Dragon Quill

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8887555/um.. yeah. stop nitpicking my fic please

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8893095/[so you shouldn’t capitalize words like pokemon or pikachu or charizard.]

Stopped reading here.

Could you write a proper review next time? Preferably when you’ve done some research?

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8892510/Hey, thanks for the advise and input on specific problems. You have no idea how much that helps, although I hardly understand a thing you just explained… I will be making appropriate changes soon. I guess I am trying too hard, but I suck with English grammar and writing in general. I grew up having to move a lot, change schools all of the time and speak/write in Spanish and English. So I posted this before I became completely discouraged and stopped, I just wanted to get the ball rolling.

How do you get a beta reader anyways?

And again, thank you very much for your input.

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8893236/Thank you for pointing out those grammatical errors to me.

Anyways, since this is the first chapter, I did leave some things in the dark (which would be explained later) so that’s the reason why Leaf’s thoughts and actions don’t really make sense. Maybe I might have been a bit too nondescript when it came to that, but I didn’t notice anything wrong with it (of course, this is from the author’s point of view, which isn’t the best, I’ll admit) before you pointed it out.

I’ll also admit that now, looking back, it was pretty stupid to have Leaf’s charmander act the way it did when she gave it a name. However, I didn’t want to drag it on with them trying to compromise and find the perfect name that both of them agreed on – that would have probably been pretty boring. Still, there’s plently of time for characters and personalities to be developed, given that this is only the first chapter. I’ll definitely keep this in mind while writing the second chapter.

As for your last thoughts about my “please review” statement, I’ll be honest (although it might not sound sincere, since you can only read words through a computer screen) but I was very hesitant to add that in there. I’m assuming you were implying something along the lines of how annoying or wrong it is to ask something like that, and I completely agree. I’ve already removed that, if it helps. I was just begging for attention, I know, and I (because honestly, I’m sort of mad at myself for writing that) won’t do that ever again. Just please don’t bring the topic up again, if you could.

Thank you for your criticism, because it really helped.

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8895726/I’m glad you liked it.

I really just intended N to not be able to do anything when Red captures Long-Sweet-Death; N and the lickitung clan are two stories up from where the fight takes place, more or less, so by the time N looked down, resolved to jump, did jump, and picked up his smarting muscles from the ground, Red would have left. I think also that N didn’t really think Red would try to capture Long-Sweet-Death until it actually happened. Red’s Pikachu is really, really strong, much stronger than the rest of the pokemon in the cave bar Mewtwo. He beat Long-Sweet-Death in two hits. What does Red even *need* in a pokemon that’s much weaker than the ones he already has? That one’s mostly because N doesn’t really think like a trainer.

I tried really hard to get Mewtwo right — the idea for the story came from the fact that N and Mewtwo have pretty similar pasts and wants (“a world without trainers”), so when N tells Mewtwo to go out and be a hero, he’s telling Mewtwo it can succeed where N himself failed, which I think N is pretty much the only human NPC we ever meet who could possibly say that to a pokemon.

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8893102/Wow, I didn’t think my story needed that much work, though I have some things to say in my defense.

Regarding the capitalization of certain words, I’ve almost always seen the names of Pokemon species capitalized. Evidence can be found on any Pokemon article in the Pokemon Wiki and also in countless stories on this site. Additionally, I’ve almost never seen the word “Pokemon” not capitalized. I personally think Pokemon is meant to be a proper noun. I have seen it capitalized too many times that it does not look right without the capitalization. so I hope you understand where I am coming from.

Regarding the slowness of my writing, I did not plan to make this a quick story. In fact, I despise quick relationships and prefer to develop them over a long period of time which is more realistic in some cases. It may or may not be for others, but it certainly has been for myself and others that I know.

Regarding beta readers, thanks for the advice. I’ll be sure to check it out.

Regarding the general mess of my grammar, thanks for pointing some of it out to me. I’m sure that there’s more in there somewhere, so I’m dreading the moment when I reread it.

Overall, thanks for the review! I really appreciate how you took the time to give constructive criticism. ^_^

I really appreciate reviews like yours because they’re straight to the point in addressing what’s wrong. You didn’t sugar coat anything, and I admire that. Reviews like these can help a person improve in their writing, and I believe that’s what you’re trying to do. Thank you again.

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8877847/thanks, and just in case for next chapter .what the heck is a beta reader

A response to your review at http://www.fanfiction.net/r/8892668/Thanks for reviewing. I’m glad you, of all people, reviewed it first, because I doubt I’m going to get another review as helpful as this one.

I think I fixed this up a bit, or at least I tried to. The major changes include: erasing all parts where Nat Turner comes up, and making OC seem like less of a flip-flopper, or whatever you want to call it.

I mainly mentioned Nat Turner in the story to somewhat foreshadow what is to come. And, regarding your copied statement of OC dodging responsibility, he said he didn’t actually “destroy the island”, but rather lead its destruction. Are you with me? Nonetheless, I deleted the part where OC says, “But I didn’t really do anything,” because, yes, he did do something, and you’re right.

As for your ending stating, “Holy shit I do not think you thought this through,” I don’t know what to make of it. It’s not exactly helpful, but I deleted that entire monologue anyway because there’s too much Turner mentioned. So, happy?

Thanks again!