The Current List of Suggested Books

I’m not interested in doing Gregor The Overlander (no more from her, thanks), Mortal Instruments (author’s a plagiarist), Ender’s Game (author’s crazy), Artemis Fowl (unremarkably terrible).

I’m skipping things that have already gotten this treatment. No Twilight or Fifty Shades, Inheritance Cycle, Harry PotterHush, Hush or House of Night (done twice!).

I liked Sabriel, Perdido Street Station, and The Golden Compass.

I’m probably not going to do And Then There Were None and The Girl Who Played With Fire (I don’t read mysteries), The Long Walk (generally find the author boring), Name of the Wind (long, boring).

Possible:

Eon: Rise of the Dragoneye

Never heard of it!

The Scorpio Races:

Apparently kids race on freaky water horses that hate them and some of them die, for some reason.

Delirium:

“apparently it’s set in a future where love had been declared to be a mental disorder (Keeping in mind that the year this takes place is around 2050-2075). So people get surgeries to keep them from feeling desire. Everyone gets it at 18, because that’s the age the surgery will work, for some reason.”

Fever:

Sequel to Wither. No more need be said, really.

Grave Mercy:

The main character is an assassin I think.

Crossed:

Sequel to Matched.

Starters:

“all the people aged 20-60 dying in a plague, and yet the surviving 60+ crowd keeps around laws that prevent teenagers from working”

Stargirl:

I remember it being sort of like a deconstruction of manic pixie dreamgirl, with a guy narrator I hated.

The Host:

By that Twilight person.

Left Hand of Darkness:

Old and famous novel by Ursula Le Guin. Considered feminist lit.

Gone:

“Every human 15 and older vanishes, and the town and surrounding areas (later named the FAYZ) are encased within an impenetrable bubble. Many of the people and wildlife develop supernatural powers. “

The Pledge:

“in a fantasy country, people are divided into different classes and you must stay within your own class. Cue special girl who can speak every class language.”

Troubled Waters

“Female protagonist, political plot (kings and brides), contains an alternate world with a lot of world building things”

Rebel Angels

Sequel to A Great and Terrible Beauty.

Sexteen/XVI:

I have heard nothing but terrible things about this.

Elantris:

The failures of this book tasted delicious.

Animorphs:

Because stuff actually happened in them.

Serpahina:

“Girl who’s half-dragon in a world where dragons can disguise themselves at humans and currently hold a treaty with humans.”

Mortal Engines:

“post-apocalyptic steampunk. Cities have become moving vehicles and must consume one another in order to maintain themselves in a world deprived of natural resources.”

Dresden Files:

I hated the first book and not enough people agree with me.

Hollow Kingdom:

Supernatural romance with goblins.

John Dies at the End:

Some sort of self-aware horror thing?

Beautiful Creatures:

It’s genderflipped Twilight or something.

Daughter of Smoke and Bone

“The main protagonist is a ginormous Sue (Her name is Karou, her blue hair grows out of her head that colour [Incidentally, the author has bright pink hair, which, I’m sure, isn’t natural], she is an artsy art student in Prague despite not being Czeck, she is omg!beautiful and omg!talented and everyone envies ehr artistic skills, she travels around the world on mysterious errands for teeth for her father figure Brimstone, a chimaera, because she is also an orphan…)”

Divergent:

Apparently there’s some terrible, terrible worldbuilding here.

Unstrung:

Bonus novella to Unwind.

Witchblade:

Is not exactly a book but it sure is a something.

Sever:

Sequel to Fever and end of the Chemical Garden trilogy at last.

Beloved of the Dead (Exalted):

This is more of an advance warning. I’m doing Exalted after every time you assholes make me do a book with rape, which at this point looks a lot like after every time I do a book.

Beautiful Darkness:

Sequel to Creatures and part of a four-book series, I guess the author couldn’t fit all the lack of worldbuilding into just one.

Eona:

Sequel, naturally, to Eon.

Reached:

Final Matched book, apparently sucks less than the others, but that’s not necessarily saying much.

UnWholly:

Fire:

Sort-of sequel to Graceling.

Insurgent:

Sequel to Divergent.

Children of the Dragon (Exalted):

Stop making me read rapefests or this is next.

New rule for suggesting: I don’t want to spend time on books people already know suck, so as a measurement let’s look to Goodreads and their four-star rating, which Unwind readily manages so we’re not exactly talking high standards here. You can recommend a book with a rating under that, but you have to make a case for why the book’s noteworthy in its failure.

