Right, back to the plot.

AHHH NOW THE HOLOCLIP INVENTED BY THE CREEPY GUY IS FROM THE CREEPY GUY WHYYYYYYYYYY

Lysandre: Professor Sycamore told me you can now wield Mega Evolution. That is truly wonderful. With that power, you can steer your future in a better direction.

“Before, I was planning to murder you. But perhaps you may choose a more appropriate path where that isn’t necessary.”

We can’t just cover up the old filth with new filth!

Eeh, Serena, can you turn this thing off? You shouldn’t be listening to this man. He’s probably staring at your nonexistent chest while plotting to murder you if you ever hit puberty.

I implore you to consider what we need to do to change the world into a new, beautiful world!

I’m already in a changing the world relationship with N, thank you. Also, I don’t want a creep like you near Serena.

Mercifully, it ends before he starts discussing his plans to wear people’s skin. Continuing on.

How dare you keep us waiting! And it’s Skirt and Trousers. Ha! Just kidding, Trainer! Damn, you actually seemed halfway interesting for a second. We weren’t really waiting for you. We were on our way to the Power Plant at Professor Sycamore’s request.

So this game everyone’s paying attention to me, but I’m completely irrelevant to the plot, while last game everyone ignored me but at least I got world destroying god monsters.

But the gate connecting Luminose City to Route 13 has been shut by a mysterious power outage. We have to investigate.

And then Skirt jumps in: Hey! So there’s Central Kalos and Coastal Kalos, right? Can you tell me what comes next?

Trousers apparently just wants to get gone with this and take his coffee break: I’m just going to give you the answer. It’s Mountain Kalos. So I’m going to take this opportunity and power up your Pokedex again.

Hey, you know what’d have been a slightly better way of doing this? Something about storage capacity. Like, you can only fit data on a few dozen pokemon in the initial one, and if you get enough pokemon it’s upgraded to continue.

Skirt: You know… You look different somehow. Your face seems more…mature? Ha ha! Just joshing with you! I’ll be taking my leave now! Bon voyage!

Uh. Okay.

Hm. There was that water route earlier. I was thinking I’d end up going back that way, but now it seems like there’s a new area I’m to go to next, so I must have been meant to explore it then.

So, the water route!

Well, first, let’s get that lapras. And now I feel bad because he’s telling it how it’ll get to swim all over, and I don’t have any need for it. I think I’ll trade him.

They have gentle hearts. Because they rarely fight, many have been caught. Their number has dwindled.

It’s interesting that depopulation is now from captures and not whale hunting.

Some guy gives me a stone for amphados, so I guess they’ve got mega evolution now too.

Mantyke! First one breaks out of a half dozen ultraballs then knocks itself out, but I get the second easily enough.

The pattern on its back varies by region. It often swims in a school of Remoraid. The pattern here is a smiley face.

My brother told me how to evolve my inkay, and to answer all of you, no, it’s not that weird. Turning the 3ds upsidedown is actually really nice. The screen is now the bottom, so it’s resting against you, and then you’re holding the top. If your hands are getting sore from playing too long, it really helps. Also, just, what a fun and silly way to evolve! I think I can accept the difficulty given it’s so easy to trade in this generation.

And now I’ve got an upsidedown squidface! Malamar. Same typing, grouchier face.

It wields the most compelling hypnotic powers of any Pokemon, and it forces others to do whatever it wants.

Otherwise, this route is reminding me a lot of the traditional swim everywhere in samey blue. Actually, nostalgia’s making me enjoy it anyway – the main areas have been way too linear for my tastes – but I’ve got posts to write. Also, there’s sky trainers but I’ve only got a single flying type. I don’t know why making sure there’s plenty of /flying isn’t a bigger priority to the designers, when fly’s the one HM you always, always need. You only need surf at discrete intervals, waterfall and the unlamented whirlpool were even more niche, yet every new game, they roll out piles of water types. Plus non-water pokemon can sometimes learn surf. Fly? Not so much.

Anyway, let’s go to the main plot and I’ll come back here again later.

