Ides of March!

Alright, it’s the Promised Time.

I think this is actually spread across more tumblrs but fuck if I’m doing that much legwork. I should’ve been keeping up but I didn’t and now the posts about who the fuck this newbie is who doesn’t know it’s supposed to be capitalized are lost to time. We’ll just be focusing on the main saga.

A third of the way into the month, they announce that I do reviews this month.

Note that this is very horrible but there’s no mention of how people can avoid the reviews. I actually can’t tell if this is because this is all posturing or if it’s because they may have missed that while missing the directions for how to get a review and the part where it starts on the first of January, and also the actually helpful person who promptly reblogged and said as much:


Honestly, that is the great mystery. Throughout this, I couldn’t tell if the main players are pretending to be stupid for a purpose or if they’re really this dumb. My best guess is it’s some sort of mix. People who are better at tumblr may be able to make sense of this.

They also pull out the tag farla quest which will go on to detail their continued failure to figure out how the January reviewing that, as they say, I do every year, actually works. Within a few days they’ll forget they have the tag but keep posting updates untagged.


And, of course, immediately after posting the attention pours in:



If you’re wondering at the bit about posting “regardless of if it’s correct”, the answer is going to be so, so much more depressing than you expect. Think of the semicolon bit as foreshadowing.

Can it get worse from here? Yep.

Now, this is where we get begin the main part where I can’t tell where the lies and stupidity intersect. They start off with saying I just spam the dialogue paragraph – nothing about what I’m saying is wrong, just that I always say it even when the other person is doing fine.

The general chatter keeps going so let’s just focus on the bits relevant to our tale from here on out.



And thus I get that first PM.

The PM chains will eventually end in Feb with me saying as clearly as I can that “I can treat you however I want because my friends and I agree you’re not people btw we’re the good guys you monster!” is fucked up. I get a private apology that will probably be out of their mind the next time they want Sempai to notice them, assuming they meant it at all and didn’t feel that apologies are just said whenever the other person is complaining about something.

In fairness to Tumblr, this is basically no different from Livejournal, it’s just the people there were largely able to grasp that posting in public meant people could see it.

Note also the assumption I’m acting in bad faith and this is just an excuse because I don’t want to read it, not because of the reasons I actually gave. A lot of what goes on here makes a great deal of sense looked at through the lens of no one actually meaning what they’re saying and figuring I must be doing the same thing. This may also be why the attempts at lying and manipulating are fine – look at how I just lied and manipulated back with my excuse there, right?

Anyway, my response is:

Jan 14It’s nice of you to want me to see something good for once, but again, this is the time I review fanfic posted in this month and I’m kind of busy with that.However, if your goal is just to make me look at the story and see how much better it is than mine, then that would at least bypass the issue of not wanting people to request reviews for someone else. As you may have noticed, I have a forum that contains directions on how to get me to look at a story. I assume you don’t want to read and review a story of mine, but if you give a baker’s dozen reviews to other people, I’ll look at what you want. If you give it to people posting new stories right now, I’ll even waive the usual thing about how this’ll have to wait until the end of the month and look at it as soon as you’re done.

Jan 16You’re referring to the review exchange forum?
Jan 16To the system I posted six years ago on my forum and have been using this entire time for all requests, yes. While it normally doesn’t come up, I’d add that if you want me to stare at any other stuff of your choosing, each baker’s dozen of reviews will again obligate me to do so.

Which is why the saga doesn’t continue on their tumblr – we have to keep pretending it’s this incredible mystery how to get a review from me, so it cuts off right here.


Please review a story?
Jan 14Hi Farla! I love your work! Will you please review I am Lu’s ‘The Ash Connection’? I know its long, but seeing as its Pokémon month for you, I wanted to see what you thought about it.

Jan 14Hey there totally coincidental person! I’m gonna have to reiterate what I already said and add that if the author wants a review they really need to just ask directly. It’s not like it’s hard to figure out how this works.See, as has just been repeatedly illustrated, people regularly approach me in bad faith.

You probably think it’s harmless because it hasn’t occurred to you that people will do this because they’re mad at an author and they’re just as willing to lie about that to me or otherwise try to manipulate me into doing what they want. Like, well, all of this, I’ve established the policy for a reason. It has nothing to do with how you word it. If someone leaves reviews as I ask on my forum and then tells me to review a story of theirs, I will be obligated to do so regardless of how rudely they choose to do so. If you leave the reviews as I ask on my forum and then have the author contact me to confirm they’re okay with those being payment for a review on their story, I’d be obligated to do so. That obligation would take place after this month is over, just like it always does. In this case, it would also take place after I review the two other people I’ve promised reviews.

Since this is even clearer, it also doesn’t appear on Tumblr.

This is why, sadly, I have to go with “deliberately lying” over “can’t understand written directions”. I don’t know how much is lying, but the fact the actual directions aren’t getting posted while the other stuff is means people are able to identify when that’s happening and avoid it.

And here we see how it does matter what’s true and false.

If this is just them, then pretending they want one when they’re not sure they do vs actually being unable to figure out how to get one or understand anything else about how I do things is just a matter of curiosity.

But if they do know, then they knew they could’ve told this person that you can just block me but decided it was better for the attention they got to keep pretending ignorance about that, while pretending to really care about how sad it was they wouldn’t be posting this month and how horrible it is I’m doing this.

And this takes place on the sixteenth. Two days have gone by since I told either two separate people or one person who loves telling them about PMing me that there’s rules for getting reviews, and I then reiterate that yes, the review forum on this very day – the review forum our I DON’T KNOW HOW TO GET A REVIEW FROM FARLA SUCH A MYSTERY author here referenced in one of their very first posts summing me up and indicating they’d read. Four days have gone by since the original reblog saying people should just block me. Either they missed all of this, or they decided to lie.

They will continue to do there “STILL NO REVIEW FROM FARLA” thing after this.

Which brings us to our next bit:

Previously it was that I was saying it to people who were doing it right, but now, perhaps because they’ve actually taken the time to read the paragraph or because they were just building up their confidence, they’re saying that no, I’m actually wrong about what I’m saying.


Because they were already writing their dialogue like this. If my way is right, they’d have to admit they were doing something wrong.

So obviously, there’s no rule about not grimacing out your dialogue and it’s just my style!!!!!!!

If you’re wondering how this goes with them being an English teacher, English education focuses on interpreting set canons and writing essays, and much of the fictional canon is ancient and uses archaic grammar rules. There is, sadly, absolutely nothing surprising that someone with an English background wouldn’t have ever learned dialogue rules. It certainly wasn’t covered in any of the classes I took, even the college Creative Writing course. I suspect you have to get somewhat deep into the CW major before the teacher bothers telling you how dialogue is written. Or maybe they’ve given up entirely and that’s been offloaded to editors only – Act, any thoughts?

