One more thing: QR code to get the shiny charm through mystery gift! Unlike the pokemon ones, this may hypothetically cause issues if you ever manage to collect every single pokemon and Birch attempts to give you it. If you aren’t going to do that, it’s really not an issue.
While I get the idea of unlockables for completing the pokedex, having unlockables that have to do with grinding your way through pokemon be walled behind grinding your way through pokemon really doesn’t make sense to me. They should just give you a damn mew already.
Anyway, I explore Verdanturf today.
Inside the pokemart, one person says, They don’t sell any items that will let you win contests… It means you have to raise Pokemon diligently on an everyday basis. If by that you mean raise berries diligently, then yeah I guess. Also, this suggests that pokemon battles aren’t about raising pokemon diligently, which is pretty weird.
Outside an old guy tells me about how the air’s great due to the volcanic ash being blown the other way. And it’s interesting that there doesn’t appear to be any talk about human related pollution, isn’t there.
I go to where Wally isn’t.
Oh! So you did come to visit! If you’re looking for Wally, though, I’m afraid he’s gone. After he lost you in Mauville, he said he had to train more, and we haven’t seen him since. It must be his Pokemon that have lit such a fire in that boy and given him so much hope to live for…
So when Wally’s trying to have a pokemon battle in a public location where there’s no risk and even if something did somehow go wrong there’d be bystanders to help, you insist it’s too dangerous. But when Wally runs off to train alone in an isolated area full of wild pokemon, that’s fine.
There’s a contest hall. Not sure what the point of multiple ones is when you can do every level of contest at each one, but inside this one is a girl who had pokemon attracted to her and then she gives me the attract TM and yeeeah.
And by the side of the tunnel, a girl says, My papa told me this tunnel is full of timid Pokemon that get all scared of loud noises and make a big uproar! So they had to stop the big tunnel project, but there’s one man who’s still trying to dig the tunnel by himself!
Now, this doesn’t make a lot of sense given they’re soundproof, but they could easily be disturbed by people in general. Also, note that this is less “for the sake of the pokemon” and more “we can’t do this because they keep attacking us”.
I go through the tunnel and come out to find some blackglasses, then talk to a guy who says he’s looking for his glasses, checks out what I found to say that’s not it, and somehow knows that therefore his glasses are nowhere near and leaves. Someone makes abrupt decisions.
Flare and I then make our way through the tunnel. Luckily I taught him rock smash so he can’t just lose to the geodude and be done with it.
Blah blah girlfriend boyfriend blah yet another mega stone and then I get through and there’s the scientist guy.
It’s you! You’re that Trainer who helped me in Petalburg Woods and also got back my case that was stolen and then graciously delivered it to Slateport! Captain Stern informed us that the case arrived safely! I thank you very, very much. If I were a rain cloud, I would shower you with gratitude and hail you as a heroine. For you, most wonderful Trainer, I bear good news! Recently, our company developed a new kind of Poke Ball. As a token of our appreciation for all of your help, we would like to give you one!
And now I have a repeat ball. A repeat ball.
Please do try it out! Thank you and bye-bye!
I’d like something more like “free pokeballs forever”. I mean, the cost of the things isn’t a big deal in game currency so it wouldn’t be gamebreaking, and the price in yen isn’t much either so they’re not intended to be expensive.
Okay, so nothing else around here I guess. I’ll go back to giant apparently very new city and try going forward.
Ah, Team Magma grunts.
Where are we supposed to be, um… Where are we going, again?
It’s Mt. Chimney! Stay spaced out, and you’ll get scolded by Maxie!
Mt. Chimney… It’ll be a long walk going along Route 112 to get there. I wish I’d brought some snacks…
With that parting whine, they head off.
Beyond is the Winstrates family. I make Flare fight them all, but he finally goes down to the final meditite, which then tears through the rest of my team of filler pokemon – nincada manages to get it down to a sliver, though. When I’m down to the last, I use my max revive on Flare and he just barely survives the hit to finish it off.
Well, that was fun! I like that the family is father, wife, daughter, grandmother – I was expecting the final uber trainer to be a son.
…and I go in and they all tell me their son is way better than any of them. Arg.
Nincada’s evolved.
Ninjask moves around at such a high speed that it cannot be seen, even while its crying can be clearly heard. For that reason, this Pokemon was long believed to be invisible.
Shedinja’s hard body doesn’t move–not even a twitch. In fact, its body appears to be a mere hollow shell. It is believed that this Pokemon will steal the spirit of anyone peering into its hollow body from its back.
