting he can’t because he already has a wife and kids. Yosuke attempts to bribe a girl with Junes coupons and a girl is terrified by Kanji’s attempts to fix her frayed shirt. As in P3, there is also a ludicrously obvious pedophile who is the only one you can get a number from.

Afterwards, everyone meets up. Kanji apparently got a number from a prostitute without realizing it. I attempt to call the pedophile’s number only to get her husband (?) who threatens to kill me. Yosuke also somehow got a number (from a “sexy, older lady” so presumably another pedophile) despite not even telling the girl his name, because he’s shocked when she knows it. The girl claims they go to the same school and introduces herself as “Hanako”, which makes Yosuke freak out. Oh, is she Hanako the ghost from the previous Personas?

KANJI: It sounded like a fiend from the pits of the earth… I could feel a chill go down my spine.

…No? She sounded totally normal. They should have added a reverb effect or something if she was supposed to sound spooky.

…And no, she’s actually an ordinary person, she’s just super ugly. Well, there goes my hopes this was plot-relevant instead of a fatphobic joke. Yosuke acts like she’s well-known at Yasogami, so why haven’t we seen her before now? She tries to jump on his motorcycle and breaks it, which makes Yosuke despair.

YOSUKE: Am I cursed…? Did I insult a gypsy or something?

Well, you have now. I wonder if this was different in Japanese? Hopefully something less offensive?

Kanji, because he is endlessly nice, offers to give Yosuke a ride home on his bike, forcing Yosuke to be on the receiving end of his sexy bike ride plan. Kanji gets horny as soon as he realizes this, which provokes a nohomo freakout from Yosuke so he has to take the train home instead. That’s fine, he doesn’t deserve Kanji anyway.

The 16th is the day before the campout, so Yukiko wants to go shopping for ingredients. They’re forcing the kids to make their own food? Chie worries that Yosuke will be really picky, so doesn’t know what to get for him. Well why isn’t he here then? And why do you even care what that dickhead wants? Chie also reveals she is not any better at cooking than Yukiko and mostly just guesses her way through the ingredient list. For some reason I cannot help at any point.

CHIE: How about mint chocolate!? I love that stuff!

You will not see the light of Heaven.

At the campout, Yosuke whines about having to pick up trash and apparently made the girls do all the cooking.

YOSUKE: Dude, the girls cooked just for us! Not that I expect much outta Chie, but Yukiko’s got the full tradition of the Amagi Inn behind her food!

Oh, you’re going to regret this. And he does! I try to eat it myself, but I apparently lack the courage. I’m given the option to pretend to eat it, but I’m just told I can’t, so I eat it and also get food poisoning.

We return to our tents hungry and suffering. Kanji is also here because he got expelled from the first-year tent. There’s some banter, and then he actually gives us something interesting: Morooka was badmouthing the first two murder victims.

KANJI: It was like, “It’s no surprise that people who are unfaithful or run away from home meet a bad end…”

That actually sounds like he was talking about Yukiko there.

They try to go to sleep and Yosuke decides to be a homophobic dickwad.

YOSUKE: A-Are you really… you know…?

You saw his soul, Yosuke. You know.

YOSUKE: What I mean is, uh… Are we gonna be safe alone with you?

Sigh. I had heard there was something really objectionable about this scene, so I was at least prepared for this. It’s particularly offensive when this comes right on the heels of Yosuke creeping on a bunch of girls, which was just wacky hijinks. (Also, gotta love that Yosuke’s apparently fine with him raping the first-years as long as it gets Kanji away from him personally.) Kanji obviously doesn’t take this well, and I’m forced to just awkwardly stand there and listen to Yosuke continue escalating instead of defending Kanji at any point.

Kanji reveals he apparently [has] no problem being around girls now,” which… sure is a sentence. The writers continue to not understand that bisexuality exists. Yosuke demands he “prove it” by, what, raping a girl?

YOSUKE: ‘Cause if you can’t, we’re gonna be stuck here all night half scared to death.

Speak for yourself, there is no “we” here. Why can I not say this, game? Kanji, because he is desperate for approval and deserves better friends than this dumpster fire, immediately declares “I’m gonna go hit the girls’ tent right now!” to which Yosuke has the gall to declare “Wait, well that’s a little extreme!” How else did you want him to “prove it”, dickwad? He says Kanji totally shouldn’t do it because Morooka said he’d expel Kanji at the slightest excuse… Oh, of course, he’s trying to get Kanji expelled. Only at this point do I get dialogue options… One of which is to egg Kanji on. Jesus, game. No, I tell him not to do it… but he won’t listen. What was the point of that choice?