(I don’t know how they missed that there’s rules for numbers, though – I guess they weren’t writing any essays that included those.)

Talking to someone else, I said:

Yes, writers will use incorrect grammar sometimes to portray something unusual, where their break from established grammar serves a purpose. As you say, a tense situation and incomplete thoughts can be expressed by sentence fragments. Capitalizing words that shouldn’t otherwise be capitalized expresses…?

Over in Homestuck, we’d capitalize game items as games do when talking, because the Queen’s Ring shouldn’t be confused with a ring a queen wears when one is a planet-destroying weapon. There’s a good case to be made about capitalizing attack names, so that glaring and Glaring are distinct. Stories have been written without punctuation or with misspellings to convey a better sense of a young or uneducated narrator. A style must serve a purpose – it can’t both not matter how it’s done and be a stylistic choice.

And I think a very good measurement of “is this a style?” is if the person is defending it by saying what they’re accomplishing by doing it this way or if they’re saying in the same breath that omg it doesn’t even matter ok let me do what i want. Here we see clear explanations for the stuff they’re not doing in the fic, followed by a handwave about the actual point in contention.

Here they have finally figured it out – when it unclear, though it’s quite possible it was January 14th or even from the very start, with the month just being a long it of psyching themself up for it.
For whatever reason, they’re also still not acknowledging the review option, which I think gives weight to my hypothesis that they’re putting this off. It may also be that they’re just self-aware enough to view the first chapter of something they’ve been working on for a while at risk of me tearing into it, but honestly do think whatever new thing they’re working on will wow me. It may also be that they really weren’t told that by anyone and really did miss it while doing just enough investigation to work out that I only review new stories.
They eventually manage to get it out on the 30th. As luck would have it, that’s when I’m running behind. See, despite all this drama, I really don’t pay attention to names unless I absolutely have to, so despite being told their penname in the earlier PMs, I wouldn’t have noticed.
Luckily the descent into madness is coming, which will tangentially involve being PMed yet again.
Of course, later they’ll insist that a copypaste review was completely what they wanted, so I guess this was mutual sarcasm? And also their obvious anxiety while waiting for the review was sarcasm too.

I’m not sure why anyone would think that a fic about a bunch of canon characters but “Slight AU that omits N arc” would really show me, although they really do seem to not get that people could be into Pokemon because of the pokemon and not to care about which girl Ash kisses.

In a way that doesn’t involve actually putting anything on their fic, naturally.
You can see why I really have to go with the idea they’re not the most truthful person, and also perhaps aren’t quite sure how much they want this review.
This is still the 30th – they could’ve (and, perhaps, did and just pretended otherwise) looked at the category to see how far back I was.


Anyway, by amazing coincidence, right after a person suggests my mean review will turn all of fandom against me, and presumably totally aware that sadly that wouldn’t happen just because I tell them their story sucks, they post this:

Yes, they definitely care about trans people and the timing was such a coincidence. They will go on to definitely care about them more in a later post complete with an ass-covering tag about how they’re cis sorry in advance for fucking anything up here, right after they freak out and attempt to start predicting what I say, because obviously if you say it first that makes it not true, right?

Again I’m left confused as to if the answer if lying, stupidity, or assuming I’m lying.

A Review You Didn’t Write

Jan 31Hello there. I have a friend who wrote a Pokemon story and published it yesterday, January 30th, yet it did not receive a review from you. I’m just wondering why you skipped that story. She worked very hard to write it because she’s better than you and wanted to show you what she could do. You review so many Pokemon stories yet have never reviewed hers, and this time she even published one in January, and you still ignored it. Is it because you think she’s so out of your league? Or did you simply pass over it?The story is titled “The Middleground” by I Am Lu, for your information.

Jan 31She didn’t want to send a message yet, but I did, because her writing is something you’d marvel at. Something that I think you should try to pick at and critique. Something that’s actually a decent story that was written in January just so that you’d possibly see it. Her writing is unbelievably amazing, and you have either been avoiding it, or haven’t had the luck to see it in all these years.Her fanfiction is always well-written, and I think it’s something you should definitely review and critique, because I want you to actually read something good. Something I bet there’s no way you can possibly find anything wrong with, it’s that amazing.

Jan 31Oh man, thanks for telling me/thanks for not noticing that the stories above and below that one don’t have reviews either yet. I don’t really pay attention to pennames so I wouldn’t have it noticed it was that author people were bugging me to read to see some better writing.[Something that’s actually a decent story that was written in January just so that you’d possibly see it. ]

There have been actually decent stories written this January already (some for the same reason even), though! My C2 lists the decent and up and my favorites list the good and up. Really recommend checking them out.

Anyway, they respond to this with delight because they wanted this, right?



Haha, assuming I’m going to read closely. Let this be a lesson to everyone: write cookiecutter OT fic if you want me to actually engage with your story, not something about a canon character talking to another canon character labeled romance.
We’re then blessed with a bit more of their thoughts on prescriptivism.
And I think it fits well with the idea everyone involved keeps assuming I say things I don’t mean, doesn’t it? “Prescriptivists” are saying stuff is wrong just because it’s in some book somewhere, even though it totally works better this way! They can’t possibly mean that it bothered them when reading it and that it’d work better the other way, even if they say exactly that, because everyone is a liar so hey, why shouldn’t you do the same, right?
They then make another attempt to get that transphobic dogpile going:
Yes let’s all avoid transphobia by insisting sexless creatures have genderless pronouns, because there is nothing more trans-friendly than the absolute fact that pronouns must match genitalia.
Also you can see more of the fact it’s just considered normal to pretend to care about things you actually don’t give a shit about and this is just speculation about which fake excuse and where.
This one fizzles and may mark the end of their sincere and not at all self-interested concern for warning everyone that I’m terrible – at least, they appear to drop the subject after this, coincidentally right as they finally get that review and get to work insisting they won and this is exactly what they wanted and let’s drop it now okay, but their tumblr’s mostly just pictures of pokemon characters so I’m not interested enough to search through to confirm.
As we’ve seen, definitely just wanted a regular review! And here we are over a month later finally getting to that full story.
Conversely, of course, telling them to go review others was definitely a special hurdle I thought up based on how very, very popular they are.

And by over, we mean continuing to post about it for a bit.

