Wherein someone refuses to read the capitalization thread or any of my arguments because “I would rather be happy with my story, albeit wrong than unhappy and right.”
CarnileNA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12124666/ Before aynthing, thanks for taking the time for reading and reviewing. I see your point and you know, normally I would take that into account , but I’ve decided to follow Pokémon’s use of capitalization. In their oficial media they write the word “Pokémon” or the different Pokémon like “Charizard, Blastoise” etc. with capitalization. I may change it or not in the future for easier understanding. Thanks for pointing out the mistakes, I actually read this story a few times before uploading, and yet it’s hard to spot every little error; I will make sure to correct them when I get the chance.
MonMinouA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12127635/ Hello! First off, I would like to say thank you for reviewing my story! I will admit, I was actually kind of scared and overwhelmed when I saw the review from you. But now, I’m actually grateful that I got a review like yours. If anything, I actually really needed it! I checked the beta forum you sent me. It seems pretty vacant. Are you sure there are active beta readers there? Thanks for sending me there, though. I had actually wanted a beta reader for a while.Honestly, I’m mentally facepalming myself at some of the mistakes I made in the story. I think it’s because I typed a majority of the story on my phone. I don’t know if it could be considered a legit reason, though. Thank you for bringing them all up.And about that part with Meifen dunking her mouth to drink the water… Can’t I also have her think “Wait, why am I drinking the water like that?” and then have her see her own reflection? Though I may most likely consider your idea as well.
Also, as of now, I’m not really planning on writing the whole game (though, I might change my mind???). If anything, I’m considering it more as a novelization of the first few chapters of the game, but with more of a realistic feel to it. Though, I do need to work on it more. It’s my first time trying out something like this. I actually am thinking of adding something new to the story, now that I’m thinking about it. But yeah, I should’ve mentioned earlier in the chapter that it’ll start off as some sot of novelization.
Again, thank you for your help! I’ll get into reading the forums you recommended me!
~Laurette
CreactorTheWriterA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12126941/ Well, thank you for reviewing my story! I appreciate it a lot!
I will take your advice of separating the author note with the Prologue!
I don’t have a beta reader and I don’t really know how to have one?
Telling me would be appreciated too!
And I don’t get those points?;
1. The titles point. How it should be, then? Please explain!
2. The English point. I should get a beta reader, okay, but why? Is my English bad, or simply to make sure I don’t do any mistake?
3. The sentence fragment. I don’t know what you mean???
4. The dropdown menu? Is it the selection chapter menu or something?
For the rest;
1. The “” symbols. I’m sorry, but when I do type these symbols, they automatically transform them into «» symbols. I think I won’t use them anytime soon.
2. The missing capital. Attention error, thanks for noticing it for me! I’ll change it right now!
3. The Summary point. Well, I guess i should change it and put the warning into the author note.
Well, thanks for reviewing my story! I would like to know your personal opinion on the story, please!
Have a nice day!
For future reference, please quote the sections you’re responding to. It’s really frustrating to switch back and forth between two windows.1. In English, every word of a title (except for articles such as “the”, “a”, and “of”) are capitalized. So it should be “The Journey of a Failure” (the first word is always capitalized). If you don’t know basic stuff like this, again, you really shouldn’t be writing in English.
2. Your English isn’t that bad, but you’re going to be making a lot of mistakes (like the title thing) just because you’re unfamiliar with the language, so it’s good to have a reference.
3. Uh, what is your native language? Sentence fragments are a thing in most languages. It’s a sentence that lacks either a verb or a subject; an incomplete, or fragmentary, sentence.
4. Yes. You can list chapter names there, so putting them in the story is a bit redundant.
5. You can fix that by going into Format – AutoCorrect in most word processing programs.
Actually, my native language is french! Canadien-french, to be precise!And I don’t know all the English rules since I’m just in 4 secondaries. (10 grades I think)
I know I lived in Canada, and in most Canada, you talked in English, but in where I am from, English isn’t important.
For the autocorrect, I’m not good with Apple stuff and I still don’t know how to do it. (Yes, I have a Mac)
By the way, this fanfiction is for practice! I hope you’re not taking it too seriously!
