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  • Hello hello hello my dears! I hope you are all staying indoors. Mr. Act (who is asthmatic) and I (who is without an immune system) are both high-risk and terrified. Every time you think about going out, consider […]

    • perhaps most importantly for our typical reader, it’s really committed to making a farm sim that goes above and beyond in terms of race and gender.

      The first time I read this sentence, I parsed the “farm sim” part as being as important as the “gender and race” part, and I was like… “who here is that obsessed with farm sims”?

      I am the dumb.

  • Heads ups: the SMBC guy gives away PDFs of his books for free here. The haul includes but is not limited to Augie and the Green Knight, which was discussed on this blog before, as well as two comic collection […]

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  • Bonfire, which I reviewed years ago, is finally getting an expansion into a full game. The demo is out if you want to try it.

    Bonfire is a tactical roguelike RPG. I greatly enjoyed the original alpha, though […]

  • renoir became a registered member 1 month, 4 weeks ago

  • Last time, in a completely unforeseeable turn of events, it turns out that people starting a war over Harry’s actions want him dead.

    “Me?” I said.

    In fairness, the idea of Harry facing consequences for his […]

    • In order to end this conflict they wish to extradite you to an area of their designation for trial. A resolution that is, perhaps, distasteful, but may also be only just.

      I love how literally the only reason the wizards have a problem with this is that they don’t want to give the vampires shit. If only the vampires had given the White Council a way to save face and pretend like this was their decision, they might’ve had what they wanted.

      All that would be tragic if we’d seen anything whatsoever to suggest there was any reason to mourn the WC’s imminent demise, but.

      Also, if that was actually the setting that Jim Butcher wrote, and not just your vastly more interesting AU. We all know that Butcher’s comment about magic changing was just an excuse to justify the anti-technology thing he wrote in so that Harry couldn’t use computers and cell phones that’d shatter his noir aesthetic.

      And the events of the past three books established they do not intervene when regular humans are in the crossfire either

      They don’t intervene to protect the Masquerade, they don’t teach new wizards, and they don’t even seem to work as an organization to advance magical knowledge. What do they actually do, anyway? The Mages Association of Fate is more proactive than these guys. Hell, at least you can not be part of the Mages Association. These guys are worst than the Camarilla.

      Will we give one of our own to the vampires now and pretend that none of this has happened?

      Literally the best argument he could come up with. “We can’t give up a homie or we’ll look like punks.”

      When the rules are always being bent or broken for the worst reasons in favor of the worst people?

      Does it really count as being bent or broken when the rules were written in such a way to facilitate the worst people being the worst? Morgan’s biggest flaw was that he was Lawful instead of Good. Good would’ve sworded Harry long ago.

      Ebenezar claims that yeah, okay technically, but the vampires set Harry up.

      Offering someone the opportunity to commit a crime doesn’t count as entrapment. Even if I lead you into a locked room with your worst enemy tied to a chair, placed a gun in your hand, and left; if you shot him, you’d still be on the hook for murder. And that’s way further than what the vampires did. At best, they told Harry where his worst enemy was tied to a chair. He did the rest by himself.

      Note that Harry has given every indication of not learning his lesson – hell, he’s currently fucking up etiquette left and right in his own faction!

      Does it count as “fucking up” if you’re doing it on purpose? Harry isn’t making any mistakes, he is acting totally as he has intended.

      Harry follows with up by saying for him personally to face a consequence is also exactly like appeasing Hitler.

      While I can kinda see why the wizards would be skeptical of the vampires ending their aggression just because they got Harry (considering that they apparently used this as an excuse to launch a worldwide assault across several continents in a dramatically disproportionate response to what Harry did), that really doesn’t answer why that skepticism should stop Harry from seeing consequences for his actions. The tribal weakness thing does, of course, but I don’t think the argument put forth is about whether or not that consequence if faced. Appeasing the vampires won’t end the war, even if (unlike Hitler) appeasing their demands is the right thing to do.

      Here I was, figuring we had a responsibility to protect people.

      Wasn’t this problem caused by Harry killing a lot of people? Or was it the result of Harry’s inaction getting a lot of people killed? I forget.