This very rude claim of a mutual kismesissitude is Feb 5th and sixty pages back for anyone interested. There’s likely at least one or two nuggets further up but I doubt there’s anything that’ll beat this as a perfect capstone, so we’re done! Maybe we’ll see them again in another six years or so. Hopefully by then they’ll manage respect that I’m quite fulfilled with my current black quadrant situation, stop ignoring nontraditional relationships you bigot!!1!

Next up: those reviews I actually owe I’m so sorry Negrek.


  1. Golgi says:
    I believe you about the dialogue punctuation reviews. I’ve seen a bit of unedited Internet fiction writing and getting that wrong seems to be an extremely common error.
    1. Farla says:
      It’s the error that keeps giving! Because people look at other fanfics to figure it out.


  2. Keleri says:
    *_* GLORIOUS.

    Hopefully by then they’ll manage respect that I’m quite fulfilled with
    my current black quadrant situation, stop ignoring nontraditional
    relationships you bigot!!1!

    lol, best.

  3. actonthat says:
    Wow this is actually creepily obsessive.

    I’m stuck somewhere between awe and disgust that she’s managed to tumblrize grammar into ~prescriptivists~, those terrible awful people, and ~the good ones~ who presumably don’t get a name.

    This is clearly someone of the “I don’t understand the rules so I’ll assume no one does and go from there” variety, a particularly irritating sort.

    Or maybe they’ve given up entirely and that’s been offloaded to editors only – Act, any thoughts?

    It depends on the education level. In primary school, yes, they no longer care. Teachers are literally taught to give no fucks about grammar.

    In secondary school, if you don’t make it into an AP or other similarly high-level course, lolnope. Sorry poor people who can’t shell of $100 per AP test, you don’t get to learn words.

    College, as in so many other ways, is what you make of it. It’s entirely possible to take an English course of study without ever actually learning about the language, especially with things like RateMyProfessor that let you choose how much actual work you want to do. There are idiots everywhere, and academia is no exception. But there are also a lot of good professors, and it’s entirely possible to choose a reasonable, linguistic approach to the major — hell knows I did it. (My general advice to people pursuing an English degree is: find out which professor makes you read the most, and take that class. English professors with 3 or 4 stars are going to be the best ones, not the 4s or 5s, because good ones will make people angry by making them work for their grades.)

    The biggest problem is that once you’re at the post-secondary level, no matter what classes you’re in, the assumption you can string a sentence together is made. I was forced into a 101 course at NYU before I left that hellhole, and it wasn’t an actual writing class, it was composition and the five-paragraph essay. So you jump right over basic linguistics and grammar and into more advanced study, and if you’re someone who doesn’t handle criticism very well, you can from there easily find professors that don’t really care about you or their jobs, and coast through on your own righteousness. You keep getting Bs because anyone who isn’t completely incoherent will get Bs, so you become completely sure what you’re doing is fine, because the American educational system has failed you at every conceivable level.

    I hemmed and hawed about my choice a lot when I dropped out of the teaching program. It was a thing where what I thought was right — attempting to help kids and change this system — took a back seat to my mental health. I just, emotionally, couldn’t do it. But it still bothers me, and I still hate myself a little for throwing in the towel. It kills me that so, so many kids are losing something so important because of people like OP here who believe “English is a playground.” Ugh.

    I always wonder — do they also think Chinese and Spanish are playgrounds? Or is it just a mix of ignorance, self-importance, and subtle racism that lead them to bastardize their own language as if it’s some special animal Unlike Those Other Languages?

    1. SpoonyViking says:
      Geez, and here I thought your educational system had it better than ours. Sounds like they’re pretty much in the same state.
      1. actonthat says:
        I’ve always wondered, actually — does Portuguese get this same treatment in Brazilian schools, or is it reserved for English?
        1. Emmannuel Alexandre says:
          Well, the notion that “Portuguese is a playground” is not directly taught, but it ends up becoming something that is socially built. The educational problems here stem from the fact that school itself, specially public school, is there mainly to “pretend” it’s performing its activities, as a form of facade to disguise the incompentence of the government as whole. Being so, all subjects worked within school suffer due to uncompromised teachers, buildings with poor resources and also an ideology which has been gaining strength lately that spreads the impression of “That’s the way things are, and that’s it.”The population as a whole does not have so much will to fight against these deficiencies anymore. As a result, Portuguese suffers at the end, but so do the remaining subjects. I’ve been noticing as of late that younger people are committing a lot of mistakes by treating internet writing and formal writing as if they were interchangeable; other people do not develop the needed skills to properly write in a formal style throughout their school years, which in turn causes them to fail the universities’ admittance exams.
          I’m not against linguistic variety, but the context in which a certain style is being used must match the situation properly. Yes, languages are flexible, but being aware of what you can do, and when you can do is of prime importance. Coming up with weird constructions, collocations and whatnot and labeling that as a form of ~language art~ is careless, to say the least.
          Also, there are many accents and dialects around here, a lot of different pronunciation possibilities and grammar peculiarities depending on the region you’re on, but only 1 of these is socially accepted as being the role model people need to follow when writing. I think this is commonplace everywhere.
        2. SpoonyViking says:
          Yes and no. Portuguese teaching in general – even in college – tends to focus a lot on normative grammar, often in detriment of actual writing skills, so it seems like the situation would be different. In practice, though, most schools (both public and private) are ruled by the mentality of “as long as the students can pass the class, everything is fine” (and later, in high school, “just teach them enough so they can pass the college admission exam, everything else is irrelevant”) and don’t really care about imparting actual linguistic skills – particularly critical analysis and coherent writing. Even in college, I only learned how to write an academic paper because I took a Scientific Initiation (I guess you guys would call it Undergrad Research) course – and I went to a university which is considered prestigious around here.

          EDIT: It’s basically what Farla says below: “Because so long as we don’t check how badly kids are doing, it can’t reflect badly on the school!”

          Outside of school, most people don’t really care about learning Portuguese; or rather, they think they already know everything simply by virtue of being native speakers. There’s also a strong mentality of “as long as people understand you, anything goes”.

    2. Farla says:
      I took both AP lit classes and we didn’t learn grammar beyond a couple style considerations for essays – admittedly, my school got away with a lot of shit, so that may not have been normal, but my brother went to a nice charter school and didn’t learn it, and I’ve seen what those kids produce now and it sure doesn’t look like anything’s changed.

      It was a thing where what I thought was right — attempting to help kids and change this system — took a back seat to my mental health. I just, emotionally, couldn’t do it.

