Pokemon Author Replies Part 12

“as for the invasion of privacy thing. Say you have a crush and psychic powers, wouldn’t you be at least a little tempted?”

weegee55
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6361578/

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Subject: re: Your review to TulipBlade

A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11764638/

thank you for your feedback, the reason why Gallade and Lilligant were so human like was
because they are two pokemon that are relatively close to humans in terms of behavior and
biology. Both are bipedal, one wears a dress and the other uses swords. Thank you for the
criticism and I will work on my dialogue

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re: Your review to The College Outcast
Feb 1Glaceon of shadowA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11744460/

it’s been fixed

Review to Hunting
Feb 1ShinySilverOwl001Sorry I haven’t responded until now. I make it a habit to read my reviewer’s bio before I respond to their review and I hope you don’t show this to that site you had in there…

Anywho… I’m just letting you know that the absol’s name is not really “Evening”. It’s something else. But I won’t reveal it because I’m working on the story he and Echoes come from… Yeah…

The main story will build up to their predicament. (Please don’t spoil it for others, I have a fun idea planned out…) And later I’ll show what they all went through. For your convenience, I’ll go ahead and tell you the story. If you don’t want to see it, scroll down to the cap letters saying “spoilers end here”.

SPOILERS
Black the absol is taking the eight-day challenge to become the champion of the moor (of Iccirus). After his first day, some other pokemon find out a ninetales named Freya has been murdered… Quite brutally. It isn’t until Black has completed day seven until everyone figures out he killed Freya and the absol is sentenced to death by rockslide.

Through the investigation, it turns out what had happened was Freya was about to kill Black because she hates him and his species. Why she did this was because absols had foretold her mother’s, mate’s, and pups’ deaths (you know, absols get blamed for crimes they didn’t commit?), and now her foster-daughter, a weavile named Moonrise, is expecting Black’s cubs. Black was also Freya’s foster-son, but he was treated poorer than Moonrise was. So in a panic to escape Freya’s grip, Black struck her neck and at first watched in horror at what he’d done, but the horror turns to vengeance as he watches her die from blood loss and walks away when she’s finally dead.

When Black is taken to be executed, he drags Moonrise into the debris with him and both are assumed dead until some other pokemon who live in the moor clear the debris and find no bodies, only some blood stained on a few rocks. Turns out, they aren’t and from then on, Black, assuming the name Evening, and Moonrise, assuming the name Echoes, live outside of the moor with their cubs and never return to their former home. Maybe.

It’s super-old, I came up with it when I was like, twelve. If you read it, I hope you could help me polish it or something. If you don’t want to help me polish it, I’m fine with that too.

SPOILERS END HERE
If you didn’t read the story and wanted to be surprised… I don’t blame you. But I would like some help on it, if you don’t mind. I am picking their backstory back up.

Thank you for your time. :)

Pokemon Revenge of Kurai stuff
Feb 1Doug UnderscoreA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11760154/

My gosh all those mistakes are embarrassing. Okay, let’s see how I can fix them.

Okay, so, I made Blue a big idiot. The first thing I can fix easily is that he’ll have to learn pokemon battle stuff in order to graduate, which is useless but popularly needed, and possibly pokemon legends as well.

Pokemon are apart of history, and I’ll make sure that’s in, instead he’ll hate how they are apart of it, ‘pokemon caused wars, I’ll do so research to find out how.

The Pokehatu Pro. or however I spelled it, I’ll find some science people to help me put in some more science explanation to it.

Thanks for pointing these things out, I will take my time to do more research before I redo it. All ‘n’ all, what do you think of the story? Do you think it has potential, interesting even?

weegee55
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6361578/

Reply link: https://www.fanfiction.net/pm2/post.php?rid=174338119#new
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Subject: re: Your review to Too Cute

A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11761479/

again I’m going to try to work on the dialogue, as for the invasion of privacy thing. Say
you have a crush and psychic powers, wouldn’t you be at least a little tempted?

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re: Your review to Sacred Grounds: Guardians of Evolution
Feb 1Sap1231A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11762535/

That clears a lot of things up, thanks!

Rosemary’s Locket Prequel – Review
Feb 1SilverFire121Thank you for taking the time to properly read my story and putting the effort in to make it better. I was never sure about the capitalization of the names of pokemon, so thanks for clearing that up for me. I tried to research it before but couldn’t find any answers. I’d also like to thank you for clearing up how to properly write speaking. I’m 15 and in grade 10, so far, no teacher has properly explained how to do that.