This always seems like a weird entry given they know the player has sees the backs of their own pokemon.
New team:
L21 Flare 
L14 magnemite 
L19 zubat
L19 whismur
L13 gulpin
L17 shroomish
A backpacker tells me that pokemon are more lively when you take them out into wilder areas, and then concludes, Sure enough, Pokemon fit better in nature than in a city. Given the general state of things is for nature to give way to those, doesn’t sound good for pokemon.
Oh hey it’s Brendan.
So it’s you, Lucki. You see that mountain up there? That’s Mt. Chimney.
Ooh, and the camera shifts to show it, although immediately afterward Brendan covers the actual volcano with his dumb speech bubble.
I dunno, but… But seeing it for real is, like… Like a punch in the gut, you know?
Uh, no. Not sure why it’s like that to you.
Hope I might get to take the Cable Car up to the top someday…
Now I’m just more confused.
Hey, Lucki, doesn’t your team seem a bit worse for wear?
Flare’s missing like five HP, game.
Here. I’ll help them out for you.
Why are you such a terrible rival.
And why don’t you take this?
And now I have strength.
I bet you can find all kinds of ways to use it in the mountains that lie ahead! Oh… But it won’t work out here if you don’t have a Badge from the Lavaridge Gym. Bah! This is no time to be giving you tricks!
Huh? “Tips”, I’d think.
I’m supposed to be heading to Fallarbor to visit Professor Cozmo right now! See you later, Lucki. Next time, let’s have a battle, OK?
NO DAMMIT GET BACK HERE
Little coward runs away.
Well, fine then, Into the tall grass I go. A numel appears and Flare crits it to death.
More faintings. Now my whismur is evolving.
Loudred’s bellowing can completely decimate a wood-frame house. It uses its voice to punish its foes. This Pokémon’s round ears serve as loudspeakers.
Machop’s muscles are special–they never get sore no matter how much they are used in exercise. This Pokemon has sufficient power to hurl a hundred adult humans.
It’s always so hard to make sense of how strong a given pokemon is. Machop is the first stage, yet it’s apparently some sort of untiring robot capable of absurd feats of strength.
Numel is extremely dull witted–it doesn’t notice being hit. However, it can’t stand hunger for even a second. This Pokemon’s body is a seething cauldron of boiling magma.
Also, isn’t it interesting how the games repeatedly connect “stupid” and “unable to feel pain”?
Anyway, naturally Team Magma is blocking the easy way up, and so long as they don’t challenge me to a battle they’re unstoppable so I go through the tunnel instead.
Then I run across some weirdo standing by a tree.
Mmm-mm. I can smell it. I can smell it right here… The scent of adventure! This is definitely one. It’s gotta be a Secret Spot.
Hm, so that odd looking area near the very beginning…?
There’ll be enough space here to build a crazy super place, or my name’s not Aarune!
Oh wait no we’re talking about secret bases right.
Well you don’t look like a crazy psycho at all.
Yo, my young Pokemon Trainer! What can I do you for, hmm?
Come any close and I will end you, weirdo.
Huh? What d’you mean, you didn’t ask for anything? Bet your heart did! Now, now, no need to be shy! After all, we managed to meet!
NO MEANS NO
The name’s Aarune. Put’er there.
No touching.
Unova-born, and twenty-five years old. Spent the last 11 years trying to find myself.
…
So you write out twenty-five and then use numerals for eleven and oh god I will strangle the next person who argues it’s right because the games did it.
Just a vagabond in search of dreams. I’m wandering ’round Hoenn, trying to find a place where I really belong. That’s right! A Super-Secret Base! You don’t know about Secret Bases? Too sad, little sis. Time for a little lecture from Uncle Aarune!
Seriously I have no problem ordering my fire dog to chew your balls off.
Let’s start with what a Secret Base is… Which is adventure! Romance!
WHY IS THERE NO “CALL POLICE” OPTION
Awesome! For real, it’s the best place ever to chill–you, your pals that you let hang out…
NO NO NO NO NO
Since you’ve got this chance, you oughta learn how to make one. Take this. Secret Power can help you find the entrances to hidden places. These entrances… They’re full of adventure, all right! That’s why I like to throw some spice in there and call ’em Secret Spots!
Then Lucki walks over to him no Lucki what are you doing.
Like this! See? This right here is a Secret Spot.
Okay but if I could be serious for a moment, look at this disaster of a scene. He just will not shut up. It’s redundancy layered upon redundancy.