Blazizard100A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12126546/ OK thanks for your view, i will try in the future. this was just first chapter and also a short one so, i will change it
Gameguy95Hey, you’ve been giving the same review over and over again here…I get it’s to help out new writers but now it sounds condescending…
What? You’re going to need to give me more explanation than this.40m ago
“You wouldn’t capitalize animal or mouse or dragon, so you shouldn’t capitalize words like pokemon or pikachu or charizard. The only time you should capitalize it is if you’re using it as the pokemon’s name, ie, Ash’s pikachu is called Pikachu. This is because you only capitalize when it’s a proper noun, which are the names of places or things. Similar reasoning should be applied to any other words you’re thinking of capitalizing, like telephone or trainer. Or professor. For more information, look here: topic/11834/55376155/1/Capitalization-Thread”
Yes, and?It’s just that it sounds like you’re one of those websites’ grammar robots who go after new writers. You have good intentions, but you’re repeating yourself more than I can count. There are variations to it, but it made it condescending is all.You clearly haven’t read my profile. Look at it, specifically the last part, and then get back to me.I get it.Okay then.
FancyRamA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12125875/ Damn it, I fixed that error on another site but forgot to come back for this one. To be honest, I’m well aware this isn’t the best way to start this story. But I have serious issues with motivation and after getting to the end of this passage I decided to cut it off and make it a prologue. I just wanted to publish SOMETHING so I would feel compelled to come back and continue this for the people who took the time to read what I wrote. I’m about a page and a half through the actual first chapter right now (which might take a little longer than I would have liked due to school just starting), and I think I’ve hit a couple of your points much better so far. I think you’ll get a much better understanding of what Cade is like and how things might pan out for the rest of the story. I may merge the Prologue with Chapter 1 once that’s ready to publish, based on your review. I definitely think you’re right about it not telling enough about the story, and I think that might hurt me in the future. My neglect to write any kind of author’s note to express my thought process with the prologue is also on me. But I seriously want to thank you for the feedback! If you hadn’t noticed by my lack of other stories, I’m a fairly new writer so a review like yours really helps me a ton with decision making in the future :) TL;DR I know this is a garbage beginning but I needed to publish it for me to write more, if that makes sense.
MeiYanA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12123975/ Hello, thanks for reviewing the story, I really appreciate your feedback. Most of the things you mentioned were things I didn’t catch while proofreading the document, so thank you for pointing those out. As for not tying into the canon and not being a fan fiction, I can see where you’re coming from. I do intend to have the story be related to the PMD story by having a lot of the elements, such as time gears and rescue teams, show up as a key part of the story. I just wanted to get some of the character introductions and backstory out of the way before delving into the story. Also, thank you for reviewing my other story, the comments you made really helped to clear up some things that I was a bit unsure about for the dialogue. Thanks again for taking time to leave feedback, I appreciate it.
AngelTheSeventhA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12130097/ Though I’m pretty sure you’re giving these reviews out arbitrarily, I wanted to thank you for your criticisms anyway. People aren’t usually as blunt. I’ve been making edits to my chapter since I posted and I’ve gone over things you mentioned – I will say you can make scopes with broken glass, but I understand the skepticism – so, thanks for bringing those points to my attention.
Also, I respect what you’re doing with reviewing so many stories. I imagine you piss a lot of people off on this site.
SilverCloversA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12122664/ Ooooh, lots of constructive criticism. Thank you so much, it really means a ton to me.I’ll probably redo the first chapter at some point now that you’ve pointed out several problems. Anyway, thanks again! :D
EthanAlcoholA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12115163/ Sorry for the late reply! Honestly I haven’t checked this website since I published the first chapter, ironically because I myself lost interest in the story I was writing. Despite that, I do appreciate you taking the time to write such an in-depth review of what I’d posted. Since I have no interest in continuing Conquest I probably won’t be adjusting the chapter itself, but I will take into account what you said for future projects. Honestly I chose a Nuzlocke as a premise simply for the game-play challenge, though I ended up enjoying that more than actually having to write the story…which is why I ultimately dropped the project.I agree that I have issues with keeping things in the same tense, this has always been something I struggle with while writing and I need to remember to choose either past or present tense and then stick to it. And I also agree, looking back, that my premise for this story as a whole is pretty stupid. I like writing more dark and gritty stories but it does need to make sense from a story perspective, and I will keep that in mind for next time. Thanks also for the links, they’re really useful!Sorry if this is a little bit all over the place, I just felt like I should take the time to respond since you took the time to read and review my work. I truly appreciate it and will keep your points (along with those in the links provided) in mind for future projects. Thanks again!
skeburtI would like to thank you for that I will get a beta reader hopefully my next chapter will be better.
Wow I greatly appreciate what you say and have taken it to heart. I am working on getting a beta reader and I will be going through and fixing the dialogue in my story.I thank you for everything you have said to me in your review.