      Honestly, that sounds like the best decision – if you were mentally up for it, you’d probably just have beat yourself to death on a wall. All my student-level experience has been that it’s not teachers being lazy but it actually getting banned by the higher ups. Because so long as we don’t check how badly kids are doing, it can’t reflect badly on the school!

      I always wonder — do they also think Chinese and Spanish are playgrounds? Or is it just a mix of ignorance, self-importance, and subtle racism that lead them to bastardize their own language as if it’s some special animal Unlike Those Other Languages?

      See you’re assuming people know other languages have grammar instead of just being a pile of words they don’t understand. Like, look at the German justification for capitalization – there’s only one person in the whole echo chamber who even knew that much! People are still telling me that the creators of Pokemon get to decide its capitalization!

      1. An Author's Pen says:
        Taking Latin was basically the only reason I came out of high school
        understanding grammar. I still say things like, “It has to be ‘whom’
        because it’s in the accusative — I mean, the objective case!”

        and having one teacher who was on a crusade against ‘to be’ verbs also
        helped – though I only understood conjugation was a thing because of
        middle school Spanish. sigh

        I think exposure to other languages is an important way to better understand the language you grew up speaking. You’re forced to look at language as a semi-logical construction, with rules, not just as how people talk.

      2. actonthat says:
        Ah, see, we had an AP Language course. That I actually didn’t take, oddly enough, but the required reading included things like Eats, Shoots and Leaves.

        Because so long as we don’t check how badly kids are doing, it can’t reflect badly on the school!

        Last Week Tonight actually did a really good bit about how the current public school system screws over everyone below admin level, from students to teachers who have no choice but to capitulate or lose their jobs. The whole thing is fucking depressing.

        See you’re assuming people know other languages have grammar instead of just being a pile of words they don’t understand.

        The whole thing makes me uncomfortable in this really Anglocentric way? Like I’m 100% sure this is a type of cultural superiority going on that people are too caught up in themselves to notice.

    3. Negrek says:
      Foreign language classes were definitely some of the first exposure a lot of students in my high school had to grammar rules. It’s pretty hard to learn Spanish without being able to distinguish verb forms.

      My school district was really quite good with English instruction, though. We went over basic parts of speech and sentence diagramming in middle school (eigth grade iirc, maybe seventh). In high school we did some work with sentence structure, compound sentences, complex sentences, gerund phrases, etc. This is where I picked up my peevishness over correctly punctuating compound sentences (comma and conjunction, or semicolon!); it was definitely one of our teacher’s peeves, too. One of my friends was constantly getting dinged for comma splices in his essays, and he couldn’t figure out what was up with them at all. XD In AP courses we went over more stylistic vocab type stuff, like metaphor, hyperbole, synechdoche, etc. In college we were pretty much assumed to know all that already, but we did get some instruction in stuff like passive voice and figurative language.

      So yeah, my experience was definitely atypical, but some places do still teach mechanics. I was really fortunate to have a lot of fantastic teachers and none of this descriptivist bullshit. You learn the rules before you break them, and you use the conventions appropriate to the audience you’re writing for, goddammit.

      1. actonthat says:
        My grade school was also really big on grammar. I went to a private school, though. I have no idea what my local public schools were like.
    4. Rydia of Mist says:
      In primary school, yes, they no longer care. Teachers are literally taught to give no fucks about grammar.

      Goodness, is it really that bad? I’ve heard many times that the eduction system in the USA is flawed, but that’s just… wow.

      Where I grew up (Snowdonia, Wales), it’s compulsory for students in state schools to study Welsh up until the age of sixteen. You can either attend English-medium schools, which teach English as a first language and Welsh as a second, or Welsh-medium schools, which do the opposite. In either case, you naturally end up learning quite a bit about the rules of grammar.

      Additionally, our curriculum just cares a lot more about grammar and syntax in general. I learnt about the future perfect progressive tense before I knew what similes and metaphors were. English language and English literature are also often taught as separate subjects from age 14 onwards, with the former being compulsory and the latter being optional.

      In Key Stage 1 (ages 4 to 7), you learn about the three simple tenses, gerunds, the five basic forms of punctuation (comma, question mark, exclamation mark, apostrophe, full stop), contractions, nouns (including those of the proper variety), adjectives, verbs, adverbs, imperatives and pluralisation.

      In Key Stage 2 (ages 7 to 11), you learn about dialogue, the progressive and perfect tenses, prefixes, roots, suffixes, main and subordinate clauses, prepositions, preposition and noun phrases, compound and complex sentences, subjunctive and conditional moods, abstract nouns, pronouns, modal verbs, subordinating and co-ordinating conjunctions, synonyms, antonyms, homonyms, subjects and objects, active and passive voices, determiners and every other form of punctuation except the ellipsis for some reason.

      Everything in Key Stages 3 (ages 11 to 14) and 4 (ages 14 to 16) is mostly just filling in the gaps. You learn about the ellipsis at some point, as well as all pretty much all of the other tenses and moods. If you opt to do English literature in Key Stage 4, you’re taught how to analyse and write fiction texts. Since everyone has to do English language, we’re all taught how to analyse and write non-fiction texts.

      I always wonder — do they also think Chinese and Spanish are playgrounds? Or is it just a mix of ignorance, self-importance, and subtle racism that lead them to bastardize their own language as if it’s some special animal Unlike Those Other Languages?

      I have to say, a couple of the English and Scottish people that I’ve met at university have been bemused to find out that their language isn’t the only one with rules. Thankfully, since everyone here has to study a modern foreign language (i.e. French, Spanish, Portuguese, German or Italian) in Key Stage 3, people like that are rare and mostly come from independent schools.

      1. Farla says:
        I’ve heard many times that the eduction system in the USA is flawed, but that’s just… wow.

        I once got into an argument in class with my teacher about how the holocaust wasn’t an example of natural selection. She wasn’t even a nazi. She’d just fucked up on the difference between natural and artificial selection that bad when trying to explain it.

        America! We have a fuckton of nukes!

        1. Ember says:
          So then, it would have been natural selection if you’d picked up a sharpened pencil and stabbed her in the throat, right?
          1. Farla says:
            She would probably have argued through the blood that it was artificial selection because I was doing something on purpose.
            1. Ember says:
              …Did she think the Holocaust did not involve anyone doing things on purpose? Germany just accidentally six million Jewish people?
              1. Farla says:
                I don’t know! I made a couple guesses at the time as to what she meant to say when telling us Jewish people died because they were unsuited to their environment, and she seemed to have no idea what I was talking about with each one.

                Honestly she was kind of shaky about if dog breeds were really artificial selection so maybe she was just anti-prescriptivist about definitions in general and there was no reason.