      He reminds everyone that Harry is constantly spitting all over the idea of secrecy

      He forgot to remind them that Harry apparently only turned up to this meeting to spit all over the idea of their traditions, culture, and procedures.

      By Council law, I am therefore entitled to an in-depth investigation and trial—”

      “And that, lady and gentlemen, is why you can’t hand me over to the vampires to stand trial for my crimes!”

      “Wait,” Ebenezar interjected. “I invoke my right as a member of the Senior Council to reduce the vote to the Senior Council alone.”

      His right as a member of the privileged few of the privileged many to exclude the privileged many from the vote. Forget normal humans, even most wizards don’t have rights in this system.

      On the grounds that there exists a great deal of information about this matter of which the Council at large is unaware.

      Isn’t that literally the purpose of a trial?

      His face was puffy and swollen, and his hands looked like rotten sausages about to burst. Frost clung to his hair in a thick coating, and his robe looked like it had been dipped in water and then dragged behind a sled team from Anchorage to Nome. His lips were blue, and his eyes fluttered and rolled semicoherently.

      I wonder if Butcher is going to see the irony of the White Council increasing aggression with the White Court over this while defending Harry’s actions from the Red Court. Apprentice or not, even a half-wizard is worth more than a fae.

      “We tried to take him for treatment, but he got so worked up
      about it I was afraid he would hurt himself, so we brought him to you, Ancient.”

      I wonder how hard they tried to take him for treatment. Like, natural human reaction would be to get him to a doctor, but natural wizard reaction seems to just let him do what he wants because it’s really no skin off their back if he loses all his fingers. You’d think the people most likely to get in magic fights would have more magical healing, but maybe that’s just not a thing in this setting?

      By all appearances Mr. Very Tall is making it so Harry can hear his words and other people can’t and Harry’s doing nothing on his end.

      You’d really think that the wizards would set up something so people can’t mentally DM each other in their council meetings, but okay!

      You can’t go on about a cowl and then tell me they’re wearing gloves designed to cover every bit of exposed flesh and not make me think it’s to hide something more important that a bit of scarring

      I thought he was so he could have a vague middle eastern or possibly Indian character without actually having Crazy Hassan of Hassan’s Discount Camel Rentals showing up as well.

      Let Dresden address Queen Mab’s request. Let him secure the assistance of Winter.

      Imagine how much closer you’d be to being done with this book if Harry had just done the job he’d agreed to do in Chapter 1 the first place. Hell, if you cut out all the parts of the last three books that were nothing but getting Harry to do the job he’d agreed to do in Chapter 1 in the first place, you’d probably be on Book 7 by now.

      You expect the youngest wizard in the Council to get the best of Queen Mab somehow?

      Wait, isn’t the Council like their word for the Wizard Association? Does that mean that literally no one younger than Harry has been recognized as someone that matters?

      How is he even supposed to know what her request was to begin with?

      So, do you think this is also part of Eb’s game, or do you think he actually isn’t aware Mab requested Harry do something for her?

      Harry, instead, explains that actually he’s already got this halfway in the bag. 

      God, is it a bad thing that I’ve already forgotten what Mab wanted from Harry besides making him hurt himself for shits and giggles?

      But some little part of me that hadn’t let me forget all the destruction, maybe even the deaths I’d caused last year, danced gleefully at my apparent comeuppance.

      Notice how Harry doesn’t realize the name for that little part of him is “his fucking conscience”. No, Harry, it’s not maybe. It’s all the death and destruction you’d caused last year.

    • They oppose consequences for Harry because it sets a precedent that could lead to consequences for themselves.

      Recent real life example of this would be the Houston Astros. They got caught cheating in a previous season up to and including their first World Series victory, but ended up with a slap on the wrist because player unions and franchise managers didn’t want to give whatever authority the ability to mete out harsher punishments. So that’s a joke. 

      So the WC is a pack of people used to thinking they’re better than everyone else and the rules shouldn’t apply to them and never bothered with diplomacy and allies.  And somehow, while they weren’t looking, everything changed.