And suggest anything other than books over here.

97 Comments

  1. Farla says:

    Eon, Eon!

    I’ll always enjoy all of the stuff you review. But I’m always holding out hope that you’ll open this can of worms. White people living in an Asian world, man.

    1. Farla says:

      Why are you me.

      Also, race stuff isn’t exactly my specialty of hate. I really only know the broad strokes, and I find it particularly difficult to follow in books compared to visual media.

    2. Fool says:

      …It would seem that Farla has a split personality.

  2. not says:

    Farla, Dresden Files: people kept saying the books got better, and the first were the weakest. They don’t, they all suck tremendously. It needs a sporking.
    ….
    I’ll be your best friend.

    1. Farla says:

      Sounds like you need to vote early and often on the next poll!

  3. not says:

    Also, Sexteen. Wtf?

    1. Ember says:

      Well, nonsensical dystopias and Puritan sexual mores both seem to be trendy in YA right now. When you think about it, that novel was kind of the inevitable result of the current climate.

      1. not says:

        Unwind is the proof of that. REMEBER, ABORTION IS (literal)MURDER!

        1. Farla says:

          Indeed, abortion is just an excuse to get your babymurder quota filled.

  4. Rachel says:

    Have you ever heard of David Wong? He writes for Cracked.com – America’s Only Humour Site with some of the least funny, yet somehow most popular articles. He wrote John Dies at the End http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Dies_at_the_End a while back, possibly while doing the same drug he describes in the book. It reminds me of an off-brand version of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, that keeps you asking WTF, but it’s gained a bit of a following. Also the film was terrible.

    1. Ember says:

      Some of their articles ARE funny though. And moderately informative, too! At least enough so to be EXCELLENT time-killers. Though, yeah, a lot of them are shit.

      1. Ember says:

        Oh wait maybe you were talking about Wong specifically and not the site in general. In that case I have no opinion since I’ve never bothered to keep track of the writers.

        1. Rachel says:

          Yeah, I was talking about Wong. To be fair, though, I was forgetting about John Cheese.

          That’s something else I should mention. The book’s main character is named Dave Wong and his best friend is John “Cheese”. Weird.

    2. actonthat says:

      I can’t stand Wong. He’s a self-absorbed hack. Also, he has a penchant for deleting comments that disagree with him, which is like Internet sin #1.

      1. Farla says:

        Also the weirdness of being a white guy using that as his pseudonym.

        1. actonthat says:

          Wat. The fuck? That is one of the weirdest things. The socio-psychological implications are endless.

  5. Lisa says:

    First, love-love-love your reviews! Right on, sister!

    You made me feel sane while reading your reviews of the Hunger Games. You pointed out just about everything I found wrong plus more with that book! Not to mention you’ve got me ‘LOLing’ at what you have to say. I also like the fact that you don’t over try to be funny, it just is!

    You got a real talent on you.

    Second, I can not wait for you to dig into The Host! Read that book some years ago and um, no.
    And now I see the Dresden files is on the list…It’s like Christmas!

    Thank you for this, and keep on truckin’!

    Oh, and what about ‘Beautiful Creatures’ being added to that list?: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beautiful_Creatures_(novel)

    1. Farla says:

      Thanks! Always glad to spread the hate.

      What’s the pitch for Beautiful Creatures? Is it just another Twilight thing?

      1. Lisa says:

        Googling it seems to make people only compare the Twilight movie and the Beautiful Creatures movie, but not the books.
        So sounds like the only thing they seem to have in common is being romance/teen/supernatural/YA (But that almost sums up most of the YA books…so er).

        The summary goes:

        “Lena Duchannes is unlike anyone the small Southern town of Gatlin has ever seen, and she’s struggling to conceal her power, and a curse that has haunted her family for generations. But even within the overgrown gardens, murky swamps and crumbling graveyards of the forgotten South, a secret cannot stay hidden forever.

        Ethan Wate, who has been counting the months until he can escape from Gatlin, is haunted by dreams of a beautiful girl he has never met. When Lena moves into the town’s oldest and most infamous plantation, Ethan is inexplicably drawn to her and determined to uncover the connection between them.
        In a town with no surprises, one secret could change everything.”

