Now for Victory Road.

Throh just appeared! It’s L50, but gets into the ultraball easily.

When it encounters a foe bigger than itself, it wants to throw it. It changes belts as it gets stronger.

Really embracing the insanity of clothed pokemon, I see.

There’s a section that requires flash, or doesn’t quite require it because you can still muddle your way through. It’s weird for it to only appear now – it’s a lot less annoying in the early game because you’re more likely to have a spare slot for a HM move than by now.

Some other guy says: All I want are powerful Pokemon! Everyone here keeps talking about pokemon strength and saying different things. Only a Pokemon that understands that can become one of my partners! he goes on, as if the pokemon have any sort of choice. To put it another way, he catches pokemon but only keeps the strong ones for his team. Since, after all, there is no mechanism for pokemon to join you or express any opinions, there isn’t any other way for this to happen.

Anyway, it looks like you have a choice of ascent paths, and can bypass a lot of trainers.

Another pair of veterans lurks at the top, between ruined columns.

Hey, beyond there the cave now has construction warning signs closing it off and is partly collapsed, with fallen sand or dirt half obscuring pathways down.

Wait up!

don’t be Failry don’t be Failry

FUCK

It’s Failry.

Gary: I’ll battle with you before you take on the Pokemon League. The more Pokemon battles you have, the stronger you get, right?

And yet here you are blathering on instead of fighting me.

He does a pose of pulling out his pokeballs, but then the battle begins. At least he doesn’t heal me beforehand.

I saw that move coming miles away, he pops in to say as I murder his simipour with my serperior’s mega drain. Then why didn’t you switch it out? Also, why didn’t give your water pokemon an ice move, moron?

L59 unfezant
L59 simipour
L59 bouffalant
L61 emboar

Final battle before the elite four and he doesn’t even have a full team – in challenge mode no less.

I’m also irritated by how the pokemon are almost all the same level – actually, that’s been a problem with all the trainers here. They all have one or two pokemon that are all just below L60, instead of real variety.

Gary: Farla! Thanks to you, I accomplished what I set out to do during my journey.

I have to admit, I will have a certain black joy if for once it’s the male character that gives up on adventuring as soon as they’ve finished their original goal. Give me that, Failry. It’s the least you can do.

I wish I could’ve shown you my little sister’s huge smile! This is my thanks!

…

Farla obtained a TM24 Thunderbolt!

Seriously, game? The same sort of thing I can pick up off the ground while I walk? I don’t think any of my pokemon can even learn that!

I think you’re really amazing!

Let’s not make this weird, Failry.

So become the Champion! Get the proof that you’re a Trainer your Pokemon can be proud of! See you!

And, gloriously, he leaves.

The area beyond is the same top of the mountain in the first game, but now it’s got areas blocked off with caution barriers and is generally a mess. You can’t slide down any longer. How come? It wasn’t wrecked before.

Well then. My current team:

L61 serperior
L62 zoroark
L60 volcarona
L51 jellicent
L63 escavalier
L59 audino – I raised it up on the way.

So, let’s go buy some icecream healers, a million revival herbs, oh, and use the level raising things Join Avenue has. Now my escavalier is L71.

The guy out front:

Once you start your challenge, you cannot leave until you win against all or lose! Do you want to go in?

Hell yes.

Then, proceed!

As before, seems you can go in any order.

The first one I enter is just a black pulsing void. Going further, it turns into a dark library with stairs leading up and witchlight burning on either side for illumination. Libraries really aren’t that scary, Japan.

Up top is whatshername, the novelist. I dislike her most of all the fifth gen elite four. It gets back to my issue about not wanting bakers with high level pokemon. If you’re a final boss, you should care most about being a strong trainer.

So anyway, her platform is filled with stacked paper and books that are moving in “eerie” ways with more witchlight. The game couldn’t make ghosts seem more dull if it tried. Approaching her makes that all disappear and then collapse into a mess. Guiltily, her swaying lamp hops into position and then holds still.

The fallen books serve to block your way back.

I’ll lead with my zoroark.