      A main character reached protagonist age and needed level-appropriate challenges. It happens to the best of institutions as well as the worst. Seriously, the setting is pretty thin at the best of times, but the WC is just threadbare.

      When the rules are always being bent or broken for the worst reasons in favor of the worst people? Really reminds you of how great fairness and order are.

      Later in the post it’ll turn out the rules were written by the worst to favor themselves, but yeah. Good stories can get lots of mileage out of the whole Lawful vs. Good question, but Dresdenverse has nowhere near established a good track record at anything but warping the world around Harry.

      Yeah, I think they’re not wizard police but something more like all-purpose first responders.

      Huh, yeah, the Wardens are actually behaving decently when they don’t have names. Reminds me of the anonymous cops being good dudes, even heroes, in the previous books. Heck, the battered apprentice clearly has some iron in him, too. I wonder if there’s this issue where, once Butcher has to assign a name to someone, he also has to give them a character trait or two, and he’s just awful at dealing with them once he’s forced to put in that much work.

      Harry follows with up by saying for him personally to face a consequence is also exactly like appeasing Hitler.

      Wow, we’ve moved on from Harry appropriating harm done to women (that ‘pillar of salt’ crack and whatever else) to Harry appropriating harm done by white people to minorities. Yeah, if this is the price of diversity, just make everyone white.

      Yeah, his horrible comeuppance of getting a task handed to him that not only makes him super important but will let him avoid any actual comeuppance.

      We’re approaching peak levels of Sue bullshit here. Mab’s deal is letting Harry get out of his White Council political crisis (that he seemed to have better-than-even odds of Sueing his way out of anyway) as well as relieving him of his obligations to her. I’m guessing the personal convenience won’t end there.

    • Good stories can get lots of mileage out of the whole Lawful vs. Good question, but Dresdenverse has nowhere near established a good track record at anything but warping the world around Harry.

      That’s because Lawful is considered evil for opposing Harry (a lawbreaker) and Good is apparently Chaotic Neutral according to Harry and Lawful Catholic according to Michael.

      … Are there any other characters the series considers good?

      • Murphy seems to be a genuinely Good character, showing a sense of selflessness and duty that would make her the hero of a better work. We’ve also seen Murphy engage in completely justified Lawfulness that even Harry occasionally admits is in the right, like when she kicks his ass and handcuffs him in the first book for holding out on her about Linda Randall.

        • I suppose, but she doesn’t typically get protagonist-tier roles to play, because she’s not in a better work. In that regard, she’s more like those selfless, and nameless, police officers who selflessly, and namelessly, play out their predefined NPC roles. Of course Murphy has these traits, they’re the traits of the supporting role the book has for her, unlike proactiveness.

    • The central conflict of this chapter is Butcher desire to portray Harry as an underdog sticking it to the Man colliding with his love for the trappings of power. Harry is presented as an unjustly persecuted outsider to the corrupt system, but he is also a noble (possibly a head of House Dresden, to go full fanfiction cliche) enjoying privileges few are afforded.

      This also accounts for the weirdness with the presentation of the WC. It comes across as tribalistic, cynical and seemingly existing to perpetuate itself, but I don’t think that’s the intended reading here. The Council is presented to us as a collection of people who may be antagonistic to Harry (because he needs to face an unjust opposition) but also aren’t all bad, and there are people in his corner as well. This is because the book cannot afford to commit to the WC being straight-up evil because then Harry wouldn’t be able to enjoy being a part of this elite group. Since Harry is one of them, they must be alright, on balance.

      This, I think, accounts for the book dancing around the moral issues of killing vampires. The WC can’t take any stance on it because that would put them firmly into a villainous or heroic role, which will destroy the Schrodinger’s underdog of Harry. The book constrains itself to talk only in realpolitic terms because it makes it easy to conceal the moral character of people involved and bend it as the narrative demands.

      Like, imagine an exchange along the following lines:

      Harry: But what about all the people vampires have killed and continue to kill even now?

      The Merlin: And what about them?

      You wouldn’t be able to turn away from something like that and say, oh, well, the WC isn’t all that bad, really, it’s fine Harry is one of them (and will go on to become a Warden and enforce their rules).