        Plus, it’s a broham as a protagonist, not a fem-lady. Now, I Amazoned the books awhile back and it doesn’t look like a love triangle is within any of the books (BUT I MAKE NO PROMISES!), so that was kinda different. Does it seem like a Twilight clone? Not really. Does it seem like YA cookie cutter? Very, very possible.

        I think just because it was all up in my eyes for the longest, and me not knowing what the heck it was, and because it’s so popular it’s worth analyzing. I think it’s important to point out to folk “Look, this is what our young teens are reading!”. I think you’re the perfect person in pointing out just how problematic this popular book is. Or if *gasp* it’s actually a decent YA book! (Doubt it, but still)

        1. Farla says:

          Hm. Well, I have been not suffering enough with romance plotlines recently…

  6. Chiro says:

    I’d be curious to see what your issues with Elantris were. I love Sanderson’s work, and although Elantris isn’t as well done as his later work, I still thought it was great. Especially the priest character.

    Animorphs reviews would also be interesting. I love those books to bits, even there is no denying they were very silly at times.

    1. Farla says:

      Elantris was one of those things that’s really frustrating because I liked a lot of the ideas and the execution of them was almost but not quite right. Like the priest character! He was awesome and badass and then he dies at the end for no reason because it makes everything neat and tidy.

  7. Guest says:

    Is Delirium about a community of Incubators?

    1. Farla says:

      …wow, that would be so perfect for them. It’s the screw-you cherry on top of the misery sunday. “Oh, we totally grow up with emotions. It’s just more fun to farm yours~!”

  8. Lulu says:

    I hope that Left Hand of Darkness doesn’t turn out to be another feminist-sham like Hunger Games…

    1. purplekitte says:

      It’s pretty good, but it suffers a lot of “for it’s time” problems. It was written in 60s by an author born in the 20s, so the main character in particular comes across as a weird mixture of taken-for-granted sexism and homophobia, and outdated “progressive” views. On the other hand, the main character gets condemned by the plot a lot for his various perception mistakes about the people around him.

    2. Ember says:

      It kind of rubs me the wrong way that it’s always recced when people ask for feminist literature despite the fact that it has *absolutely no women in it*. (To be fair, it has only one man, but he’s obnoxious and sexist enough for ten.) I get that its status as such is about the *ideas* in it rather than portrayal of characters, but like purplekitte said, they’re kind of outdated and no longer all that revolutionary. Personally, I’ll take a “low concept” book with lots female characters it treats well and fairly even if it’s not actively trying to be feminist over high concept literature that’s directly about gender and gender roles but can’t be bothered to include women or their points of view.

      1. Farla says:

        Eh, from what I’ve read it doesn’t even seem to have removed the men all that well. I haven’t seen anything really establishing the group as genderless rather than guys who occasionally get pregnant. It seems a meditation on a single gender world of guys, as viewed by a regular guy. I’ve read other scifi with invented pronouns, this is exactly where they should have been showing up!

        1. Ember says:

          But Farla, don’t you know that so-called “masculine” pronouns are actually gender-neutral? That’s why people say things like “Was it the brother or the sister who lost his slipper?” all the time and no one would ever be confused by such a sentence!

        2. purplekitte says:

          I know LeGuin too has said that about it since, that she wishes she’d included more of people doing “traditionally feminine things” because they still need to get done and that she hadn’t defaulted to male pronouns.

  9. Socordya says:

    why not try the sword of truth?
    i heard it goes from bad to horrible
    the dresden files also sounds like a good idea. I read the first few chapters and it was kind of meh, but I’m sure you could really destroy it

    1. Farla says:

      Whoever told you that lied. It starts off horrible, sprints downhill from there over the course of a chapter or two, and to my understanding eventually gets so terrible it’s blackly entertaining, but I never managed to get that far myself.

  10. actonthat says:

    Thought today that it could be interesting (in the positive, “break for you” kind of way) to do Holes, a book I have utterly fond memories of.

    1. Ember says:

      <3333333! Oh, man, that was a really good one! Not many women in it, but Kate Barlow is a great enough character for ten. Lady bandit who takes revenge against society for being terrible and oppressive, and the narrative is VERY sympathetic to her while still gently acknowledging that some of the things she did were really not okay.

    2. Negrek says:

      I *love* holes! And also the Wayside School series that Sachar wrote–it’s been ages since I read it, but I remember that it was delightfully surreal (but also I think aimed at somewhat younger children than Holes).