    5. Keleri says:
      Yeah, in Alberta there is absolutely zero grammar taught in
      schools, and it seems to be the case here in Ontario as well. I learned
      about nouns/verbs/adjectives etc. from
      Schoolhouse Rock on american TV or from the Jumpstart computer games from the

      In high school french, THEN we started
      touching on verb tenses and such because you
      actually do have to approach language somewhat systematically to learn a
      new one. I took French in elementary and junior high school as well but it was
      a fucking mess at that level because for some reason the teachers refused to approach it systematically.
      We might have done a liiiiittle bit of
      creative writing rules/dialog punctuation in junior high… only it was taught wrong and badly,
      because I remember making some of the
      classic dialog blunders in my early fanfics, and I would have been better off
      just looking at ANY PUBLISHED BOOK to check the rules through example.

      High school english was all literature analysis and repeating what the teacher
      thought was

      right on essays. Personally my conspiracy theory is that, when I look back on all my english teachers, they were
      all fundamentally kind of batshit and I
      almost don’t think that they knew or wanted to teach

      english grammar systematically. There’s almost something… mathy about grammar, and my high school english teachers
      especially were the type of people who would
      throw their hands up and give up and go “I don’t have to think logically! I’m quirky!”

      Also the wrapping/line breaks went nuts in this comment and I’m sorry, wtf

  4. illhousen says:
    Eesh, some people really love inventing their own enemies is all I have to say about it.

    “Hopefully by then they’ll manage respect that I’m quite fulfilled with
    my current black quadrant situation, stop ignoring nontraditional
    relationships you bigot!!1!”

    Wait, you mean you have someone you hate mutually? I thought you were keeping it casual. Come on, give us details!

    (Also, all FFN quotes are in white text.)

    1. Farla says:
      I’m currently in a serious relationship with Stupid Meta And Related Fanfic. Stop being so personocentric as to believe I have to be in hate with a “someone”!!!!!!!!!
  5. SpoonyViking says:
    *sigh* I’m finishing my Masters in an Applied Linguistics course. I fully support acknowledging the existence of linguistic prejudices and fighting them, and I understand the point of descriptive grammar even if I tend to be more on the conservative side. That said, I hate the people who say “anything goes when writing” more than AM hates humanity. Go read actual novels instead of only reading shitty fanfiction, bloody wankers.
    1. actonthat says:
      The most infuriating thing to me about it is that prescriptive grammar allows for dialect. There’s even a word for it! Linguistic register!

      And dialects follow very strict internal grammars! Like, it’s so ridiculously racist and horrible to assume that those stupid poor people, you know which ones can’t possibly learn a real language, so let them talk their nonsense in peace, when the truth is they’re actually speaking a very complex language with its own prescriptive rules that doesn’t get acknowledged even by self-proclaimed ~progressives~ because Murrica has its head so far up its ass when it comes to education.

      The whole “stop telling Group X to use grammar” is an argument so incredibly bigoted and ignorant that just thinking about it makes me want to throw things so now I’m going to go pet a dog.

      1. Farla says:
        No Act you are the old racist 19th century white man.

        And then Act was a dictionary.

      2. SpoonyViking says:
        I know, right? Plus, how can they defend “as long as others understand you, it’s fine” when they undermine the very system which lets others understand them?!
        1. Roarke says:
          One thing I’ve always hated about the “as long as they understand you” is like, ti’s etaredisnocni ot eht redaer, ohw nac, htiw troffe, dnatsrednu levird, tub yhw dluow uoy ecrof meht ot od eht artxe krow?
          1. actonthat says:
            gah that was cruel
            1. Roarke says:
              It’s a purposeful deviation from normal rules of grammar and spelling, which I made to enforce a point.

              The cruelty is just a bonus.

          2. SpoonyViking says:
            My consolation is that this must certainly have taken a lot more effort from you to write it than for me to read it. :-P
            1. Roarke says:
              Nah, I just used a backwards text generator. /lazy
              1. SpoonyViking says:
                Well-played, good sir. Well-played, indeed.
    2. Farla says:
      The worst part is all they’re doing is ruining its legitimate uses. “Hey these people did a cool thing by ignoring the rule.” YES AND YOU’RE FUCKING IT UP BY DOING IT FOR NO REASON AND DESTROYING ITS IMPACT.

      It’s like the one who was arguing that the fact the talking pokemon starter didn’t have a name had this whole implied backstory. It doesn’t! Not when every other fanfic just does that with no explanation, you can’t use that to imply anything because there’s nothing at all different or noteworthy because absolutely every last fic does that!

      1. SpoonyViking says:
        Indeed! They just look at the surface and ignore the actual point of what was done.
  6. PostguestivePostistPhase says:
    My eyes started glazing over at like 3rd longform tumble quote thing and stopped soon. But that was more than enough to get the senpai!!! undercurrent.

    Are all fanfiction people this bored? This is the internet; there’s millions of things to waste time with when you don’t feel like reading/writing fanfiction, such as cat videos and porn (and probably cat porn exists too), yet they’re wasting their time on this craptacular drama? Why?*

    *I actually know why.

    1. Farla says:
      Lion sex is actually legitimately hilarious in a misandrist way, 10/10 would lol again.
      1. SpoonyViking says:
        Misandrist? *reads up on lion mating habits, watches videos* Oh, that is funny, indeed. Although I am amazed that lions also perform oral sex. Who knew those lazy bastards could be so considerate? :-P
  7. Negrek says:
    Well, at least most of the people peripherally involved just seem really young and earnest… it’s really just the author themselves who comes across as an ass for encouraging them. Holy small name, big ego, Batman.

    I don’t know that the solar system is large enough to contain all my hatred for the whole prescriptivist/descriptivist crap that’s shown up in fanfic circles over the past few years. It was eye-rolling enough back in the day when you just had hissy fits over “it’s my STYLE you can’t tell me it’s wrong because e e cummings.” The shift to “it’s my STYLE you can’t tell me it’s wrong because -ist” is just gross. Bonus points for following up “you can’t call my dialogue punctuation wrong, that’s racist!” with “no you HAVE to capitalize all the pokemons, it’s the RULE the giant soulless corporation SAYS SO.”

    Next up: those reviews I actually owe I’m so sorry Negrek.

    No worries, this was definitely more important. And like I said, don’t feel obligated to slog through the whole thing–it was already long when I requested the review, and it’s gotten substantially longer since. (New chapter coming out this week, too. ;))

  8. Joe says:
    As someone who hasn’t written anything, and hasn’t been educated in any kind of language skill beyond the their/there/they’re level, I don’t really understand the importance of grammar.