Doesn’t it look like you could just climb right up this tree? This is exactly the kinda place to bust out with Secret Power! Awww yeah! I never get tired of that! And that’s all there is to finding Secret Spots and creating the entrance to a Secret Base. This move is crucial to having a Secret Base. Don’t forget, now!
ARG NOW HE’S LED LUCKI INTO HIS SECRET LAIR NO NO NO NO NO NO
Mm-hmmm! Not a bad layout… See, behind each Secret Spot, you’ll find a space like this. They come in all kindsa shapes and sizes. So basically, whenever you find a Secret Spot, you oughta at least check it out with Secret Power! Just think… Someday this place could be somebody’s Secret Base, all decorated and filled with goods and friends… I’d really love to see that.
Which is why there is no chance in hell I’ll be using this one.
Wait a sec… But who in the world are you? … Ahhh! Right! Lucki! Sorry about that. I jjust got on such a roll… So then, Lucki! How about I give you one more tip? When you feel happy about something, you oughta express that feeling. Put it in words! It’ll cheer everybody up. So how ‘about you tell me, huh? C’mon. Tell Uncle Aarune what you say when you’re totally thrilled!
GO AWAY YOU PEDO fits perfectly. But I get told I can’t enter “that word”.
Whistle… I’LL CASTRATE U? That’s good! Know why I asked you that? Isn’t it obvious? It’s ’cause I can see already that there’s plenty in your future to feel happy about! That’s just how we roll in the Secret Base life. Every day is full of happy adventures! Aw yeah! Hmm. Now, I could go ahead and make a Secret Base right here, but… I get the feeling that this layout could be even better for you, little sis.
TAKE THE HINT
Guess I’m gonna leave this spot for you!
The screen goes dark a moment, and then there’s stuff there.
This will be your Secret Based from now on, little pal!
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
It’s yours now, so decorate it, destroy it, do whatever you want! Whatever floats your boat, right? Oh, right. Decorating!
I don’t know what’s more horrifying, the words he’s saying or how this tutorial will not end.
See, any Decorations you get will be sent to the PC in your Secret Base automatically. Place ’em around and liven up your base a bit. That there’s a PC! That’s where you’ll find your Decorations. Not that you probably have much, right? Here, I’ll give you these to get ya started! Oh, RIGHT! One last thing! You can do more than make your own Secret Base. You can visit other people’s bases for a bit of fun. If you find a base that belongs to someone else, check it out. And here’s the real point. When you check out someone’s base, collect the flat you find next to the PC. Heh heh… Something good might some of it! Looks like it’s about time for me to hit the road in search of my perfect base! Good-bye for now, but hopefully I’ll see you again, Lucki. If you need me for anything, try dropping in at the Secret Base Guild in Fortree!
As soon as I figure out how to order my pokemon to kill.
Well, that sure motivated me to go find a secret base of my own.
Oh my God, why did they do that? “Oh, we’re remaking third gen Pokemon games? You know what I always thought was a shame? That the secret base guy didn’t have a name or a back-story but did have the ability to shut up and leave the player character alone. Let’s change that. Let’s change all of that.”
Is anything about these remakes actually an improvement?
They probably assumed graphical improvements were the be-all and end-all and just forgot everything else. Which, to be fair, is often the attitude of the gaming industry these days, so I can’t rightly say they’re worse than everyone else about it.
I could never understand why people care about graphics so much. Once they got to the point where they weren’t eyeball-breakingly ugly, what did it matter? People have proven themselves capable of getting emotionally invested in tiny little pixel blobs.
I mean, me and my brother were impressed with the cutscenes in FF8, a long time ago, so maybe it’s some emotional experience I stopped having. But ‘look, you can see every hair on that guy’s head’ will never impress me that much. I can see realistic hair in real life, and it isn’t interesting there either.
I mean, I understand it in some cases. It’s not so much graphics as it is the “look” of the game. Like Shadow of the Colossus needed to look grand and idyllic and beautiful, to drive home the point that you were doing a bad thing by going there and killing colossi. Graphics aren’t a bad thing in that case. People are always holding up that specific game as art, and I’d argue that the graphics were necessary to achieve that effect.
In Pokemon, I’d say it’s useless, sure.
I really like pretty graphics but it seems counterproductive at times. The screen is so small that moves towards slight realism can just end up muddling things more than sticking to a stylized form.