      In the process, of course, it creates blind spots that, when exposed, turn the WC into an organization that is at best useless and at worst monstrous.

      Case in point:

       I particularly like that she felt she needed to mention he’s a “fully ranked wizard”, so, one of those have-nots Harry’s been sneering at in past books? Yeah, they’d be vampire chow.

      This is canon. Or, to be more precise, vampires wouldn’t have the need to petition the WC in the first place to get them. Random people outside of the WC, be they ordinary people or various magic users, have no rights in the magic society. Vampires can just take them, and I’m pretty sure the WC would just have to suck it up if they even cared in the first place.

      Not sure about wizard apprentices, but I’d assume they’re considered legal property of their masters or something along those lines (maybe more of an extension of their masters in spirit, but with more leeway in their treatment), so killing them is a slight agaist a wizard, but obviously less bad than murdering a person.

      • Which makes it all the weirder, considering that would be the perfect way to portray the White Council if you wanted to make them the analogue to the police of a noir story. Having Harry be in favour of the idea of the WC, and working towards that end, but not necessarily a fan of what they are, and stymieing that when needed, is pretty much what a noir detective is supposed to be doing to law enforcement.

    • I was fine with one as an FYI, but we’re not a place for you to advertise. I’m going to start marking these as spam if you keep doing this.

      wtf is it with dresden fans and doing this

      • We’re talking about DF a lot, therefore we must be fans.

        TBF, we did write a number of fics about DF, so I guess we count as DF-adjacent.

        • I think what she means is more like, why do the DF fans spam advertisements for the new books or for other, more positive forms of engagement. Like, other works that we hate-read don’t attract the sort of folks that advertise.

          • Yeah, we’ve never had people like, linking to Hunger Games jewelry or whatever.

            Though now that I think about it, DF fans having weird problems with boundaries does kind of make sense…

  • Farla wrote a new post, NaRe 2020 Day 23 2 months ago

    And so we finish! More of the people and pokemon and humans in a number of different ways.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13488895/1/The-Peak (2)

    [The sheer cloth was constructed from heat-trapping […]

    • Very Not My Thing Thanks.

      Wow, I expected something far more disgusting than this!

      It is extremely rare you want to have your characters talk in circles about how they’re not actually saying anything.

      This reminds me of an example from The Three Musketeers about how its author got paid by the line, so they had about six lines confirming that, yes, they’re going to the city, and city is Paris, and they’re going there.

      • Thank you!! someone left ‘ummm this story makes no sense’ and it bummed me out to read that.

        This is why comment culture is dead.

      • Wow, thanks for sharing. I got completely spammed with those ‘Down with critics united reviews’ back in 2018 and now I can finally do something about it.

        Kind of crazy that ffnet is this easy to manipulate though.

        • Yeah I’d like to make a greasemonkey extension to extract the review ID from the report/reply buttons so that it turns into a single button press, I have literally hundreds of the critics united signed-in spam reviews.

      • I can’t believe people are so surprised FFN didn’t notice this for seven years. They probably would’ve noticed it a lot faster if it was a widespread piece of knowledge on the site. If FFN’s users are anything like the Ao3 users I’ve seen who have reacted in amazement to learn that they didn’t have to write their stories in HTML because they’d been missing the “Rich Text” button for literal years, I’m not surprised that no one figured this out for so long.

  • Farla wrote a new post, NaRe 2020 Day 22 2 months ago

    More wonky grammar than usual. Someone being nice to a magikarp, though!

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13488190/1/This-is-why-you-don-t-mess-with-a-god-kids (1)

    Capitalize your title correctly.

    [ “Try […]

    • So, a weird thing about dialogue, if you lead in with a narration sentence you treat the start of the dialogue like a new sentence – [Yellow asked, “I-it’s getting] even though when it’s dialogue followed by narration, the narration isn’t treated like a new sentence.

      Something about the way this explanation is written is just… wonky to me. I’m not quite able to figure out what you mean by it.

      That’s like your fingers getting tangled together.

      … Well… it is a magikarp, after all.