I would also like to explain about Strikers name, I’m going to add this into the writing as well. Striker didn’t have a proper name, he was just known as Treecko. So, Dakota named him. I don’t know how I forgot to write that in the actual story. Also, about Striker agreeing with Dakota’s plans, that’s just how it is. Dakota and Striker are both headstrong and tough, they have a lot in common and it is likely he will agree with much of what she says. That’s not to say they won’t have different opinions at some point in the story though. If they ever do disagree with something, it’ll probably cause quite a fight. Dakota will also catch pokemon on her journey that don’t agree with everything about how she works. Her ability to talk with pokemon will be utilized to it’s fullest, she’s just got to get out and meet some more pokemon first.

Whoops! I did mean “cheer”. Thanks.

As a last note, I am really grateful that there are people on here like you. You appear to review quite a few pieces of writing and give useful tips. So, thank you.

I hope you have a good day,
SilverFire121

The naming thing has just made me more and more uncomfortable over time. It’s eerie how the fandom seems to have independently arrived at so many parallels with how people talked about slaves. Is this something that’s just preset in our brains? You show us this situation, and the first thing out of our mouths is, “These inferior creatures need us to tell them what to do, and I shall start off by renaming them!”

re: Your review to Pokemon Isuckatnames!
Feb 1gregthepokemonmasterA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11764813/

Sorry… I really am not familiar with this kind of stuff. I’ll try to fix it in the next chapter.
Ps: Sometimes I press some buttons with the intention of pressing something else.

weegee55
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6361578/

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Subject: reviews

Hey, I’ve noticed that you can be a little harsh in your reviews. You post reviews on a
lot of smaller author stories and well, they don’t have enough fans to show their stories
aren’t complete garbage. For your reviews can you just be a little more positive, show
what you liked about the stories and not just the bad and offer them some advice to
improve.

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re: Your review to kalos high
Feb 2raystartrekA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11749957/

thanks for the review. next time when i write my stories, i’ll make sure that i keep all this in mind..
But, overall how do u like my story..?

re: Your review to Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: The Untold Future
Feb 2AriaLucarioA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11731859/

Um thanks for the encyclopedia review there, I’ve corrected the chapter a bit more. And next time how about you be bit nicer and SUGGEST I do things, not tell me to do them, because when I first read it I took that criticism as a bit more than just constructive.

Almost done! Almost!

8 Comments

  1. SpoonyViking says:
    […]as for the invasion of privacy thing. Say you have a crush and psychic powers, wouldn’t you be at least a little tempted?

    I am amazed at how often this argument pops up, as if people honestly can’t understand the difference between “feeling tempted” and “acting on that temptation”.
    …So, what exactly happened in that story? Did a character read the mind of their crush?




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    1. Ember says:
      Well, Christianity does teach us they are literally the same thing, which is why we need Jesus. Thanks, Christianity!



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      1. SpoonyViking says:
        I thought Christian theological thinking (at least Catholic, but I think Anglican, too) had left that view behind?



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        1. Ember says:
          Yeah, I think it’s less a thing in modern Catholicism, ’cause I mostly hear it brought up in the context of certain kinds of Protestants trying to tell Catholics they are Wrong About Salvation.



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    2. Farla says:
      Read the mind, then messed with the dream and stuff.

      What’s particularly irritating is that my review said that yes, I get that if you were the one with the power, you’d want to, but imagine if you were the one having it done to you, and their reply is to just repeat that they’d want to do it if they could.




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      1. SpoonyViking says:
        […]then messed with the dream and stuff.

        That’s… …quite a bit more than just invasion of privacy.
        But yeah, I’m honestly not surprised by their lack of empathy, unfortunately.




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  2. RandomName says:
    “as for the invasion of privacy thing. Say you have a crush and psychic powers, wouldn’t you be at least a little tempted?”

    I mean I might want to do but God I would never act on that, that’s kinda sick tbh




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  3. Septentrion Euchoreutes says:
    I would think the invasion of privacy is something most people would DO. Whether it’s right or not isn’t something that will even occur to all People will want to use magic powers that they have and it doesn’t take much to convince themselves to use it.

    It’s a very good thing telepathy only exists in fiction.




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