“There is one man
who wanders the world
with a black dragon Pokemon
to pursue ideals…”

That’s part of a novel I’m writing. I want to write down the event that happened on that day…

Sorry, it has nothing to do with you…

Well, that’s this game in a nutshell, yeah.

This whole direct sequel thing has been a disaster.

You’re a challenger, right? I’m the Elite Four’s Ghost-type user, Shauntal, and I shall be your opponent.

I really hate her character design. She just does not look like someone I should be intimidated by. She barely even fits the general design style of the rest of the characters.

L60 confagrius. L60? Seriously? In challenge mode? It gets oneshotted by my zozoark.
L60 golurk. Also oneshotted.
L62 chandelure. Guess what happens to that.
L60 driftblim. It gets in a hit because my attack missed. Then oneshotted.
L60 banette.

And we’re done here.

Do you ever feel at a loss for words when something greatly moves you? To tell the truth… I’m a writer, but right now I’m having trouble putting my feelings into words. You were just that impressive!

My Pokémon and the challenger’s Pokémon. Everyone battled even though they were hurt… Thank you.

Fortitude is needed if you’re going to battle, don’t you think? Because both you and your opponent get hurt. But if you don’t understand the pain, you’ll focus on the result and forget about the bonds with your Pokemon.

You imply I ever think about their suffering to begin with. They’re just pixels.

That’s why I want to write passages full of heart and soul in my novels.

Ah, fanfic. Yeah, I get that.

And off I go.

The next one looks even more creepy. The staircase has giant claws over it that pull back to let you pass, then close up again once you do so. Much more impressive than books being so messy you can’t get past them. Dark, so I’ll lead with my volcarona.

What will be determined here is which of us can absorb the opponent’s light and shine… But who will decide that? It shall be I, Grimsley of the Elite Four, and I will fulfill my duty to be your opponent.

L60 liepard. Yep, going to be all L60s then.

You know, it wouldn’t be hard to mix letting you pick the order and having each one be higher level. Just set it so that the next person you fight has, say, a team two levels higher than the baseline, and so on.

It’s actually a pretty good pokemon, though, leading with fakeout and then having the speed to hit me first. Then it’s oneshotted.

L60 scrafty knocks out my volcarona. It really isn’t living up to its super legendary status, although it’s pretty strong. My escavalier knocks it out easily.

L60 krookodile, with intimidate. I’m trying out my zoroark and its u-turn – that takes out half its hp, but no more. So then it’s my serperior’s turn. Frenzy plant? And it’s knocked out. I avoid the cooldown by switching pokemon.

L60 absol. My zoroark again – with all my revives it’s easier to just let it faint and heal it afterward. U-turn almost knocks it out but doesn’t quite. How about my audino? Aw, it used psycho-cut, I should have spent a turn hitting it with another move then used u-turn. Oh well. Then it gets hit with full restore, but double-edge leaves it with a third of its hp. So, wish and switch then.

L62 bisharp. Let’s try out dig with my zoroark, it’s in the form of my jellicent so there’s a good chance the bisharp will waste time trying to hit it with a dark move. And yup, night slash. It then tries to use x-scissor, but it’s too late.The second dig attack takes it out.

And that’s it.

Where there’s a winner, there’s also a loser. It’s pathetic to make a big deal out of losing if you weren’t prepared. If you’re a true Pokémon battler, you’ll reflect upon your loss and think about how to win next time!

Whether or not you get to fight at full strength, whether or not luck smiles on you–none of that matters. Only results matter. And a loss is a loss. See, victory shines like a bright light. And right now, you and your Pokémon are shining brilliantly.

Now, I’m nothing more than the one who lost his light… But this loss will make me shine even brighter next time… If I think that way, it’s not too bad. Sigh… You should take that strength and test it against the rest of the Elite Four.

The next room is beautiful, black with glittering white dust falling. At the center is a white flower – a rose, I think – that opens and disappears to reveal my opponent. Then the stairs vanish and turn into a nearly invisible cube that proceeds to orbit the platform, because who knows? It’s visually impressive, anyway.

I’ll lead with my zoroark again.

It’s me who appeared when the flower opened up.

Uh. Yes, I just saw you.