    • While this is at least in his own region

      booooo

  • A story about Natural Harmony, a tropius.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13486129/1/People-and-Humans (3)

    Oh, that is a lovely phrase I will have to start using every chance I get.

    I really, really […]

    • Ooh, that got fucked up fast, and it’s nice to now see more empathy out of poor Ben. Really curious what Raikou’s agenda here is.

      … Since I’m FGO playing trash, my immediate thought was “Minamoto no”, and horror.

      Welp.

    • Seriously, why. What are you even doing. There are no pages here.

      OK, what the fuck happened here? At first I thought they probably just copied a Word document with a fancy table of contents and so on, but then I actuallty checked it out and, like, you’d need 24 size fonts to make page numbers fit. No way those chapters take up four pages each.

      • I could tell you that. The prologue (which he says is two pages) is only a single screen long. After I set the story width to half-width, and only if you count the Privacy Policy banner that FFN wants me to accept as the bottom of the page.

    • The grammar guide is even better, and goes into more detail on edge cases.

  • More fics brushing up against the “people and pokemon” issue, but all in a different way than usual. Run-on sentences long enough to strangle. A story about a hacked pokemon who still functions like their own […]

    • [I mean…you understand that corpses are very unchaotic, right? Living things involve a degree of change.]

      Reminds me of how in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld books, the Auditors of Reality are always trying to end humanity, because we make things messy and disordered.

  • A story about someone who’s getting strongarmed into not being a trainer, a story about someone kicked out of home for wanting to be a trainer, gardevoir continue to be a magnet for people’s shitty thoughts on […]

    •  gardevoir continue to be a magnet for people’s shitty thoughts on gender

      Ironically, doesn’t the ralts like canonically read just, like… passively people’s minds and avoid people it with thoughts it doesn’t want to be near? That sounds like a skill I’m pretty sure  every woman who has been on a tinder date would kill for.

      working together like a small tribe

      A tribe would also imply some sense of shared extended family. Just looking at her adoptive father, he has two natural kids. If one of those kids had a kid, and then died, that kid would still have at the very least a grandfather as well as an uncle or aunt. Was her mother an only child with two dead only-child parents?

      “not exactly a fangirl” means something closer to “I dislike the man” than “is great but not to the point I’m obsessed with him”

      Which is really weird, when you think about it.

  • Murloc became a registered member 2 months, 1 week ago

  • A Mewtwo fic that seems to be taking the side of “people and pokemon” as well as better written but more creepy porn.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13483318/1/Inteleon-s-Search-and-Rescue-Agency (0)

    [The […]

    • This is because kids don’t have sex ed anymore and are learning entirely from porn, isn’t it.

      Hey, you can’t blame porn for this. I’m pretty sure even most bimbo porn is written with more care and thought than this.

      • And Pokemon itself is written with more care than this. It is roughly as good at being pokemon fiction as it is being bimbo porn.

        • I’d debate that too. This is clearly intended to be bimbo porn, and yet it bears absolutely nothing to do with pokemon except the names of characters. Thus, it is actually way better at being bimbo porn than it is being pokemon fanfiction.

  • Two fics with possibly unreliable pokemon narrators about how awesome trainers are, porn, low effort writing.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13483020/1/Harbinger-of-Happiness (1)

    You wouldn’t capitalize a […]

    • I couldn’t ask for a better partner

      The line is in black, making it unreadable.

      Otherwise, I kinda wonder if the whole slavery issue is a fandom loyalty coupled with the lack of critical thinking. Like, do people just enjoy Pokemon and then go on to justify iffy elements because they don’t want to feel bad about enjoying something Problematic (even if maybe intellectually they kinda get that it’s an issue), or is the idea of owning people is in itself the appeal here?

      • I think, less than wanting to justify iffy elements, it’s more a matter of… those iffy elements don’t exist within the logic of the setting. That logic of the setting is different than our own world, however.  In the setting of Pokemon, all pokemon are okay with being captured and trained, because of course they are; they need to be in order for the setting’s premise to work right. That’s why the story of Black and White had the problem it did. It tried to address that logical disconnect between what the setting presents and what our own real world logic would suggest would happen, without actually changing the logical disconnect, because it needs that disconnect to function properly.