  11. Saku says:

    If I may suggest yet anoher next book (A next next book, so to speak), I’d love you take a look at and, if interested, beautifully rip apart Laini Taylor’s Daughter of Smoke and Bone. The main protagonist is a ginormous Sue (Her name is Karou, her blue hair grows out of her head that colour [Incidentally, the author has bright pink hair, which, I’m sure, isn’t natural], she is an artsy art student in Prague despite not being Czeck, she is omg!beautiful and omg!talented and everyone envies ehr artistic skills, she travels around the world on mysterious errands for teeth for her father figure Brimstone, a chimaera, because she is also an orphan…), it is completely self-absorbed with its own cutesy quirkiness, and everything interesting about the book (The first third or so isn’t actually that bad – not a masterpiece, but not astoundingly bad neither) is shoved aside in favour of oh-so-romantic angel boyfriend action and more descriptions of how awesome Karou is when she forgets everything about herself that made her stand out from the other Paranormal YA heroines and instead picks up some new superpowers and wangsts nonstop and effectively turns into vampire!Bella Swan.

  12. Anon says:

    Maze Runner by James Daschner

    1. Farla says:

      You have to say why, Anon!

  13. TT says:

    Is Divergence the YA dystopia Divergent? I read it and didn’t think it was boring at all, it’s fast-paced and gets weird early. It’s worse than Hunger Games but does appear to be popular, judging by fanfiction.net numbers and the fact that the movie is already casting, and I haven’t seen anything negative about it yet. I think you’d have fun with it.

    1. Anon says:

      I think the problem with reviewing Divergent is it suffers from a lot of the same stuff the first Hunger Games book does; i.e. terrible/moronic world building and dumb high school crap. A lot of the book deals with the latter and it’s boring but the former could be interesting to talk about however it’s really obvious (some people I know who had no trouble with Hunger Games notice how stupid Divergent is). There’s also heavy anti-intellegent/anti-academic stuff in there that’s rage inducing but it’s still stupid and only really gets going towards the last ten chapters. One positive though is while it’s written worse then Hunger Games (I found it hard to get through; it really is quite dull) at least it tries to have female characters (outside our main character) matter. Like her mother is more active and is very important to her, the main character has a girl as a best friend whom she actually has conversations with (and isn’t fridged), there are a good number of women in charge (though one is super evil, ugh). Not super feminist mind you but better than Hunger Games; the first one anyway.

      1. Farla says:

        Hm. Actually I am all for delicious terrible worldbuilding. That’s one of the many, many issues with Unwind, there isn’t enough there to play with so all I can see is the shitty propaganda.

        1. Anon says:

          Well in that case you might consider Divergent. Most of the really dull parts are in the middle section where it gets the dumb high school/boot camp crap but I think you can find enough stupid in Divergent to keep yourself entertained or at least enough to talk about.

        2. Molly says:

          Divergent might be right up your alley then. The world building, different jobs, and how the government/population is separated and set up makes no god damn sense at all. It’s like the author has never met a group of humans before in her life.

          Also, if you like just plan bad, slut shaming, sexist unbelievable bullshit Halo would be a good book to look into. It’s so fucking horrible, and it clearly knows nothing about Angel mythology or anything like that. It’s the first book I ever actually considered destroying. Just as an example of how horrible it is, the whole story is kicked off because God decided that an upper middle class white suburb in America needed angels to help it more than all those places with famine, rampant disease, genocide, persecution, failed governments, civil wars, systematic legal rape, slavery, sweatshops, and those other icky problems that raise complicated painful questions about suffering and exploitation.

          1. Farla says:

            But the other places are too icky for angels!!!

            That sounds awesome.

  14. Socordya says:

    I heard of an upcoming book called “queen of the tearling” advertised by the publisher as “a female game of thrones” whatever that means.And a movie would be planned despite it not beeing published yet.Since it’s supposed to be in a medievalized future post environmental calamity,you would have plenty of world building to play with.
    All this I heard from antishurtugal.

    1. Ember says:

      Oh, that can’t possibly be good.

      1. Socordya says:

        Right? I mean “a female game of thrones”? at least they didn’t sell Eragon as “a fantasy star wars”.