You, standing over there… You look like a Pokémon Trainer with strength and kindness. What I look for in my opponent is superb strength… I’m counting on you!

It’s like the game is bored of pretending to care.

L60 musharna
L60 reuniclus
L62 metagross. Maybe I should have revived my volcarona? Well, I bet my escavalier can handle it. And ha, it’s holding a life orb, even if I had nothing that could hurt it I could just wait it out.
L60 gothitelle to yet again be oneshotted
L60 sigilyph, and why is this even last, game, they’re a setup pokemon, even I know they’re a setup pokemon, you should have tried to use reflect at the start.

And that’s all.

You and your Pokémon are both excellent and elegant. To have been able to battle against such a splendid team… My Pokémon and I learned a lot! I offer you my thanks.

You haven’t faced all of the members of the Elite Four yet, have you? Don’t concern yourself about me. Go on ahead.

Winning is important, but what’s more important is whether I’ve done better this time. Because if I can’t surpass myself, I can’t get close to my ideals. I want to improve and win more elegantly, so I invite you to be my opponent again in the future, if you wish.

Huh, I just noticed it looks like the statue in the center has a plaque.

Words are engraved on the statue:
“Four great warriors form this Pokemon League.

Uh, no, four “quirky” idiots do. Novellady and the one more concerned about being elegant than winning certainly aren’t warriors, and I’m pretty sure lounge scarf guy is the same.

This really bugs me. The time for quirky characters is during the eight gyms. By the elite four, I expect a bit of focus and competence. They should be intimidating, not weird.

To the southwest is one who does not fear the Ghost type. To the southeast is one who channels the power of the Fighting type. To the northwest is one who has mastered the Dark type. To the northeast is one who knows the mind of the Psychic type.

Well, that’s disappointing, I didn’t realize they told you where to go, I thought it was a sort of luck thing. It isn’t even a puzzle or hints, like it sounds like it could be when it’s saying “one who does not fear ghost types”, but no, it’s just a flowery way of saying trains them, rather than that it’s talking about a type that’s resistant to them.

If you can defeat these warriors with your courage and wisdom, you shall be led to the summit, where the strongest Champion awaits.”

Well I was looking forward to using my courage and wisdom but this is a cakewalk.

Okay, last one. This one looks like a cagematch-type thing, and it opens up to let me in.

I could use my volcarona here, since it knows fly. But I’ve gotten this far without using any items so I’ll try my serperior instead.

You look familiar… Ah, yes. I met you at Twist Mountain.

Oh right, you’re that fucker! I forgot but I think I swore to feed you to my dragon over that. Thanks for the reminder.

The strength you are radiating is far greater now than before! Greetings, challenger. My name is Marshal. I am the No. 1 pupil of my mentor, Alder.

Oh yeah you’re gonna be dragoned.

In order to master the art of fighting, I’ve kept training. You’re also walking a similar path with your Pokémon. It is my intention to test you–to take you to the limits of your strength. Kiai!

L60 throh. It uses bulldoze for some reason. It doesn’t seem to have any moves that actually can hurt me properly. I get it down to almost nothing, then the trainer pulls out a full restore so I have to do it again.

L60 mienshao. At least this one’s bright enough to try a bounce instead. Wring out gets rid of most of its HP, though, and then zoroark finishes it off.

L62 conkeldurr. I’ll try out my jellicent. For some reason the pokemon’s carrying a flame orb. Of course, it’s knocked out by a single stone edge move. Zoroark? Nope, fainted. I send out my audino to have time for an item. It knocks it out. Probably should have just attacked it, it’s already most of the way down… Oh well. My volcarona kills it.

L60 sawk. I try fly. That halves its HP and then it knocks out my pokemon with a single rock slide. I send out my escavalier to finish things up.

L60 lucario. I revive my volcarona again and win.

There is no single strongest Pokémon or sole best combination… That’s why it is difficult to keep winning. However, I think a heart that desires strength and strives to grow stronger is a precious ideal. That is why I respect you–because you have these things.

Now… You have become the strongest Trainer in this Pokémon League. The statue in the central chamber will take you to the Champion’s room.

And indeed, it lowers me down into a vast empty area.