Skeburt
Scarclaw of FireclanA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12120978/This is very informative, and I would like to thank you for this.
1. I was sure I had put a line between the authors notes and the beginning, but I guess not. That is also why I italicize. So you know that it isn’t part of the story.2. We capitalize Professor because it’s a title not a description. We also capitalize the Pokemon names because unless the name is changed, that’s their name. Pokemon is capitalized because our computers tell us it’s wrong otherwise.3. We started the story off that way because that’s normally how it happens and we wanted to stay true too that.
4. There are bound to be spelling mistakes. And on the dialog point, we are working on that.
5. People can describe their parents which ever way they wish. Regardless of whether they are their child or not.
6. So what if it isn’t a comic book? I’ve read plenty of books that have described sound effects.
7. No idea, that was my sister. If she wants to include heights, who am I to stop her?
The point to this story is to be a fun fanfic that doesn’t really serve any purpose but to entertain someone who wants to kill a few hours reading about Pokemon. Every story can be unique and worth reading regardless of whether it has the exact same opening as the ones before it. Just because we are not obligated too cover every detail does not mean we aren’t going too. Just because you feel that this isn’t a substantial start doesn’t mean every shares this opinion. I would like to apologize if this sounds rude or rant-y.
secs ago[We also capitalize the Pokemon names because]
Please read my paragraphs all the way to the end. Go to https://www.fanfiction.net/topic/11834/55376155/1/Capitalization-Thread if you have any counterarguments.
[People can describe their parents which ever way they wish. Regardless of whether they are their child or not.]
Okay but why. What is added to the story by having her describe her dad like he’s a guy she just met? What does this tell us about her and the story? If the answer is “nothing, we didn’t think about that”, it’s just weird and distracting.
Same logic applies to everything else. Just because a story is for fun isn’t an excuse not to put effort into it. Think about what you’re doing and whether or not things make sense.
16m ago
We have put effort into it. Just because there are things you don’t understand or mistakes doesn’t mean we haven’t put effort into it. We think about everything we write down, we say it out loud to see if it sounds right that way. I’ve been writing for years, I think I have a basic understanding of what I’m doing.
secs ago[There is no true answer as to whether or not you should capitalize the Pokemon’s name.]
Yes there is. They are common nouns, and common nouns are not capitalized.
[It adds a description for her father.]
I don’t think you’re getting what I’m saying. We are seeing the story through her eyes. Everything in the narration is colored by her perception, and should thus serve both to describe her surroundings *and* to tell us about her personality. What does it tell us about her that she describes her father like she would a stranger?
8h ago
secs agoSo this is such an irrelevant debate you’re not going to look at the place where all your arguments have already been debunked, but you’re still going to waste everyone’s time with the same ridiculous arguments people have been using for years?
“No matter how far away things are, a Pilot’s eyes can see them!” The games do not model correct capitalization in other respects either. Go look up the actual grammar rules for capitalizing “professor”. Notice how the games spit upon that. Then go look at how the games started off writing it PIKACHU and POTION, so no, the games don’t even consistently do it your way.
The games also gave us the hideous “Legendary Dragon-type Pokemon” construction, either because treating all these words as trademarks in-universe means they can’t use plural forms so “Legendary Dragons” was out, or because they simply hate decent writing just that much.
[What it tells us about Lily is that she pays attention to the little details about peoples appearance.]
Once again I don’t think I’m getting this across. The laugh lines part is the most reasonable part of that description. It’s the value statements, particularly “I can see why my mother picked him”, that are weird. That makes her sound like a robot analyzing someone she has no prior relationship with. Why is a child examining their parent through the lens of a spouse?
Capitalize and spell out formal titles such as chancellor, professor, or president when they precede personal names; lowercase elsewhere.Sociology Professor Sally Smith gave a speech. Sally Smith, professor of sociology, gave a speech.
He introduced Boisi Center Director of Special Events Sally Smith, who is also a professor in the Sociology Department.