        1. Ember says:

          Especially since, to my knowledge (I don’t actually read or watch the series), two of the most major players and many of the minor ones in the eponymous game are already female, so I’m worried that anyone who thinks GoT isn’t female-oriented enough holds that opinion because they don’t think girls are into plots that focus on war and intrigue. If they meant they were writing about a matriarchal version of Westeros I would be totally up for that, but sadly I suspect it actually means “let’s ignore all of the political stuff to focus on the fucked up romance, and also pretend that it isn’t actually fucked up.”

          1. Farla says:

            I have a suspicion it’ll be the story of “a female” competing to get her throne with her friends and enemies being male even though the whole point of the game of thrones is that playing it in the first place makes you a horrible person and gets everyone killed.

            Meanwhile ASoIaF already has a destined endgame queen and also she’s the mother of actual fucking dragons.

            1. Socordya says:

              “Meanwhile ASoIaF already has a destined endgame queen and also she’s the mother of actual fucking dragons.”

              I think the problem is many people don’t get that Dany is the heroine and still think it’s the Starks or something. Generally they are the same people who complain that “the author killed all the likable characters” (by which they mean Ned).

              Anyway for “Queen of the Tearling” I think it’s out of the question since it gets only 3,6 stars and some awful reviews on Goodreads (despite not being published yet?).

              Reply
  15. Jett says:

    As a heads up, there are already sporkings for House of Night and Divergent. So, as with Hush, Hush, doing ‘Let’s Read’s may prove repetitive.
    http://vivisector.wordpress.com/house-of-night/marked-recaps/ – This blog has the first three or four books of the House of Night series done.
    http://readingwithavengeance.tumblr.com/tagged/divergent/chrono -This blog has a read-through of Divergent, along with the first book of House of Night.

    1. Farla says:

      Those are some cranky sporks. Still, two people doing House of Night is definitely enough to get that off my plate. I’ll see where things go with Divergent.

      1. actonthat says:

        This may be just me, but I think there should be a quality threshhold for other sporks before taking something off the list. Haven’t looked at the links, but… yeah.

        1. Farla says:

          They’re not bad, just…cranky. I’m sure Divergent’s worldbuilding will be a disaster, but give it rope to hang itself with first, don’t start off hating it before anything happens! And House of Night is generally hilaribad, you’ve got to just accept that.

  16. Azrel says:

    There’s always Christine Feehan’s Dark/Carpathian series, where most of the heroines are too stupid to live and the heroes need to quit with the abuse and yet it’s remained popular-as in people love it, not love to hate it. Er, something like that.

    For YA stuff, there’s always Amanda Hocking’s Trylle trilogy… I remember it being kinda like the Hunger Games, with the poor world building and such. Or Alyson Noel’s Evermore… with so many wallbangery moments courtesy of both Ever and Damon.

    Heh, if you do the first House of Night book you’ll be a better person than I. I tried to do a recap of that and quit after the first few chapters; the slut shaming and holier than thou and all the other things that drove me crazy about that book. ><

    1. Farla says:

      I think other people have been doing the House of Night, so hopefully I can just edge away from that one before anyone realizes.

  17. tomato says:

    I’d be really interested to see what you make of Rainbow Rowell’s Eleanor and Park (read: see if the flaws I sensed can be picked out and stated…or if I’m just weird). If it’s added to the poll I’ll vote very enthusiastically.

    1. Farla says:

      What was interesting about it?

  18. Zolnier says:

    Ever considered doing the Tyra Banks fantasy book? Or would that be an overly easy target? Also ever heard of Ingo? Book series about mermaids. I do have a soft spot for it but I can see why it’d annoy people.

    Not enough good fantasy books about mer people.

    1. Farla says:

      I’ve seen a spork of the Modelland thing and it just seemed straight insanity – I can’t even think of what to comment on, no one seemed to have any idea what was even happening. And no, haven’t heard of Ingo.

      1. Zolnier says:

        Ingo is a mixed bag I will admit. On the one hand uber-important dad syndrome even though he didn’t die but instead went of to fuck a mermaid. On the other hand the mother is present and isn’t like some empty shell of a person. On the one hand nice world building and a not uninteresting take of merpeople myths. On the other hand endless humans are terrible bits. We are especially in regards to marine environments but it gets tiring.

        I also like that the sea gets some magical representation but so does land. Land’s personification kind of reminds me of Granny Weatherwax actually.

  19. ludeshka says:

    I’d like to reccomend a book I find very irritating.