    I assumed it was important because people who were very insightful on other topics said it was, but the arguments of anti-perscriptivists(?) seem compelling. Doesn’t writing follow language, which has no rules or limitations so long as it fulfills the speaker’s purpose? If certain facets of grammar aren’t taught properly until higher academia, how can it be said that they’re important to know? Are people who aren’t using grammar properly lacking some avenue for comminucation in writing, and how would you demonstrate it? If languages all have different grammar, why is the one that is correct for the language I’m speaking necessarily superior? Why can’t I invent a pronoun or other grammar construct, use it like jargon, and rely on the reader to become familiar with it through context or seek reference materials to understand it like a word?

    That’s not to validate the shitty behavior of the pictured writers, but it seems like grammar arguments take up a large portion of this blog’s fanfiction critique, and while everyone here has a strong stance on it, it doesn’t immediately make sense to me like most of the other criticism.

    1. Mini-Farla says:
      Mainly, I think it’s for consistency. If you don’t have a consistent way of communicating to other groups of people, you don’t have a language. A good example of this is the Canterbury Tales, which were written before the printing press standardized spelling. Notice that it is nearly impossible to understand, but Shakespeare, which was written only about a century later, is pretty readable.

      That’s where this “descriptivism forever!!!” mentality leads. If you want your writing to only be comprehensible to the small group of people in your town who speak your dialect, then go ahead. If you don’t, please stick to the rulebook.

      (The standard rules also just make more sense. If you acknowledge that language evolves over long periods of time, then it logically follows that what is generally accepted as correct must have floated to the top for a reason, yes?)

      1. actonthat says:
        Fun fact — Homeric Greek is also a fake dialect that was never actually spoken! And then, as with Shakespeare, people refused to stop writing in it because they were pretentious. So Homer, Hesiod, etc all wrote in this pseudo-Greek that no one actually spoke.
      2. SpoonyViking says:
        If you acknowledge that language evolves over long periods of time, then it logically follows that what is generally accepted as correct must have floated to the top for a reason, yes?

        Yes, but did it float to the top for linguistic reasons, or for social and ideological ones?
        I mean, I tend to be more of a conservative when it comes to grammar, but let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Proper descriptive grammar (as in, not the bastardisation defended by so many) has many valid uses.

        1. Mini-Farla says:
          Yes, but did it float to the top for linguistic reasons, or for social and ideological ones?

          I think the social and ideological shoehorns don’t stand the test of time, precisely because they have no value. Does anyone really take the “never split infinitives” rule seriously nowadays, for instance?

          I’m not against proper descriptive grammar, but it’s like Act said — do it for a purpose, not just because you can. My point is mainly that the standard rules have a purpose too, and if you want to break from that you need to have a good reason for it.

          1. SpoonyViking says:
            I think the social and ideological shoehorns don’t stand the test of time, precisely because they have no value.

            Actually, they do. :-) The “never split infinitives” “rule” isn’t an example of what I’m talking about, I’m referring to things like “this pronunciation and no other is the correct one”, things like that.

            1. Mini-Farla says:
              Oh, actually that’s a whole other can of worms. Act could probably explain this better, but the linguistic rules and evolution for spoken and written language are completely different. You can’t teach people how to speak “properly”, but you can teach people how to write properly, because writing is arbitrary and speech isn’t.
              1. actonthat says:
                Yeah, you can’t really discuss written and spoken grammars the same way. They’re related but very different, as written grammar is necessarily less flexible so that all kinds of English-speakers can understand it, and it evolves more slowly in the interest of preserving meaning. There’s also not really such thing as dialect in writing (in modern English). You can write *in* dialect, but the writing itself it still grammatical in the same way of writing not in dialect.

                Meanwhile, whether or not an accent is seen as a “good” accent is almost entirely a sociological thing and bears very little relation to grammar. The way some white kid in Manhattan chats with their friends and the way some black kid does the same are linguistically completely equivalent, or the ways young women talk versus young men, and it’s only a desire to marginalize one of the groups that creates weird hierarchies. There’s not actually any scientific reason behind it and it doesn’t actually have anything to do with grammar or writing. People backform rules and ~but grammar~ reasoning to justify their oppressiveness, but it’s misinformation at best.

              2. SpoonyViking says:
                But the written language is also influenced by sociological reasons. For instance, here in Portuguese we have a word for people of mixed black and white ancestry, “mulato”, is considered offensive in many circles because it derives from the Portuguese word for “mule” – and yet, it follows all the proper morphological rules and is grammatically correct in every way, so it has the weight of linguistic tradition behind it.

                That said, I think I simply misunderstood what Mini-Farla was talking about, which is more about the language’s internal rules and structures than its usage in a social environment. Right, MF? I’d only argue that a language’s continuous development process, even when it comes to grammar, isn’t entirely free of sociological influences – or even just historical ones. Isn’t it said that if the Great Vowel Shift had happened 100 years earlier, the spelling of several English words would be much less inconsistent?

              3. actonthat says:
                I’m a bit confused as to what you’re getting at xD Can we start over?
              4. SpoonyViking says:
                Heh, sorry, that’s entirely on my end. :-) Basically, I’m saying that although language has rules and systems, at least some of those rules and systems stay in place or change based on factors other than pure grammar.
              5. actonthat says:
                No worries ^^;

                And I would say — it depends. I think that a rule can only be enforced from a sociological standpoint if it is also able to function from a grammatical one. The crusade for a gender-neutral pronoun other than the singular “they” is a quintessential example. There’s just nothing about introducing a new pronoun that’s going to work when we already have one we use for the same purpose. Similarly, I think you’d be hard-pressed to enforce an oppressive construct — like, say, Spanish using male pronouns for groups as long as there’s one male — if it didn’t also serve a linguistic function — in that case, it makes it easier to choose a pronoun quickly. It’s also why it’s very, very hard to equalize a linguistic feature once it’s made its way into the lexicon.

                Basically, I think people absolutely make grammatical standard from positions other than “this is the best scientifically,” but even the most bigoted standard won’t work if it isn’t also logically grammatical. Not all squares are rectangles etc etc

      3. Golgi says:
        Shakespeare may have had more standardized spelling (I’m not actually sure), but most people don’t get to see it. The copies we have of Shakespeare’s works were set into type by various people with various spelling styles. Modern editions of Shakespeare’s work generally draw from multiple sources and re-spell words according to modern spelling.
    2. actonthat says:
      First of all, grammar is innate. Just because you don’t know the intricacies of written grammar doesn’t mean you don’t know it. You’re using it right now; it’s how we’re communicating. Beyond that, a “speaker’s purpose” is almost always “to be understood.” The purpose of grammar is to facilitate understanding.

