“It’s satire, I sure know what that word means.”
AceTrainerAndrewhi its me i noticed you wrote a review great i have a editor now but not back then
May 23
kurama no jutsu
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11959017/
Thanks for your advise, I’ll make sure it’s corrected
May 23
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11960711/
I’m slightly confused by your first part, due to the fact that my dialogue was written the way you just said was correct. Could you explain more on that as I did write as “Hello,” or “Hello!”
May 23[“Lower your voices the Baron’s hounds are on their way!” A young faced man cried out]
This is equivalent to the [“Hello,” He said] error in my paragraph. The narration shouldn’t be capitalized here. You make this error consistently throughout the chapter.
[The young man shook his head, “It’s a detachment of about sixty.”]
Here, the narration doesn’t contain a speaking verb, so it requires a period and not a comma. This is equivalent to the [“Hello,” He grinned] error in my paragraph.
NRManiaA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11960660/
That wasn’t a “wow I can’t believe someone has totally ruined this.”
That was a “wow someone gave me something that could help with my writing, this is the first person to do this”
I do appreciate your review and comments on the way I write, because I have not recieved anything about this.
I shall try to correct these mistakes and hopefully do it in the future…
In fact you could help me with that, if I do make this sort of mistake in a future chapter (if you read them, you probably because I AM SO DISAPPOINTING) you could tell me what I did wrong and I can correct it.
also I thought titles were capitalized, but if that is how it is… Okay
One thing I might want to comment on is that with the way it is read, or I should say WHERE it is read. Since I write this on Microsoft Office Word and read through it on word to check for mistakes, I don’t really check it on the website (which I SHOULD) so things that look awkward and not very easy to read on http://www.fanfiction.net look much better on Microsoft Office Word.
Thank you for reviewing.
If you want more writing advice, my mentor Farla has two guides that might be helpful:https://www.fanfiction.net/topic/11834/21887406/1/Writing-Guide-Part-One-Grammarhttps://www.fanfiction.net/topic/11834/142410565/1/Writing-Guide-Part-Two-Story
thanks. I updated the chapter and fixed the mistakes (at least most of them) so if you want to check it out again… go ahead.You have received a message from:
Umbramatic
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2633550/
Reply link: https://www.fanfiction.net/pm2/post.php?rid=184458299#new
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Subject: RE: Yangverse Michronicles review
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11959069/
Er, you said you don’t reply to PMs often but seeing as this was a question I figured I may as well answer it. I’ll try to be polite, but I was a bit confused by your assessment so sorry if I sound hostile; I don’t intend to be.
1. The story featured features Reshiram as one of the two main characters, also mentions Zekrom and Kyurem, and alludes to Joltik and, more subtly, a Generation 6 Pokemon. Your profile states you have not played Black and White due to avoiding spoilers but since it hasn’t been updated since 2011 I’m legitimately unsure how much that’s changed; nevertheless, this story DOES have to do with Pokemon, just happens to be a more slice-of-life-y drabble of a Legendary watching a human play video games rather than trainers throwing Pokeballs at each other.
2. Said story is labeled as the first of a collection of said drabbles and other such stories set in the same continuity as my other Pokemon fics, and there’s intended to be more on the way, so stating it doesn’t have anything to do with Pokemon just from that first drabble is a bit confusing to me. Since you said your reviewing style …
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May 23
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11960091/
As all my chapters are at the most part are unedited and my mind says words faster than my fingers can type there are bound to be a few mistakes. I do plan on going back and editing the chapters eventually though.
May 23
*how
*looking down at his similar one. There were few that could wield these bracelets
In a way, isn’t thinking like talking to oneself? Besides, when characters are talking to others or actually talking aloud to themselves I’ll be using “___” and the text will not be in italics. So it shouldn’t be too distracting for the most part, or confusing.
What I mean is that it looks like characters are talking aloud. Even though the notation is slightly different than in dialogue and there are italics, it’s still a bit disorienting.Huh. I guess we have different perspectives then. I could get rid of that quotations, but I’m use to writing thoughts like that.And now I’ve updated the copypasta to say “talking out loud.”
May 23kurama no jutsu
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11959017/
writing in bold is easier to see…
But it’s also unusual and therefore unnecessarily distracting. Most people format text normally and put author’s notes in bold. Bold is unusual, so it should generally be used to distinguish stuff that isn’t part of the normal story.Thanks for giving the advise :]But I personally prefer it that way.
Everyone has their unique ways of writing a novels so…
May 23ThatMasterLemon
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11961225/
It’s putting REAL Pokemon into scripted situations.
I don’t follow. The pokemon all act like humans, nothing like the animals we see in canon.It’s satire, I sure know what that word means.What is it satire of?Politics and many British sitcoms. Some are affectionate nods and some are mockeries at how pooey they are.Again, what does that have to do with Pokemon?It’s kinda like Pokemon Mystery Dungeon only with a better story.That does not answer my question. You wrote parodies of real life sitcoms and stuck pokemon names on the characters. What does that have to do with Pokemon? If it is possible to remove all references to the source material without having to change anything else, it’s not a derivative work and it’s false advertising to claim otherwise.Having Pokemon in it adds a clever and unique twist.Except if they don’t act anything like the pokemon your readers are familiar with, you’re not actually adding pokemon to a story. You’re repackaging original work as a pokemon story for… what? To rake in more readers than you would otherwise?Interesting that this is the point they chose to tap out.
May 23
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11961271/
Thank you for the help! It was unexpected, but I appreciate it. In this case, his name is actually Gabite, but I will be careful not to make the mistake in future chapters. I was a bit concerned about the length, to be honest, so thank you for pointing it out. I think I’ll likely end up combining what I have for the first two chapters.
May 23
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11959143/
Thank you, I didn’t catch that in the editing. I’ll make sure to go through and and fix those areas. It helps that someone out their is actually catching when I do these kinds of things.
May 23
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11960309/
Thanks for the feedback. I didn’t realize I was formatting my dialogue incorrectly. I’ll keep that in mind when I’m writing from now on. Actually trainers generally start their journey at the age of 10 but that is not always the case as playable characters of Black and White and Black 2 and White 2 are in their mid teens why they are first introduced. And with the age of trainer depends on the type of story that you are writing.
May 23Slackcat
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11959537/
Okay hunny 3 3,33
What even is that? Are they trying to make the :3 emoticon?
May 24
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11955536/
I’ve done my best to fix the mistakes I have made in my grammar and if you find any more please tell me them so I can fix them.
Thanks -Gold
May 24Akashru
A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/11962305/
Thank you. This is precisely the kind of thing I am trying to work on. The review is appreciated. I will work on it. Also thanks for pointing out that I didn’t differentiate between thoughts and speech. I wrote it in the initial version but as I kept improving it to make it better, it got lost somewhere in the way.
Thank you and keep reading.
Akashru
333 is the number of apocalypse. Once 333 Archetypes ascend to the Statosphere and join the Invisible Clergy, the world would end and a new one would be created in the Archetypes’ image.
The number is associated with other phenomena, such as Other Places. Strange things tend to happen at 3:33 AM.
The symbol string you were present with, on the other hand, is clearly a mockery of 333 and the cosmic order as a whole: there are four 3s instead of three and they’re out of order, separated by a space and a comma. That indicates the work of the House of Renunciation agents. Their mission is chaos, they introduce random mental mutation to humanity, typically by reversing beliefs of steadfast advocates of various ideologies like turning pacifist into gun-waving warmongers and vice versa.
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Not anymore!
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The things I do for you people.