        • To make it even more of a problem, the iffy elements are in canon, just inconsistently!

          First gen, pokemon always approached you to fight, with the exception of four pokemon where you walked up to them to say hi and got attacked. Second gen introduces “fleeing”, along with pokeballs to force pokemon clearly want nothing to do with you to be yours anyway, and happiness mechanics. The happiness mechanics get updated in third gen and on to involve the idea different pokemon start at different levels of dislike for you, including buneary that start off seething with abject hatred (and ralts/kirlia start at just one tier higher, so they absolutely want nothing to do with you, they’re just one tick short of hating you with literally every fiber of their being). And later gens also introduced elements of stalking pokemon instead of them attacking you, first with rustling grass and then actually having to sneak up on the pokemon or else they’ll flee.

          But there’s no way to actually engage with any of those elements. You don’t know why pokemon feel that way and you can’t tell if this is an actual opinion they have or if it’s like a half-feral cat where once they calm down they’ll enjoy their new life and while you can opt out of some of them you have to play significantly against the grain and the game won’t even notice.

          • That’s why, I think, on the whole, pokemon would benefit from more animalistic pokemon. Taming feral animals with a high natural urge for combat is a lot less iffy than forcing sapient beings to fight.

        • One day I’m gonna put on my ANBU mask and do a youtube video about how N Was Right: the existence of kind and fair trainers does not excuse a system that’s set up without clear ways of looking for and stopping wrongdoing, and maybe even rewards abuse of pokemon, MUCH LIKE OUR OWN WORLD JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE NICE TO A POC DOESN’T MEAN THAT RACISM IS SOLVED thanks for coming to TED talk

      • It’s surprisingly hard to tease out.

        I know that when I brought up a variety of issues, like “the happiness mechanics involve a lot of stuff that trainers do that benefit the trainer so it doesn’t mean the trainer actually cares” people would be personally offended because they cared so much. And to change that would mean what they already did wasn’t good enough, so instead they dig in their heels and insist that no they’re saints.

        But I also think there’s a lot of self-selection going on, where the idea of having a friend that can’t say no, can’t leave you, can’t assert any boundaries…is very much the point.

      • Like, do people just enjoy Pokemon and then go on to justify iffy elements because they don’t want to feel bad about enjoying something Problematic

        I have a lot of empathy for people who balk at the various issues we’ve identified with pokemon training because, emphatically, it’s A Lot to consider, and I understand the reaction to the suggestion being hostile and Trainer Fragility-y (ha) and maybe even making you so mad that you go on a multi-sockpuppet campaign to try to smear the name of whoever suggested the idea to you in the first place (cough).

        It’s actually what made me stop writing the original Gods and Demons (well, + depression); I couldn’t justify how Moriko treated Vleridin the Mooskeg or how pokemon training worked until I rejigged the whole system (and now Moriko being abusive is a feature rather than a bug bc I like imperfect protagonists).

        So I understand why you might not even want to engage with it or have to narratively deal with all these independent pokemon personalities. That said, I don’t think the Pokemon Waifu types are thinking about it too hard either; they would be writing about indulgent Waifus ready to serve their every need (and I support your fetish, just please know the difference between fiction and reality) regardless of fandom (or original fiction, hahahaha literature is trash) and these ones that we see just happened to pick Pokemon.

        • I couldn’t justify how Moriko treated Vleridin the Mooskeg or how pokemon training worked until I rejigged the whole system

          This is how I feel writing classic style cyberpunk.

          I don’t think the Pokemon Waifu types are thinking about it too hard either

          Yeah, I definitely think that, regardless of what you think about Farla’s interpretation of why these stories are so popular, the overwhelming majority are doing it subconsciously, probably because it’s their fetish. It’d probably be better if they consciously realized why they were doing it, but as long as they remember to separate reality from fiction, they probably won’t hurt anybody.

          I seem to recall a conversation on this site once about how you can kind of tell when bondage/discipline fetish fic is being written by the person who wants to do the discipline or the person who wants to be disciplined, and I think that kinda applies here. If you’re doing it because it’s your fetish, and you know it’s just a fetish, and treat it accordingly, it doesn’t really do any harm.