Ooooh, badlands! And a cool effect where you see pokemon moving around.

And hey, trapinch. He’s one level above my skiddo, so seems my team swapping is working.

It lives in arid deserts. It makes a sloping pit trap in sand where it patiently awaits prey.

And gible. So basically, this is the dragon desert.

It nests in horizontal hole warmed by geothermal heat. Foes who get too close can expect to be pounced on and bitten.

Dugtrio.

In battle, it digs through the ground and strikes the unsuspecting foe from an unexpected direction. That’s really boring.

This area’s kind of difficult. There’s lots of items hidden, but looking for them can get you jumped by the pokemon, who keep spawning and can sometimes make it hard to go two steps.

And there’s this wind effect that slows you a lot.

Eventually, I find a key card and also some Team Flare guy hanging out.

You may have beaten me…again and again. But like I always say, when I lose, I go out with style! So wait, this is the same guy? How many people are actually in Team Flare, five?

He then stylishly runs away. Or tries to.

Huh? Where’s my Power Plant Pass?! he spikyboxes. So he lost it. H-how in the world do you have a Power Plant Pass? So Serena responded to his howl of misery by pulling it out and smirking. I am liking how the game has dialogue actually shift based on your accomplishments – presumably, he wouldn’t be saying this if I hadn’t found it already. Aha! I’ll make a stylish deduction! You picked up the Power Plant Pass I dropped when I was checking out that big boulder! Aha! So the game would’ve hinted that I should check that out. And, what’s worse, you plan on going to the Power Plant, don’t you?! Can’t get into that shop unless the power goes back on so I can see the rest of the city, and I want to get Serena some nicer city clothes. So. Yes.

And then he just stands there. Go talk to him and rub it in, Serena.

This is stylishly bad! If someone found the Power Plant Pass I dropped while I was fumbling around by the big rock…and then that hypothetical someone proceeded to the Power Plant just past here… That would be seriously, stylishly a hot mess! Dammit game I just complimented you for having the character notice things. Having them do that then falling back on set dialogue is worse than not noticing it in the first place. There’s no reason he would have to know she had the pass.

But anyway. Let’s go in. I’m really curious what’s up with it.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? It’s some Team Flare grunt to complain I’m not authorized to be here. What, and you are?

Hm, also, this suggests the guy I fought outside is the one they always use to guard, because clearly I haven’t beaten this guy’s face in yet.

Team Flare is busy…redirecting…the power that’s supposed to go to Lumiose City, see? Don’t get in our way!

Then there’s a room full of people. One expresses disbelief that Serena’s the cavalry, since she’s just a kid. That’s more like it, game. Now I can prove my worth instead of just getting a head pat and told that they’re sure I’m a great trainer. (Serena is probably particularly hard to take seriously because I had her wear the halter top for her beach trip and forgot to change. Oh well, rescuing people can’t always wait for fashion.) Someone else is offering me fresh water at the low, low price of soda pop.

This energy was only made possible by the efforts of Pokemon and our state-of-the-art technology! Hm, I wonder how pokemon were involved? Just building, or are they part of the continued functioning?

Onward to next Flare grunt.

Are you trying to play us for a fool, kid? You don’t seriously think you can just barge in here and take us all by yourself, do you? Of course I do. But thank you for making it clear this isn’t just business as usual! Serena’s going to be a HERO.

And now one of the grunts has harnessed the greatest power ever possessed in the whole series: the power of an NPC standing in one place. I may have won, but refusing to move afterward accomplishes the same thing! You’re just lucky Serena’s nice, NPC.

Next one: I love the feel of accomplishment that comes with overcoming a challenge!

YES ME TOO LET’S FIGHT

Oh, and now my cute skiddo is evolving into the somewhat less cute gogoat.

It can tell how its Trainer is feeling by subtle shifts in the grip on its horns. This emphatic sense lets them run as if one being.

Well, time to update my team.

Litleo L28
Braixen L32
Wartortle L34
Tyrunt L29
Fletchingder L32
Amaura L27