the two dragons myth that were central to the storyline of black/white will be featured as part of a history exhibit.
the myth originates from a culture that is parallel to native
americans,the reason the arceus worshippers are so dominant will also be
explained.

well sorry if Volac makes my character look like a mary sue. shiny
hydreigons look awesome in the first place,and once volac evolves,you’ll
know what i’m talking about.

the invented charges thing with andrea will have an explanation.you’ll just have to wait and see.

i suck at introductions,and this is my first story,so I apologize for the quality.

you seem to think luke is”a ridiculous bully stereotype”. well,i’m no
good at creating bully characters because they all fall into the same
archetype:they always choose their targets based off how “different”they
are.

the battle was,in my opinion,not thoroughly explained. it was just thrown in to give the chapter some redeeming value

finally,the reason i chose unova as my region was because i found that a
region based on america would fit my story much better than a region
based off,say,france,but it’s your opinion.

let me guess,you think it was as bad as attack of mewtwo. well this is
my first time here,so don’t expect to see alphabet soup from me.

Thanks for the review and all the interesting facts!

At the time I only had access to the japensese version and it is mostly
identical except for the names of the people which I changed to the
English version.

Thank you for taking the time and having the patience to write this
review. I’m already looking at the first chapter to get all the grammar
mistakes corrected. Sorry if my English is a bit bad, I’m not a native
English speaker. I’m going to delete your review since it’s a bit
outdated as of the latest update to the story and it could scare away
readers because they might get the impression is pointless. I split the
game into sections, since as you can see the second chapter is Nuvema
Town, indicating it will cover everything that happens in Nuvema Town,
this was merely a literized version of what happens in the Introduction.
Thank you for your comprehension, I’ll clarify that in the first
chapter.

Thanks.

~Dialogue is written as “Hello,” she said or “Hello!” she said, never “Hello.” She said or “Hello.” she said or “Hello,” She said or “Hello” she said~

I’m sorry? That was all pretty much the same ‘ol stuff said over and over again. “Hello!” she said- would never work. Even people in first grade know that when ending a sentence, you always use a capital letter starting your next one. It would have to be “Hello!” She said.

~never “Hello.” She said~

Why the heck not? That is a correct way to write that.
Enough with that crap, shall we go on to the next wrong thing you said?

~You wouldn’t capitalize animal or mouse or dragon, so you shouldn’t capitalize words like pokemon or pikachu or charizard. The only time you should capitalize it is if you’re using it as the pokemon’s name, ie, Ash’s pikachu is called Pikachu. This is because you only capitalize when it’s a proper noun, which are the names of places or things. Similar reasoning should be applied to any other words you’re thinking of capitalizing, like telephone or trainer. Or professor.~

WONG! You always capitalize Pokemon, as it is a PROPER noun. And yes, you do capitalize Charizard, Squirtle, and Professor (in the case it is used like Professor Oak). Do you know ANYTHING about Pokemon?

~Seriously? Two of those are not like the others. Even if you’re trying to keep to Kanto pokemon only, there’s other pokemon that aren’t right next to Pallet.

Anyway, like most of the wake up get pokemon chapters, that was entirely pointless. Start your story where your plot starts, no one is going to be baffled by how your trainer has a pokemon if you fail to show them handed one by a professor.~

Again, see that little red line under the word when you write pokemon? Well, right click, and it will tell you that it should be spelled Pokemon, because that is the correct way to write it. Seriously? You’re SERIOUSLY going to criticize her on THAT? Get a life! She needed two more Pokemon, and chose those two! Get over it! Are you dumb? Did you even read the chapter? Waking up IS where her plot starts! I don’t even know what to say to you. I hope you don’t have any stories, because your common sense and IQ total about -500.

Was the story a bit bad written? Yes, yes it was.
Did the grammar suck? At times.
Was it the best book I have ever read? No, not at all.

But you need to calm down. This was her first story and she is not perfect. Calm down and stop acting like you know everything. You didn’t write the book, and you didn’t like it, so why pick on it? It’s not like she’s going to change it just for you!

Good day,
-Ivy