Yosuke’s reaction as soon as Kanji runs out to get expelled:

YOSUKE: What a putz. I declare myself not responsible for anything that happens.

So yes, he absolutely set this up and was only warning Kanji against it to establish plausible deniability. You are human garbage, Yosuke.

Then we cut to the girls’ tent because this trainwreck just keeps going. Chie and Yukiko can’t sleep because Hanako snores too loudly, because ha ha isn’t it so inconvenient how fat people exist. Yukiko suggests murdering Hanako, but Chie talks her down to merely running out into the night. We cut back to the boys’ tent, where Chie and Yukiko explain that Kanji apparently passed out as soon as he entered the girls’ tent, whereupon they decided to just leave their friend in a dire medical emergency. Because this needed more anime “comedy”, Morooka shows up to yell at us, but he’s drunk enough to not bother checking inside the tent and wanders off.

CHIE: We were nearly expelled…
YOSUKE: Hey, this is you guys’ fault!

Oh, that’s rich.

CHIE: You better not try any funny stuff while we’re asleep, is that clear?

Shoe’s on the other foot now, dickwad. Yosuke whines more and insists that, somehow, the girls owe him for this.

The next day… Everyone just regroups in the morning as if nothing happened. WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ALL THAT. Kanji apparently can’t remember anything that happened, and the girls imply they dragged his body back to the boys’ tent before he woke up. Then Yosuke wants to go swimming, but the girls don’t.

YOSUKE: You know, you two still owe us.


Gotta love how Yosuke gay panics over the mere thought of sharing a tent with the shyest, most pathetic gay guy ever, then turns around and immediately pulls this, because sexual harassment is only real when it’s happening to him. The girls try to get out of it by insisting they forgot their swimsuits, whereupon Yosuke reveals he bought two women’s bathing suits just before the trip, apparently for this exact purpose. Because sexual harassment isn’t enough, no, it has to be premediated sexual harassment, we definitely needed this.

CHIE: Dude, that’s just wrong…

Thank you, Chie. Can I agree with her? Please? No, I just stand there while Yosuke explains how they have to repay his “help” for a problem he caused with sexual favors.

Well, at least the boys stripped too. Can we at least have Kanji creep on them for fairness’ sake? Please? …No, he blushes at the girls.

[The girls] seem embarrassed…


YOSUKE: Those girls might be childish on the inside, but I bet they’re gonna turn into some fine-looking women before too long!

If I had to read it so do you. Yosuke tries to make me complicit in this, and my only options are to agree or disagree, and of course that makes the girls angrier than Yosuke pulling this stunt in the first place. Please let this end with Chie roundhouse-kicking Yosuke off the cliff. Please please please.

OH MY GOD SHE ACTUALLY DOES! Your suffering is not nearly enough, Yosuke. Kanji turns around and…

Ew, that is such a grossly visceral nosebleed. Still, at least we have equal-opportunity creeping. That’s something? Yukiko is grossed out and pushes him in too. Oh, come on, Yukiko, don’t take out your internalized homophobia on him. To compound the suffering, we then learn Morooka has been vomitting into the river upstream.

You feel as though a million showers will never make you clean…

I think we all feel the same at this point.


  1. Valkiria de la flame says:

    Ah, the summer event. Always a classic. It makes you wonder if playing the series is worth it at all. Also, it has been ages since I played, but I thought you could get all quest items before you had the quest, since they are the drops you sell at the metalwork shop, but I might have misremembered.

    And the “Adachi is nice so he must be evil” and “Yosuke is a sociopath” is really funny, keep it up.

    1. St. Elmo's Fire says:

      Also, it has been ages since I played, but I thought you could get all quest items before you had the quest, since they are the drops you sell at the metalwork shop, but I might have misremembered.

      No, that would be too reasonable. The quest drops are separate items that only appear after you accept the quest.

  2. Anon says:

    The random NPCs you call pedophiles would actually be ephebophiles. Just a nitpick.

    1. St. Elmo's Fire says:

      I know, but ephebophile is less well-known as a term and, honestly, the difference is academic. They’re both bad for the same reasons.

  3. Seed of Bismuth says:

    leaving all the -phobias aside for a moment what is wrong with mint chocolate?
    (some rando on internet says while enjoying Christmas mint chocolate fudge)

    1. St. Elmo's Fire says:

      I actually don’t mind it, but Farla hates it and promises me it is a commonly-held sentiment. I am dubious of this, but it made for a funny joke.


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