    It’s “Limbo” , by Bernard Wolfe. (Info about it here: http://thefinchandpea.com/2012/03/16/apocalypse-1952-bernard-wolfes-limbo/ )

    It’s got everything! It’s racist, mysoginist, has a white savior protagonist, the communists are super evil villains, but the capitalists also suck. Basically, only the main character is ever right about everything, and he’s going to tell you exactly why. In detail.
    Oh, and it thinks sometimes women kind of want to be raped.

    …yes, yes, it was written in 1952, but I’m not really on the “It was good for its time!” school of thought.

    I think if you were to read it, you’d find even more things wrong with it than I did. :D

  20. Zolnier says:

    Ever consider doing something with some Greek Myth stuff?

  21. illhousen says:

    How about Midnighters (atarting with The Secret Hour) by Scott Westerfeld? From what I remember, it’s not too terrible, but have some serious problems with worldbuilding.

  22. Victoria says:

    The Mortal Engines is by the same plagiarist author as The Mortal Instruments, so if you don’t want to do one, you may not want to do the other.

    1. actonthat says:

      Hm? No, Mortal Engines is by someone named Phillip Reeve, while Mortal Instruments is by the infamous Cassandra Clare.

      1. Farla says:

        Also, it contained original thoughts.

  23. Zolnier says:

    You know that Billy and Howard thing I suggested yonks ago? I started a let’s read for it!

    1. Farla says:

      Excellent! Where are you posting?

      1. Zolnier says:

        Something Awful, will probably post on my blog as well. Here’s a link.

        http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3601355&pagenumber=1#lastpost

        Tell me what you think if you can. If you choose to read along be warned, it has Crossed calibre gore and bad morality.

        1. Farla says:

          Good god, that is the stuiest stu power fantasy I’ve ever seen. I saw something where the guy had similar mindrape powers but it didn’t have the glee about what the mindrape powers felt like to everyone else.

          1. Zolnier says:

            And it gets worse, so much worse. I should be posting another chapter later today. Your input would be very welcome.

            Also when you’re future world controller is immortal, why rush him into power when he’s ten?

            1. Farla says:

              My brain already crawled out my ear to escape the madness. I don’t know, pepper things with funny cat macros? Do the writeups drunk? Whatever will dull the pain.

              Reply
              1. Zolnier says:

                That’d be like painting a train wreck happy colours.

                Also Sarah likes Howard way too much.

              2. Zolnier says:

                Posted again, I have to say Howard’s parts are more readable but bitching about Billy is so much more fun.

              3. Zolnier says:

                Hey out of cruisity which narrator were you referring to?

  24. M says:

    I want to “recommend” a book I’ve bought myself last year and I’m still unsure if it is wonderfully terrible or terribly wonderful: The Prophecy of the Stones. It was written by a sixteen years old teenager and got way more praise than it deserves. It’s about three girls (Or four, but the last is introduced relatively late, so I won’t talk about her) named Opal, Amber and Jade. They are destined to join with the Chosen One (Actual title) to form the Army of Light (Actual name) and defeat the Army of Darkness (Act- Well, you get the idea) Also, it’s all a metaphorical dream of a girl in a hospital (Named or nicknamed Joa. As in, J(ade)o(pal)a(mber)), and every so often we cut to her and hear her angst.Or maybe she’s “just” having visions from a very convenient alternative universe. It’s not a spoiler, by the way, it’s in the back of the book.
    The only sporking I found of it was incomplete, which is a shame because the terribleness doesn’t stop until literally the last chapter. It’s terriderful.

    1. Wriggle says:

      Oh man, I remember The Prophecy of the Stones. Even as a twelve-year-old I thought it was ridiculous. I only just re-read the first hundred-something pages a few months ago and laughed my ass off.

      1. M says:

        I read it when I was twelve too (Or maybe thirteen, can’t remember exactly) I was lured by the mention of a “Death strike” in the back, which sounded very interesting but turned out to just be a device to create DRAMA and give us a nice death scene excepts no, we can totally save her because death is in strike! I also liked the bird monters that ate fear, they were pretty cool and one of the two (three if you only count concepts and not the way it was done) I liked of the book. Jade’s introduction chapter was deceptively good too, it was probably why she was the only girl I kinda cared about.

    2. Wriggle says:

      Also, a slight correction: the author was actually thirteen years old back when she wrote it. It makes the story’s lack of quality somewhat more understandable (but not the fact it was published in the first place.)

    3. Farla says:

      Hm. It looks like even Goodreads has standards there and it’s below four stars. How far did the other sporking get?

