Dragon Quill

So! Persona 5. My expectations are at rock bottom after the atrocious slop that was Persona 4, but from what I can tell the general fandom opinion is that this one is at least interestingly bad. Crossing my fingers that means there will be something worth suffering through “Haha sexual harassment is funny!” this time. (I am still, of course, expecting a baseline level of funny sexual harassment; I’m keeping my expectations realistic, here.)

…Aaand the opening movie immediately flashes us with sexy catgirl butt. Off to a great start.

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After returning home, we’re introduced to our diegetic save function.

Sojiro: I’m obligated to report on you, which is why I’m having you record your daily activities.

So is the implication that we’re recording all our illegal and supernatural activities too? I don’t know what Niijima was complaining about, she should have plenty of evidence against us.

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Oh hey, more students with Protagonist Hair.

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How has it been an in-game week and we’re still in the prologue?

Morgana doesn’t have a place to stay, so Damien agrees to let him stay at Leblanc. Why does he think Sojiro would allow that?

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I’m finally able to walk around freely.

Well, mostly.

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I genuinely thought the resolution might happen immediately this time, but no, once again we have to wait until the deadline to advance the plot regardless of when we complete the objective. What is pacing?

During downtime we’re introduced to a new teacher. I know I said I didn’t want quirky, but he looks about as generic as possible.

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I said I was done after the ridiculous padding of the calling card mechanic, and I meant it. I trudged through all of Persona 4 and I’m not making that mistake again. I’m told the story does not get better after this, so I don’t think I’m missing much.

I am genuinely astounded this game got published. I have never seen a script so incoherent and confusing since HEARTBEAT, and that was an indie project by fascist nutjobs, not a AAA release from one of the most popular series in modern gaming. There is no consistency to anything and the pacing is nonsensical when it’s not completely backwards.

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