      Or, as someone smarter than me put it:

      We have codified the process of writing for a reason. The rules of writing aren’t there to smother creativity or keep people from having their own style. We have rules for writing so we may safe-keep ideas. When the capsule of a sentence is broken into, it should form in the reader’s mind as close as possible to the shape that appeared in the author’s. Rules guide us how to efficiently pack and unpack ideas in text.

      Let’s be clear: I don’t believe in the technical rules of writing out of some abiding respect for law and order. I don’t even believe the rules should always be followed. I adore the way E.E. Cummings transcends the page by completely disregarding “proper” form. Accessible, natural writing often steps around the technical rules to capture streams of consciousness and realistic dialogue. The vital point, however, is that when the written word wanders away from conventional rules, it ought to be moving toward something. Color outside the lines, yes, but do so because you’re drawing a new picture, not because you’re scribble-checking whether the ballpoint pen still has ink.

      What the tumblrina is too caught up in herself to even realize is that her examples of “bad grammar” follow these codified ideas. If I type with ALL CAPS as a way to show someone was quiet and softspoken it wouldn’t make any sense. If I did a long, puntuation-lite sentence as a way to show careful, deliberate thought, you’d be confused. These deviations from the norm serve a purpose, and a very strict one.

      If you want to spew nonsense, go ahead — but know that no one will understand you. And if you’re not writing to be understood, to communicate, wtf are you trying to do? That’s the crux of Farla’s capitalization argument, by the way — capitalizing everything removes meaning, and makes it harder to decode intent.

      Incidentally, you could opt to write a story with an internal grammar — Chuck Palhaniuk’s Pygmy is a brilliant example of this. But it only works because it is consistent and follows its own rules, so your brain can figure out those rules and interpret. If every page or even chapter those rules were different, it would be impossible to read.

      I’m not sure where you get the idea one language’s grammar is “superior” to another. Languages evolve like animals. The goal is to better serve an environmental purpose. Just because bats fly and mice scamper doesn’t mean bats are “better” than mice. Japanese using SOV construction isn’t “worse” than English using SVO construction. It’s just different. They key is internal consistency. Over time, rules that no longer serve a purpose will be weeded out — the who/whom distinction comes to mind. And new rules will be introduced. The goal isn’t to make language “better,” it’s to make it more efficient to communicate in that language. Languages that can’ or won’t do this die out in favor of ones that will. Extant languages meet their needs in different ways, yes, but the core isn’t how they do it, it’s that the needs are met. Fly, run, swim, you’re moving either way.

      If certain facets of grammar aren’t taught properly until higher academia, how can it be said that they’re important to know?

      You know how people complain that Kids These Days get to college not knowing basic things? This is one of those basic things. (Other basic things include “math” and “science.”) Many, many people can’t string a sentence together. Our education system is a failure. It’s a nightmare.

      And finally, the idea that because you don’t know something you should never learn or care and neither should anyone else is abhorrent to me. Put in some fucking effort and stop assuming that just because you don’t understand something no one does.

      1. SpoonyViking says:
        …Well, damn. Can I just copy and paste this, Act? I really don’t think I could have explained it so clearly and coherently as you just did.

        Oh, and I loved the quoted passage! Who is the author?

        1. actonthat says:
          Dana from Reasoning with Vampires, which sadly has stopped updated.

          And yeah, put it everywhere, I’d be more than happy xD

          1. SpoonyViking says:
            Reasoning with Vampires? I have a feeling I’ve seen that site floating around somewhere, but I don’t think I ever read it. Time for some archive binging. :-)
            And thanks!
      2. Joe says:
        Awesome, thanks for the indepth reply!

        Both the explanations of grammar (as an agreed-upon baseline meant to preserve meaning through the adherence or intentional non-adherence to a referenceable standard, and as an inferred set of rules meant to preserve meaning by mediating between people’s “hardwired” but largely subconscious internal grammars) are compelling and thorough. However, in some aspects they seem to conflict.

        For instance, How can languages evolve and discard rules for better communication if grammar is innate from early life and elastic to change, to the point that you can’t make new pronouns? And how do languages that can’t make incremental improvements this way die when learning a second language after a certain developmental window is such a large individual investment? Does the proliferation of Mandarin, Spanish, and English provide evidence of their superiority (in terms of updating themselves to become better to communicate with) and if not, why is it ridiculous to think that they could be improved by adding a pronoun or something similar?

        1. Joe says:
          Ignore this, you answered most of it later in the thread and I didn’t notice. Sorry!
    3. Farla says:
      Why can’t I invent a pronoun

      Oh, you can, but you can’t use it. Seriously, try it sometime out loud. You can add other types of words fine, but the way English works means that if you try to add a new pronoun you’ll trip up within a few sentences. That’s why “they” is our gender-neutral pronoun – there may be many reasons why it’s not the best, but you can’t use a brand-new one in speech. Not “aren’t allowed”, but “will not consistently come out of your mouth, and will start getting shunted toward noun or adjective as your sentences twist away from you.” It’s seriously annoying! Other languages with a different structure are more malleable.

      Another issue is that spoken language actually has a ton of invisible coding – we know this because different brain injuries can knock out different parts of speech. People who can’t understand words can sometimes follow and participate in conversations because they can still follow intonation, and people who’ve gotten intonation knocked out have absurd degrees of difficulty with speech even though they still have all the words – and furthermore, those people adapt by moving toward speaking in something resembling prose, which does have enough structure to be understood without intonation.

      1. Rydia of Mist says:
        Oh, you can, but you can’t use it. Seriously, try it sometime out loud. You can add other types of words fine, but the way English works means that if you try to add a new pronoun you’ll trip up within a few sentences.

        I’d argue that “e” isn’t that difficult to say. If you try it out for a few sentences, it’s actually quite easy to get used to. Certainly more so than “xe”.

        1. Farla says:
          Well, I’d counter-argue that one’s really a shortening of a pronoun that takes advantage of the fact doing so gets you the same sound for both – you’re not introducing a new word but just slurring a bit for practical reasons.

          Which brings up the problem that people just correct you. I’d use ‘e all the time for pet animals and people always told me its specific gender, so it’s not a true gender neutral, it’s more of a gender inconclusive.