Sally Smith, associate professor of English and economics, gave a very long speech. – From the Boston College Website. I will have to go back and read what was written to make sure this is followed.I have read about this, and I know I was incorrect about the Pokemon names. Does this mean I’m going to stop capitalizing them? No. Why? Because I would rather be happy with my story, albeit wrong than unhappy and right. If this were a story I was going to publish, I would go back and correct my mistakes if/when needed.Maybe it’s just you. Because again, I’ve done this plenty of times with my parents. But I’m not sure how it makes her sound like a robot. It’s just a statement. What it adds is beyond me because I didn’t write it. My best guess is that it’s a hint towards something to be written later on.There is no point to further discussing this. Because, honestly, I could not care any less than I do right now. Given, your review was helpfully in pointing out things that both my sister and I need to work on but other than that you sound more condescending than helpfully. Maybe you should work on how you come across with these things before writing anything because it will get you nowhere if you sound like that.
secs ago[you sound more condescending than helpfully]
Because it isn’t at all condescending to refuse to read a resource someone directs you to and instead force them to give the exact same argument they’ve already given a thousand times, then decide you can’t be bothered to change anything even though they’re right because you’re just that petty and spiteful. Maybe you should work on not being a dick to people if you don’t want them to be condescending to you.
You have received a message from:
Kiamaxe
https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3942561/
Reply link: https://www.fanfiction.net/pm2/post.php?rid=193763957#new
——————–
I went and read the resource anyways. Because I realized I sounded like a bitch. I’m not being petty or spiteful by not changing anything. I’m not changing it because, again, I would rather be happy and wrong than right and unhappy.
——————–
CarlinPhoenix23A response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12125528/i dont have non story chapters
Your first “chapter” is nothing but a speech key and a list of character ages. That is not story content.ZygardeCompleteFormA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12123009/ Thanks for your helpful review, and from an author too. I will try to uphold your advice and can you give advice for a new fanfic?
Either from pokemon, steven universe or harry potter
TrentopiaA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12122155/
Thanks for the feedback I will be sure to work on my caps and tense problems I have.
EspeonionA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12110228/
Well, this story was not my own idea. It was a viewer submission.
Eon The ZoroarkWell someone’s a critic. I guess you do make a point about just a random introduction, adding too much cleavage, not paragraphing after new speaker, and Bolding the Attacks. I’ll give you my reason and see if you could understamd why, and we could always talk more about this if you feel the need.Bolding attacks: Battle scenes don’t happen all the time, and so when they do, I feel that bolding attacks would make the scenes feel epic, since the Bold looks serious and, as the name states, Bold.Cleavage: This is a T Rated fanfiction, y’know. It’s something you almost can’t avoid. A joke about intimacy, boobs, death or even politics. I know, I know, you’re gonna say there are better ways of writing that, or there was no need to. But I felt that it could be needed, if not now, then later on.Asriel and Chara: Asriel in the Undertale games seems to me as a Charizard in battle, since he has a large beam gun ray, kind of like a Hyper Beam, two swords that seem like Drahon Claws, and a Gaster Blaster like a Fire Blast or Blast Burn. Also, everyone thinks of Asgore as a Fire/Dragon type trainer in the Pokétale AU and Toriel as a Normal/Ground or Fire type Trainer. So it’d kind of seem obvious that Asrielwould be a Fire type and a Dragon type Trainer. As for Chara, it’s kind of like a shortened way of saying Charizard, or Character, where Chara’s name in Undertale comes from.
Not paragraphing at new speaker: Never knew that. I’ll look into it and see how it’s done. Then I’ll give it a shot.
If you still feel that you have concerns, feel free to contact me at any time. Thanks for telling me how you feel. It makes me feel more imperfect, like I need to perfect my skills some more. And that makes it much more of a fun challenge for me. Once again, thank you so much Ellmo, can I call you Elmo? Until we meet again, EonIsOut!
secs agoNot all T-rated fanfic is fetish fic. You can write a mature story without creepily objectifying women. I can assure you, real women’s boobs do not jiggle constantly. That trope is exclusive to pornography. If you’re doing it because it’s your fetish, that’s okay! But you should probably label the fic as such so people know what they’re getting into. If you’re trying to write a serious, mature story, unrealistic anatomy that obviously exists only for fetish purposes just trivializes the seriousness of the story. If you want to be a writer, you need to understand tone consistency.
[I feel that bolding attacks would make the scenes feel epic, since the Bold looks serious and, as the name states, Bold.]
It doesn’t. It looks ridiculous. There’s a reason bold isn’t often used in prose, it’s awkward and stands out too much for mundane events. Would you bold someone talking, or walking somewhere? No, because emphasizing something that common and mundane would look silly. But that’s the equivalent of what you’re doing by bolding attack names in battle.