      1. M says:

        Oh, sorry, I forgot about the stars. I still would love if you could review it, but I would totally understand if you reject it in those grounds.

        It got to chapter 11, which is just as they reach the magical land that they started traveling to when they turned 16 years old, so basically when the plot starts.

        1. M says:

          Ah, wait, I reread the spork (I don’t have the book at hand) and it is actually a bit later than that. Still rather early in, though.

        2. Farla says:

          Wow, sounds long. I guess I can check it out, though – it might be entertaining.

          1. M says:

            As I said, I lost the book, but comparing it to one I have at hand and is about as thick, it probably has like 400-500 pages.

            I’m actually thinking about buying it again if I can’t find it in my house, some parts are exactly the level of terrible necessary to be almost parodic but not so much that they’re infuriating.

            1. Wriggle says:

              400-500 pages sounds about right from what I remember. It’s an easy read, but there’s something to complain about on basically every page.

              Reply
  25. Rufus says:

    I’d enjoy seeing you do The Culling by Steven De Santos, it has a 4 star rating on goodreads as well. I’m admittedly bitter about it, it’s a teen book about a gay boy that ISNT all about his sexuality. My hopes were promptly dashed when I realized the main character is a Sparkley Sue with no real personality except Upstanding Moral Citizen, all the females were horrible, the love triangle made no sense and I STILL have no idea how big the world is because they apparently have the people to just throw them away willy nilly by the hundreds yet all the citizens fit into one stadium.It’s actually quite rage inducing.

    1. Farla says:

      A nonsensical dystopia where gay people do exist? That might be worth doing for the novelty.

  26. Glorkvorn says:

    I’d like to recommend the “Wool” series for a sporking. It started off with short stories that the author self-published on Amazon, then suddenly got really popular and turned into regular sized books. I thought the original series of short stories was really good- It’s got a strong female character, a well crafted and not overly bleak dystopian world, and the plot moves along at a good pace.

    But then after that I think it completely goes off the rails- it seems like the author painted himself into a corner, plotwise, and just couldn’t get himself out of it, so instead it introduces a lot of really bad side characters and goes nowhere. Judging by it’s rating on Goodreads, though, most people don’t agree with me.

    1. Farla says:

      Hm, that sounds like it’d be interesting. And short stories hold the promise of actual plots.

  27. Nowhere says:

    What about Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas? Sociopathic super assassin mary-sue main character, a nonsensical plot which is ignored half the time in favour of relationship drama, massive failures in research and basic logic. Inexplicably considered to be good by most people I’ve talked to.

  28. Ike says:

    Hey, I know you have other things on your plate, but you should totally consider doing a read-through of Worm.(parahumans.wordpress.com) Superpowers, worldbuilding, strong female protagonist. Large enough that it has a large fanbase, but small enough that the author might read your reviews and make changes before he/she publishes it.

  29. Reyna says:

    Legend by Marie Lu

    This one isn’t terrible. In fact, it’s very reminiscent of Divergent, and it’s another one of those dystopia YA novels that the Hunger Games helped make popular.

    Summary: In a society where you take a test at the age of ten that determines your intelligence (or something), a girl’s cop (or military-can’t really remember which) gets killed by a teen fugitive. Said girl, who’s some kind of prodigy (though it’s never really made clear), has to hunt down the teen fugitive rebel guy. And, yes, they fall in love.

    The book isn’t bad, but gosh, were there some squick moments. Like, the cop brother’s best friend seems REALLY interested in the main girl. He’s in his mid to late twenties and she’s about 15-16. And, the romance felt very sudden and squicky. A pair of fifteen year olds making out intensely is something that I find squicky. Very squicky.

    But, uh, yeah. Not sure if this one works for the blog, but this book definitely had a strong-female-protagonist vibe to it.

    1. Socordya says:

      Shatter Me (http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/10429045-shatter-me)
      I suggest this mostly because I saw this post: http://justpassingthroughreality.tumblr.com/post/60612183692/ive-finally-hit-that-point-where-i-need-to-follow) and thought you could make it a bingo.
      It’s dystopia because of course it is.
      Warning, romance ahead.
      Edit: oops I didn’t mean to put that as a reply to Renya’s comment.

  30. infinitestrike says:

    Not sure if you already know this Farla, but Clariel: The Lost Abhorsen has just been released!

    1. Farla says:

      :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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