          Maybe it came up when Butcher wrote that random mommydom scene in the third Dresden Files book?

    • Is this simply because it’s unfamiliar to wild because it only happens to trained pokemon

      This is actually a really interesting idea, and a good way to demonstrate how training is beneficial to pokemon. Some pokemon can literally only achieve their ultimate form with the assistance of humans.

      For my human. My human. Everything is for my human. And I am happy.

      Yeesh. This is… as the twitter people say… yikes.

      This story seems like it might be scratching against some good ideas and an interesting premise, but the author just isn’t quite aware of what they’re writing, or ready to tackle such a complex subject.

      • [Some pokemon can literally only achieve their ultimate form with the assistance of humans.]

        As a counterpoint to that, you should totally check out Almost Like Flying.

      • a good way to demonstrate how training is beneficial to pokemon. Some pokemon can literally only achieve their ultimate form with the assistance of humans.

        Well, it used to be relatively good evidence for training’s benefits, but that’s also gotten less clear ever since the SuMo pokedex established that mega evolution fucks pokemon up.

    • While hoping is for fools, my knee jerk reaction to the crobat one is that the narration is meant to at least make you question the crobat’s reliability. Are they really happy, or just Stockholmed into a kind of pseudo-humanity that works, but not totally?

      If that reading wasn’t intended this is a really weird piece.

       

      • It’s apparently supposed to be unreliable, but the author thinks it’s still hard to say if the choice was a good one even though if the narrator is unreliable there’s no confirmed upside to the evolution to balance all the downsides. It feels like it’s similarly running into the problem that pokemon aren’t expected to have the same rights/treatment, so the standards for “it’s fine, really” are much much lower.

  • More trainer stuff today, including what’s supposed to be a badass Ash fic that’s actually just his dad doing everything for him. Also yet another fic where pokemon are humans to an absurd degree and something I […]

  • Lot of low-effort stuff today.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13481167/1/Warriors-of-hope (0)

    Capitalize your title correctly.

    “Its” is possessive. “It’s” means “it is”.

    Write out numbers with […]

  • A surprising lack of people waking up in the morning. There’s some uncomfortable childishness tied to gore and porn, some quality grimdark, and some apparently inadvertent grimdark […]

    • So, this is the sort of fic I feel people have in mind when they say stop criticizing children, and the author’s note talks about being in college.

      What do you mean by this?

      Following up on the above, this person may well be in college or even older! But even if they are it’s still squicky that they apparently have all the coherency of a middle schooler.

      I was going to say “Well, ‘What!? No!’ would literally be my response in that situation”, but than I thought to see what happens in literally the next sentence after your quote, and… yeeeeeeeeeeeah.

      Literally my first attempt at writing porn ever was better than this. I wouldn’t be able to imagine this person being in college or older, even if I hadn’t checked their profile and found Lego Ninjago porn.

      • ohmygod the next sentence

        idk what I was expecting but it was definitely not that

      • The fic was written in an exceptionally childish/simple way: this happened. this happened. this happened. If I was to guess the author’s age from their writing, I’d think they were quite young because it’s laid out like a young kid would. What’s likely actually going on isn’t that this is the absolute best that can be expected of them (as would be true of a young enough kid, since there’s certain things the brain just can’t do at earlier stages) but someone who’s capable of far more but hasn’t had any practice, so they haven’t moved beyond where they were when they were younger.

        …the pokeporn person is probably actually a kid because everything I’ve heard of Lego Ninjago is it’s very precisely targeted at kids and doesn’t waste much space on also throwing in stuff older audiences would enjoy.

        • someone who’s capable of far more but hasn’t had any practice, so they haven’t moved beyond where they were when they were younger

          God, I feel this. Sentence variation, what is it?

          the pokeporn person is probably actually a kid

          Yeah, I could believe that first one is an adult who just isn’t that great a writer, but even if you showed me undeniable proof that the pokeporn author was an adult, I’d still have trouble believing it. My first time writing porn was better than that, but my first time writing porn was also well into my twenties.

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