Yeah, style is pretty much always more important than accurate approximation of life. Games like LoZ: Wind Waker have serious longevity, graphically, because of their very simple art. It looks just as good now as it does then. Same with WoW. It got away with nearly a decade of almost no graphical improvement because the look of it was just always functional. Goofy and chunky, but functional. Blizzard as a whole just has some fucking style. I’m playing a game they haven’t even officially released yet, where it’s basically League of Legends but with iconic characters from Blizz’s franchises, and it’s goddamn amazing. But anyway.
Yeah, it can be counterproductive, is me agreeing with you in five words or less.
Oh yeah, I have nothing against games set up with a specific style to look pretty. It’s the school of thought that consists of ‘this is yet another dull as fuck FPS but look at how realistic the blood-stained grass is, play our DAFFPS’ that I don’t understand.
Well, when you’re releasing the same game over and over, all you can do is laud the graphical improvements.
No, if that was the case they wouldn’t have added in all the ridiculous dialogue.
I wonder if perhaps the issue is that there’s teams working on these that don’t want to be and would rather be doing more characterizationy RPGs, so they take every chance they can get to write more dialogue.
I would take a different interpretation and say they resent the characterization they feel like they have to add to please whoever seriously eats this shit, and make it as stilted and perfunctory as possible.
Like, if they’re earnestly wanting to make more characterization, then I’m almost glad they’re being bound to Pokemon games, which I’m not going to consume, especially not for the characterization, rather than something I’d want to enjoy.
I can’t imagine they don’t want to, because the whole problem is they will not shut up. It started in XY where they had a whole key item just to let people call you so you could watch them talking to each other about the same subject every five seconds while you were trying to save the world.
Point. Maybe they gave an enthusiastic intern a quota. Would be the worst of both worlds.
Basically pretty graphics and the DexNav. Though… I don’t know if I blocked it out or something, but I have no recollection of this despite being 100% sure I made a base.
You may have just spammed A because it’s not your burden to make a LP of it.
Yeah, it’s pretty obvious immediately that nothing he says will matter and I was seriously tempted to just skip it without reading.
All of my sympathy, Farla. All of it.
If this DexNav is useful and functional I kind of don’t want to get attached to it. I hate the way modern pokemon games keep providing cool things only to take them away next game. Like your pokemon following you around, that marker indicating when you’d caught every pokemon in a patch of grass, being able to change clothes….
With HGSS I figured that they didn’t have time to program following animations when making the current games and fair enough, they could save it for the remakes. But nope. And the dex thing from BW2 was useful and I’m sure not difficult to include. (May was always my favourite girl protagonist so maybe I’m just annoyed I don’t get to dress her in cool outfits.)
As is my understanding, this is the result of different design teams working on different pokemon games at the same time to push the release dates closer together. I would have rather waited longer and had a May who I could dress in jeans with a mudkip following her around, but I guess Gamefreak/Nintendo want my money a lot more than they want to give me what I want.
But yeah, it basically means I don’t trust any improvement they put in to stick around.
I was so relieved they let you run away from contest girl in the other tutorial, I never realized how bad this one was. On an unrelated note I spent like an hour flailing to run away from the b2w2 hall of movies or whatever. I did something wrong and they made me do the long awful movie thing again anyway. At least this one you can pound A for a couple minutes and he goes away forever.
Jesus Christ, Mr. Secret Base is like the skeeviest dude if you play a girl. I wonder how much the script changes if you play a guy? That exact script
may just sound like annoying hippy all-loving crap if you play a boy. I’ve got no desire to find out, though.
So then, Lucki! How about I give you one more tip?
Does anyone here watch Archer? I love that show.
Still pretty awful. But “Uncle” is something that pops up a lot when it’s pedophiles talking to little girls, while I don’t know if that’s standard for boys.
In the original Japanese he may have called himself something like Nii-san, which would be ‘big brother’ but also colloquially ‘mister’. I dunno. It was terribly localized one way or the other.
I think you start getting other players’ bases after this point when you connect to the internet, so watch out for the secret base spots elsewhere. The battles with the players inside can give you a challenge since you’re facing their own game teams.
Hm. I wonder what I should make Lucki’s team for that. I’m tempted to just say six L100 kyogre.
Mm, the shiny charm would be tempting if I hadn’t just obtained it the legitimate way over the weekend. (And now I have a shiny bouffalant. Because it’s clearly the shiny to get.)
His dialogue is basically the same as I remember it being for Salem. It’s still unsettling when it’s to a boy. Especially the “Uncle Aarune” shit.
I can only assume Japan has totally different standards for what sounds like DNW creepy.