If you’d like more detailed advice on grammar, this is a good thread: https://www.fanfiction.net/topic/11834/21887406/1/Writing-Guide-Part-One-Grammar
Y’know what, I believe you are right. I guess I might as well start listening to you and Farla (Not like I have a choice). Thanks for redirecting me to Farla, and advising me on what to do and what not to do. See ya soon. Until then, EonIsOut
LatiasLoverA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12179317/
geez, i mean criticism much? i’m just trying to have fun. i love comments but this is ridiculous. Read my other stories sometime, i just love how critical everyone has to be. it’s for fun, and if it’s banned, how are my stories still up? thanks for your great comment. now fuck off.
secs agoIf you think that comment was highly critical, you’ve never seen actual criticism. All I did was warn you about an objective fact and express mild confusion on a few other points. If something that light upsets you this much, then for your own emotional well-being you shouldn’t be posting stories on the internet.
Your story is still up because the moderators are only human. It can take them a very long time to get through the backlog of reports. However, your story is still at risk of being taken down at any point in the future. Furthermore, the rules do not exist for no reason. Script format is bad writing. The story will be much more immersive if you describe things.
my bad, i just hate it when people ruin anything i try to do. my bad.Sure, that’s a reasonable thing to feel. I just don’t understand why you think that’s what I was trying to do.i’m bullied really badly. my bad sir/ma’amI understand. I’ve been there. But, especially on the internet when there’s no actual consequence to communication and you can walk away at any time, it’s important to step back and analyze things. You should look carefully at what’s being said and allow for the possibility that the person isn’t trying to be malicious, especially when they’re a random stranger who has no reason to attack you. You’ll gain nothing by assuming everyone is out to get you — you’re just making yourself more miserable at that point.thanks. anything else? i know i’m not as great as everyone else at writing stories, but, i do it for fun.His friend also showed up for some reason:
KnightsKingDude all his ecters are main characters even sent in ones so just make your account have Pokémon and also a pokehuman like saber and zenith are or a human like black blue red silver and gold are but list pokemon
My of for him was zenith
Zenith
16
Bi
Pokehuman
He uses a shiny greninja shiny arceus and a shiny sylveon/eevee
He is anti social around every one except saber and pokemon henthinks of saber like a brother and the other way around
Oh and his pokeform is a dark arceus solo yeahThat’s pretty much all yeah need name age pokemon species and back story and sexualityI legitimately cannot understand what you are saying.How comeYour messages are incoherent. They’re full of typos and lack punctuation.So what does it matter? At least I know what latias wants in a story.It matters because *I literally could not understand you*. That is the purpose of a standardized set of grammatical rules; so that people can understand each other. When you actively choose not to use them, you are choosing to put the burden of interpretation on the other person for no good reason, and that is extremely inconsiderate.Whatever you grammar naziDo you even know what that word means?Nazi? YesPlease explain, then.The nazi was a dictator ship lead by Adolfo Hitler he lead the Nazis to believe the Jews were the cause of all the wrongs in the world and had the nazis kill over 6 million Jews although originally Hitler’s was a Jew who walked in on his uncle and his mum fucking that’s why he began hating JewsSo do you truly believe that someone telling you they have trouble understanding you is comparable to a genocidal racist?Actually grammar nazi is a term that me and few friends use to depicte some one who doesn’t like us just because of the way we typeWhen did I say I didn’t like you because of the way you type? I dislike you because you’re appropriating an international tragedy for petty reasons. Do you treat your English teacher with this much contempt?Basically saying that we don’t have enough detail in our typing stuff like thatHow do you know If im in school?You say so on your profile.ToucheSo answer the question. Do you treat your English teacher with this much contempt? Do you hand in English essays that force everyone else to wrack their brains trying to figure out what you meant because you couldn’t be bothered to hit the period key? Do you insist that their inability to understand you is purely their problem? Do you compare them to murderous, genocidal dictators because they dare to point this out?NoSo why do you behave that way towards strangers?Because stranger dangerBristleA response to your review at https://www.fanfiction.net/r/12123771/ Thanks for your review, but as I said, this is my first fic I ever did. I love writing, and it´s a fic so you shouldn´t get too serious about it. I´ll still try to improve and thanks for the tips, however the choices I made about letting the pokemon speak and stuff, are still my choices. Anyways, I rewrote this chapter (Before I read your review) and even if I say so myself, I think I improved it a little bit. But you shouldn´t take this all serious because it is and stays a fanfic. Anyways, have a good morning/afternoon/evening.
secs ago[But you shouldn´t take this all serious because it is and stays a fanfic.]
I am very sad that you see such little worth in yourself and your work.