          1. Rydia of Mist says:
            Fair point. The fact that some people want new pronouns to distinguish between “neither”, “both” and “unknown” when it comes to gender doesn’t make things any easier.
      2. Joe says:
        So essentially, your language’s grammar is a largely immutable part of it, and the rules are aids to ensure they’re not butchered when turned into text, which will inevitably be read by someone with that same internal rulebook? That makes sense, thanks!

        Does this mean that grammar changes at a different rate than other parts of a language, since it’s more deeply ingrained than, say, word choice?

        1. Farla says:
          We actually don’t know quite what’s up with grammar!

          We know that grammar is innate, because kids raised hearing enough words will end up creating a language with one – grammarless pidgin to grammartastic creole. But also, if you don’t grow up hearing enough words, you can’t understand grammar (and will attempt to offload the problem onto an enormous number of individual words). And despite grammar rules being automatic, what rules vary widely. We know some types of grammar are more common in human languages than others, but we aren’t sure if that’s just chance.

  9. Septentrion Euchoreutes says:
    I really wish there was a stream of people who did the Farla Quest properly and get full reviews. Very few people seem to be offering legit reviews and it’s a very rare opportunity.

    While I do like legit reviews, I’m not donating 13 reviews anytime soon. This “saga” basically proves that when lazy people obsess over the most boring fics instead of proper trainwrecks.

  10. Socordya says:

    Within a few days they’ll forget they have the tag but keep posting updates untagged.

    That’s the real crime, here. Proper tagging is what separate humankind from animals.

    Seriously, I feel sorry for you. You obviously put effort into this reviewing thing, it sucks it gets maligned like that.

    1. Farla says:
      Tumblr is where proper tagging goes to die.

      And don’t be – this is actually pretty mild and I already got my revenge by doing it last while they posted about why wasn’t their review here yet?!

  11. Socordya says:
    I think you should refer people who are butthurt about your reviews to this very important course on how to handle criticism.
  12. sadly relevant says:
    “Typo”? Actually, it’s a subversion of grammatical imperialism, but I’m not surprised you don’t understand.
    — Guy In Your MFA ‏@GuyInYourMFA
  13. Margie says:
    This is hilarious. Really hilarious.
    I can see that your skills as a writer shine through while to take a joke so seriously. My sides are hurting from laughing so hard.
    You are literally the butt of a huge joke. These people don’t take you seriously whatsoever. They think it’s a knee-slapper that you try “so hard” to do something “so vastly important”. That’s because it is a knee-slapper. Moreover, it’s then ridiculously hysterical that you ACTUALLY have a following that believes that your half-assed effort to be smart is greatly superior to someone who LITERALLY HAS A DEGREE IN ENGLISH (then little kids who are just starting to write. It’s not like you weren’t once them). Seriously, where do you get off doing things like this? You don’t follow the basic rules of English and, to me, it seems that you believe it in creating some weird branch of unorthodox rules for your own disposal. Also, the fact that this makes you so oblige to make a Julius Cesar themed troll blog post about it, yet you don’t put forth the effort to look up everything said about you VASTLY shows that you really are doing this for shit and giggles. And on top of that, how you write that “there’s a way for people to avoid review!1!” OH. MY GOD. Like people should give a rip about YOU?? Oh my god that’s so egotistical of you. I cannot believe what I’m reading. Good lord. Oh wait, but it’s not over yet!! For the rest of your blog post, you, yet again, seriously respond as if this is a threat to you! What, you’re afraid that you’ll fall of your Throne of Stupidity because these people think of you as a joke. No, scratch that. You ARE a joke and you don’t even know THAT. The only purpose I’m seeing is that you don’t have the skills to do anything else but sit on you buttocks, fapping to the reviews of people who cannot even begin to understand the method behind you madness because it logically makes no sense! You believe that creating your own rules of English will make you something special, something important, when, in reality, you’ve got nothing. You are literally on the same plane of existence as everyone else. Pipe the fuck down.

    I don’t know about your personal life, as you don’t know about mine and numerous others, but I know that there is not a single perfect human being on this planet. Nothing and nobody can be perfect because everything can be improved on. If what you’re striving for is perfection, then you’re on a infinite loop of nothingness. Nobody, including you, will never be perfect. Perfection is simply a rootless desire wishes by everyone to climb to high authority over yourself. And while you’re not wrong in the fact that pointing out factors in ones work that need to be improved on, you need to know that you’re vastly far from providing true help to those you “attempt” to help. If your review doesn’t make sense to the writer of the story you reviewed, that doesn’t mean “oh they’re dumb and I’m smart”, it means that you either a) didn’t explain it well enough, b) you’re not making any logical sense, and c) you’re not accommodating to what kind of person they could be and what they know about writing. Teaching them stuff they don’t understand yet it the exact opposite of what a reviewer should be doing.

    How dare you call yourself a reputable reviewer if you’re not doing this for others, but for your own satisfaction and material fame! From what you show of yourself, you’re nothing but a snob! You’ve got to realize that FanFiction and of the similar isn’t professional and that these people will never publish their stories! It’s for the fun and joy of expressing ones thoughts and feelings out to the outside world. The only point is that the story had effort and time put into it rather than the nit-picky BS that you deem so important to something not as serious as you come to believe.

    I would appreciate if you’d ease up a bit and reconsider all your actions. I can tell that you don’t understand the purpose and concept of the format, which is something that, if you’re going to make such a serious ordeal over, you need to know before you go off and review while sitting, waiting for the weary to drop to their knees and beg you for your false knowledge.

    1. Farla says:
      This was definitely the best way to convince me no one cares.
    2. actonthat says:
      LOL! Write more essays about how little you care.
  14. silversheath says:
    Wow. This is really creepy. I don’t really know what to say other than sorry you have to put up with this stuff.

    I’ve been reading your blog for a while now, and honestly, I think I’d shit myself/ cry/ both if you were to review anything of mine… But I really don’t understand this angry mob mentality. Why do they care so much? They should either improve their writing if their aggression stems from insecurity, or block if they don’t like your review style. I don’t know what I’m trying to say here but this baffles me.

    1. Farla says:

      Well, just like how my words are words and as capable of being wrong as any, I look at other people’s words and, if they turn out to be a frothing pile of lunacy, decide not to give weight to them. It takes a bit of practice but it’s nice once you’re able to turn off the part of your brain that says “but if somebody said it, I need to worry about it!”

      As to why they’re so mad, I’d guess this is not a worldview they share. The recurring theme throughout is that it doesn’t matter what’s really true, just what they can say that will make people obey them rather than me. If they let me review, some of the people I review will listen to me rather than them, and that’s unacceptable, therefore I must be shouted into silence.

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